Crossing the Road #1 - 'Your Tram Stop Kitchen'

March 3, 2017

Hello dear reader! Welcome to a brand new segment on ParmaDaze which I am dubbing "Crossing the Road".

The point of Crossing the Road is to feature some parmas that, while they may be great, never get a guernsey as they are only available via delivery. The Menulog, the Uber Eats, the EatNow, the Delivery Hero and the Deliveroo parmas that, while not boasting the same atmosphere and range of alcohol options as a parma at your local pub, afford the opportunity to eat a parma without pants and not be told "You have to put on some jeans or get out of the bistro", "people are trying to eat" and "for the love of god sir, where are your underpants?!"

Now this won't happen often, don't think I'm going to get lazy and just sit at home ordering delivery parmas from here on out (even though that is damn tempting), but my goal is to have it as an occasional pop-up, maybe even a bonus post in addition to the regular review (although not this week).

So without further ado, lets get this chicken crossing the road!

Where? - Shop 3, 76-78 Keilor Rd, Essendon North

Price? - $16 for Standard/Bolognaise. $18 for Calabrese/Tropicana

Website? http://www.yourtramstopkitchen.com.au/

Reviewers – Lee & Nikki

Delivery areas - Aberfeldie, Airport West, Ascot Vale, Avondale Heights, Brunswick, Carlton North, Coburg, Essendon, Fawkner, Flemington, Glenroy, Gowanbrae, Hadfield, Kealba, Keilor East, Keilor Park, Kingsville, Maribyrnong, Moonee Ponds, Niddrie, Oak Park, Pascoe Vale, Preston, Princes Hill, Seddon, Strathmore, Sunshine, Travancore, Tullamarine, University of Melbourne, Westmeadows

Hot damn that is a lot of suburbs.

So! When starting a new segment such as this I said to myself "How should I start a new segment such as this?". I had one place in mind that we had been recommended, but as luck would have it we decided to launch this little experiment on the one day of the week that the certain establishment I had in mind wasn't open for delivery - So that one will be pushed until next time.

The most simple solution I could come up with was to fire up the app and pick the highest rated place I could find that served a parma. Onto the iPad I delved and brought forth the list

There she blows! Four and a half stars for Your Tram Stop Kitchen. For a little extra reassurance I checked out the user reviews to see what they had to say...

Thats a lot of tens! All seemingly from February 2017. I did a little research and it would seem that Your Tram Stop Kitchen Just opened this month, but nobody seems to upset! I checked the menu for our target

Four options, all reasonably priced. For the sake of variety Reviewer Nikki opted for the Parmigiana Bolognese while I went with the standard parma.

No beers here I'm afraid. Had to go non-alcoholic this week, Luckily there were still some cans of 150 Lashes in the fridge from the weekend's festivities.

25% off the first order meant a saving of over $10 - A very nice surprise indeed.

I got the confirmation of order with an estimated delivery time of 1 hour. To kill the time I looked up Your Tram Stop Kitchen of Facebook and nabbed this photo of their interior -

Doesn't look too shabby! For all intents and purposes a nice, clean, well furnished take-away joint.

30 minutes after advising the food would arrive in an hour there was a ring on the doorbell. Bonus!

I collected our dinner and spread it out on the dining room table for a photoshoot.

The first thing that struck me, as I'm sure you've noticed, is that rather than opt for a full sized parma the Tram Stop Kitchen has gone for two smaller chicken fillets. both crumbed and prepared as individual mini-parmas. I'd normally be a little miffed at this but when I cut in to find pure, fresh chicken breast as opposed to Coles deli-window schnitzels (always a huge risk when ordering delivery) I was much more forgiving. I'll take two smaller real chicken breasts over a large slab of factory made crap any day of the week.

The crumbing was fine, didn't have much of a crunch but its hard to expect anything that's taken a 10 minute drive in a plastic box to remain crunchy. The chicken, as mentioned, was real chicken breast, albeit a little dry. Not a terrible start to the dish!

The toppings on the traditional were fine. Good coverage of cheese and napoli. Nothing stellar, but they were flavoursome enough. Unfortunately this parma was without a slice of ham, something which would have really helped this dish. The Tropicana option that we didn't get comes with a slice of ham instead of pineapple. I'd get this instead if I ever returned to the Tram Stop.

I asked Reviewer Nikki her thoughts of the bolognese parma and her response was "it's nice but it needs ham, and the bolognese needs more sauce - it's a little dry"

The chips, like the crumbs, didn't fare too well in the hotbox. They could have used some seasoning as well. But there was a decent serve at least and, although soggy, were still piping hot when they arrived.

The salad was your traditional pizza place salad, which I couldn't describe more succinctly than this clip from Family Guy

But it was surprisingly fresh and un-wilted.

For only $16 I can forgive the majority of the slip ups, and the 25% discount for first time orders doesn't hurt it either. I'm not gonna hurry back to Your Tram Stop Kitchen - But I've got no problems knowing that its there.

If you're in the delivery zone and can take advantage of the 25% discount I'd say give it a crack, Hell even full price is cheaper than what you'd get elsewhere so might as well try it then too.

And that about wraps up the first Crossing the Road! I wasn't blown away but I'd call it a successful experiment. I'm not gonna score these as comparing a pub parma to a delivery parma is like comparing apples and oranges. Well. Not that much of a difference. Apples and Pears.

Catch you next week for a proper pub parma, with beers and everything!

... Now where did I put my pants?

The search continues...

Special Attempt - Aussie Parmageddon @ The Skinny Dog

January 27, 2017

Where? - 155 High St. Kew

Price? - $20 Parmageddon special

Website? http://www.skinnydoghotel.com.au/

Reviewers – Cale, Daniel, Grace, Lee, Nikki, Shanan, Tony

Last week I received an email from the good folks at Kew's Skinny Dog Hotel with some news, news that they were brewing something special for the oncoming Australia Day.

Rather than repeat all their plans for what took place I'll just show you one of their promo images that was circulated...

Sounds like a fantastic day! On top of that, the Skinny Dog invited us down on the 26th to sample their range of Aussie themed parmas and make a very important judgement - Which of the Aussie parma varieties would take the crown as the Aussiest of them all. Sounds like a much better Australia Day than batch microwaving 10 frozen parmas! After the tradition of a barbie, backyard cricket and a few cheeky cans was complete we headed over to the Skinny Dog to see what they had to offer.

I haven't been to the Skinny in quite a while, and it's great to see that they haven't lost their cool, funky aesthetic. The beer garden was pumping out the tunes so we took a seat in the quieter restaurant section (although it was filling up fast). The specials menu was already waiting for us on the table...

To be quite honest, they all sounded amazing. After making sure we had at least one of each being ordered around the table we placed our order and awaited the arrival of our dinner.

Normally this is where I put in a little spiel about what beers are on offer at the Skinny Dog, but to be honest I didn't look past the $20 buckets of Colonial cans. Can't go wrong.

Shortly after ordering the parmas arrived and the judging commenced...

Apologies that I couldn't find an emoji to represent Melbourne. The Emoji gods really need to get on that.

Hot damn that was a big parma. Of the four options I selected the Brett Lee so my thoughts will mostly be on that, with some opinions on the other parmas from everyone else below.

First up, the Schnitzel was phenomenal. Absolutely huge and of the purest quality chicken breast. It was crumbed ever so lightly and cooked to perfection with a satisfying crunch.

The thick cut bacon on the Brett Lee was an explosion of flavour that paired perfectly with the tang of the BBQ sauce. I'm not normally a massive egg fan, but the yolk on top of the Brett Lee was cooked just right, its juicy goodness flowing down around the other toppings and enhancing them all.

It may have been the influence of the cans that I had enjoyed before heading to the Skinny Dog, but I really enjoyed the Brett Lee.

We have visited the Skinny Dog before, and I've long held the opinion that their sides were probably the weakest part of the dish. Last night we discovered that this has changed, with both elements of the side dishes receiving a major upgrade.

First up the chips. The first time we had the Skinny Dog's parma we god Maccas fries (ugh). The second time we got crinkle cut chips (better, but could use some improvement). Last night we got near perfection. Beer battered beauties that maintained a solid crunch on the outside while remaining hot, soft and pillowy on the inside.

The biggest surprise was the salad - I'd go as far to say the best side salad I've had in at least six months. A sort of garden salad/coleslaw hybrid. Fresh, well dressed and absolutely bursting with flavour

Now, some thought from everyone else on their parmas -

“Overall the meal was great. Parma could have used a little more seasoning”

— Tony - The Melbourne

“Great value, big feed with a pot ... Great. Would have loved a bigger pie on the MCG”

— Shanan - The MCG

“Great value parma. Overall good flavour & sides were top notch. Well worth the $20”

— Grace - The Bondi Beach

“Not too bad this time around! Bloody great value with the beer”

— Cale - The Brett Lee

“Really enjoyed the parma & chips, however the MCG disappointed slightly with its promise on the meat pie on top”

— Daniel - The MCG

It would seem everyone walked away happy! With the most minor of gripes coming from the two that ordered the MCG, it would seem that, in their minds, they had pictured a full sized Four n' Twenty perched atop their parma, when in reality the MCG comes with a few party pies on top instead.

For $20 on a Thursday with a beer thrown in this is an outstanding value meal that I'd have zero qualms recommending. Get down and try your favourite ASAP!

Now, as the Skinny Dog invited us down and new we were coming this one falls in the category of an unranked special attempt, I'm a little sad about that as there has been a marked improvement on this parma since we last visited - It's now definitely on our list for an official redo so you can expect to see it again soon.

But which one was the most Aussie? My heart leans toward the Melbourne, as what is more Aussie that a good ol' Parma with chips, salad and some beers. I'm tempted to give it to the MCG out of sheer inventiveness, such a unique and Australian dish. The Bondi can get stuffed because we're from Melbourne and it's our legal duty as citizens of this city to refuse to acknowledge that Sydney is good at anything.

However... I think I've gotta give it to the Binga himself - The Brett Lee. Be it a burger, a pizza or a parma, A fried egg on top is synonymous with Aussie grub, and the Brett Lee at the Skinny Dog is as Aussie as they come.

Massive thanks to the Skinny Dog Hotel for inviting us down for a great day! Hope you all had an Awesome Australia Day as well.

The search continues...

Special Attempt - 'Tour de Byron'

October 28, 2016

Ahh Byron, That town that pretends its in Queensland when its really in New South Wales, although you wouldn't know it from looking. Byron Bay is the quintessential Queensland beach town - It's laid back, its chilled, and I'm pretty sure only one in ten residents actually owns a pair of shoes. As is tradition here at ParmaDaze, I took it upon myself to sample as many chicken parmas as the tiny beach town had to offer as I could in the time I was there. After the first day in Byron it struck me that if you aren't a fan of surfing or sitting on the beach then there isn't a whole lot to do other than pull up a pew at a pub and sink some pints in the sun ... Luckily they are more than prepared for this as there is a new pub almost every 100 meters - All three of the parmas I will write about below were consumed on the main street.

PARMA #1 - BYRON BAY SERVICES CLUB

The Byron Bay Services Club was a godsend. Literally next door to where we were staying, for the entire week I was no more than a 60 second walk from their bistro, public bar, pool tables, lounge, kids play area, pokies, outdoor pokies and beer garden. With rooms upon rooms this place was massive, super friendly, inviting, and the first parma we partook in on the trip...

The weakest part of this dish was probably the schnitzel, It was unprocessed but came out quite dry when served. The toppings were spot on though, plenty of cheese grilled to a perfect bubbly golden brown, and plenty of fresh napoli & ham underneath. The chips were pretty standard, not bad but in desperate need for some seasoning.

The coleslaw on the side was super creamy and accompanied the dish well (I'm always a fan of coleslaw with my parma), and really helped to hide the dryness of the schnitzel.

In the time we were in Byron I had this parma twice and it was pretty much identical both times. Worth a visit, especially on parma night when it's an absolute bargain.

PARMA #2 - THE RAILWAY FRIENDLY BAR

As soon as I saw the Railway I fell in love. A small, quaint bar inside is engulfed by a mammoth beer garden with every style of outdoor seating you can imagine. A small container kitchen tacked on to the outside of the pub runs the grub with a strong "food truck" vibe. The menu is simple - Burgers, pub classics and a selection of pasta dishes (interesting for a pub, but not unwelcome!) We ordered the parma and it was delivered to us post-haste...

This parma screamed freshness, the salad especially looked like it had been plucked from the garden moments before hitting the plate. The schnitzel was thick and juicy with a decent coverage of toppings, the napoli being quite flavoursome overpowered a lot of the other elements. The chips were pretty standard, although the dusting of chicken salt was much appreciated.

I'd say the Rails' parma was better than the Services Club's, but only slightly. The beers went down phenomenally as well.

PARMA #3 - THE BEACH HOTEL

The Beach Hotel is the big boy. The Main Event. Boasting stunning beach views it is absolutely massive both inside and out, and in the three or four times we visited over the course of the week (what can I say? I like beers!) I never once saw it quiet.

We ordered the parma, grabbed a pint and sat back in the sun, much like the bar the kitchen was going non stop so I settled in for a bit of a wait, however we didn't wait long as our boomerang buzzer rang no more than ten minutes after placing the order.

It was a weird looking parma, looking closer to a kiev than a schnitzel, but got damn was it full of flavour. Despite being a bit burnt on the underside the chicken remained juicy throughout (a byproduct of not being hammered thin I would imagine) and was surprisingly filling - although that may have been a result of the mountain of super creamy coleslaw the parma arrived alongside... They do seem to like their coleslaw in Byron.

The chips, again, were pretty standard, however the Beach had a full sauce and seasoning station to help bring them back to life a little. Decent parma, great pub.

I won't score these parmas as this is just a special attempt, but if I had to rank them I'd say the Railway delivered the best. Followed closely by the Rails and the Beach bringing up the rear very close behind. None of them were bad by any means and I'd gladly try them all again.

I wasn't quite sure what to expect when we booked the trip to Byron Bay, but I was pleasantly surprised. It's a great little town absolutely teeming with character, I don't want to make this sound like a travel blog but you have the opportunity to visit Byron Bay its definitely worth your time.

Oh, and we also did a brewery tour of Stone & Wood...

It was awesome.

Special Attempt - 'The Racecourse Hotel for the Good Friday Appeal'

April 3, 2015

[info]When? - 2nd of April, 2015

Where? The Racecourse Hotel, 895 Dandenong Rd. Malvern East

Price? - $25 Charity event special

Website? http://www.racecoursehotel.com.au/

Reviewers – Emma, Lee, Nikki & Tim [/info]

Happy Easter everyone!

Now you're all most likely out enjoying the long weekend and not reading about chicken parmas, but this is just a quick update on what we got up to last night.

A few weeks back I heard that both The Racecourse Hotel and The Rosstown hotel were putting on a special event - $25 for a parma and pot from 12 - 9 on Thursday April 2nd, with 100% of the profits going directly to the Royal Children's Hospital Good Friday Appeal.

This is an idea I was more than happy to throw my full support behind - I wouldn't be alive without The Royal Children's, so I know first hand of all the good they do.

So last night we loaded up the parma bus and headed out to Malvern East, to the Racecourse Hotel.

Now I'm not listing this as an official attempt as it was a one-day thing, so if anything this is more to raise awareness and give some props to a couple of pubs that did a really cool thing.

We sat down at the table and were greeted by our first Easter surprise ...

Such a cool little touch.

The pub was packed with hungry parma lovers, which gave me the warm & fuzzies. Full details of the event were attached to the front of the menu -

Sounds good to me! we placed our orders and waited for the meals to arrive.

Beer list at the Racecourse is pretty standard, nothing to write home about, but including Little Creatures as the free pot was definitely appreciated.

Shortly after we ordered the parmas arrived ...

I was so glad that they didn't cheap out for the parma deal. Real chicken breast with perfectly cooked crumbs that had an amazing crunch. The schnitzel was big, thick and a great foundation for the meal.

The toppings were also pretty good. The inclusion of ham was greatly appreciated and very flavoursome. The napoli was fine (could have used a little more coverage) and the mozzarella was melted to perfection.

The chips were your standard store-bought beer battered oven chips - The lack of salad meant there were heaps of them, and they were perfectly cooked and seasoned (I didn't realise just how well seasoned they were and proceeded to add salt myself ... my bad)

As I said there was no salad included in the dish, it was available for an extra charge but we chose not to partake.

Even if it wasn't for charity I'd be happy with the parma at The Racecourse - It has just rocketed up our list of parmas to try, as I am very keen to go back and check out how it does in a non-special situation.

As I said this was just a quick review to shine some light on folks that went above and beyond to help those in need, the parma wasn't perfect (although it was damn good) but I'm trying not to criticise too much, as it's all for a good cause. It was a great initiative that I was glad to be a part of.

Have a great long weekend - Back to regular business next week!

Special Attempt - 'PD goes to PD #2'

October 22, 2014

When? - 19th of October, 2014

Where? Central Hotel, 9 Macrossan St. Port Douglas

Price? - $24

Website? http://www.centralhotelportdouglas.com.au/

Reviewers – Lee & Nikki

As I said at the end of last week's update - If I find myself in front of another parma while in Port Douglas for the week I will let you know - Well I found one, this is me letting you know!

Now don't fret, there will still be a Melbourne-based review up on Friday, this is just a little bonus. It would've been done earlier but my laptop decided to have an emotional and physical breakdown mere hours after the last review went live, I'm still working on getting her patched up so this review is going out from my Melbourne based work computer.

So after a mediocre-at-best parma at The Court House I wanted to make things right - Surely that was not the best parma Port Douglas had to offer!

Not two minutes walk from The Court House is Central Hotel, a pub very similar in vibe to The Court House - A down to earth Aussie pub with an emphasis on outdoor entertainment. Much luke The Court House the Central is 20% pub, 80% beer garden, with a multitude of outdoor eating & drinking areas (a deck on the main drag, a raised deck just behind it with its own cocktail bar and an outdoor beer garden/cinema out the back)

The kitchen didn't open until eleven so we kicked back with a few pots on the deck while we waited (don't judge me, I was on holiday). The menu's were already on the table so we sighted the parma and were ready to go as soon as the kitchen fired up...

The deck on the main drag is a great place to kick back and people-watch. There is a pub next door that does nightly cane-toad races which are a load of fun (we would've gone there, but they don't do a parma).

After about 20 minutes our parmas arrived. I was hoping for the best, I really was...

And from first glance it looked okay - Unfortunately once I cut into it the horrible truth was revealed - Processed, heart shaped schnitzel, almost directly from the supermarket shelf. The crumbs were thick as buggery and it was dry as hell. Not sure what happened to the parma but mine came out luke-warm. It was okay when I first tucked in but by the time I finished it was stone cold - and I'm not a slow eater.

The toppings were okay and did their best to try and salvage the dish, but its hard to come back from such a bad foundation. Plenty of tasty, gooey mozzarella cooked just to my liking, the ham was packaged as well but thats a little easier to stomach, the napoli was tasty as well - but still from a jar.

The chips were actually pretty good. Beer battered, well cooked and hot. Well seasoned with an array of sauce options at the bar. The menu states that all main meals come with your choice of steak sauce - But I forgot to bring it up when I ordered and they didn't mention it - but I'm sure if you brought it up they'd throw in a side of gravy for chip dippage, bringing these ones to their A game.

The salad, while presented beautifully in a little origami bamboo boat, was a little 'meh'. It looked great on the plate, but after eating the top layer of grated carrot and dressing all that was left underneath was a few dry lettuce leaves - this is why you have to toss your salad through the dressing rather than just squirt it on top.

$24 is too much for this parma, I could handle this if it was a $12-with-a-pot special but $24 is a hefty price for processed schnitzel. Put a few extra bucks into your ingredients and invest in some real chicken. I could handle the so/so salad and package toppings if there was a good bird beneath it all.

As with last week's special attempt I'm not gonna give this one a score, but again, it wouldn't be great if I did. If I had to choose I'd probably take Central Hotel's parma over The Court House's - but only barely, They're pretty comparable but I think the Central's chips just pipped them at the post.

So that was our Port Douglas adventure! We didn't get to any other parmas before hopping on a plane back to Melbourne.

Be sure to stay tuned for Friday as we are heading back for a redo of one of the first parmas we ever did! (I hear it has gotten a lot better) ... see you then!

Special Attempt - 'PD goes to PD'

October 17, 2014

When? - 16th of October, 2014

Where? The Courthouse Hotel, Corner Macrossan & Wharf Streets, Port Douglas

Price? - $24, $17 on Mondays

Website? http://courthousehotelportdouglas.com.au/

Reviewers – Lee & Nikki

There wasn't as much fanfare for this special attempt (especially when compared to the one we had a couple of weeks ago), But that's mostly because I forgot this one was even happening. A family reunion of sorts has whisked me up from Port Douglas from Wednesday to Monday which put me out of state for our usual parma night, So at the last minute I had to work out some sort of tactic for review - And this is what I came up with!

We started our trip with a night in Cairns - I was a little worried after this initial night as I had my feelers out for some parma action, but every place I passed just advertised "Schnitzel" without any sort of toppings - Now I've got absolutely nothing against a good schnitty, but this website isn't called SchnitzelDaze.

So Cairns was a bust, we jumped into the hired QLD Parma Bus and drove up to Port Douglas where the rest of the Trip will take place. The first day here I wandered down the main street and found no less than three pubs that do some sort of variation on a parma. At the time of writing this review I've only done one of them, but who knows what I'll get up to in the next three nights. I'll update if I partake again.

I wasn't 100% set on which parma we were doing until we walked down the street on the way to parma night, but we walked passed the Courthouse Hotel and it was pumping. The place is absolutely massive, mostly because they have erected massive marquees on all sides of the pub, expanding outward like the Blob, slowly consuming the entire town with picnic tables and reasonably priced daiquiris.

Despite its immense size the Courthouse was packed. The queue to place an order was a good thirty minute wait, with a 45 minute wait after the food was ordered (at least they had the courtesy to let us know there would be a delay when we ordered thought, so we were prepared for it.

At pretty much 45 minutes on the dot our parmas arrived -

I wan't a fan of the schnitzel at all, the crumbs had the consistency of KFC chicken coating moreso than actual crumbs, but without the 11 secret herbs and spices. It was real chicken, but quite dry and stringy. Size-wise it was erring on the small side, although not overly so - I can say I was full by the end of the meal.

The toppings were as equally "meh" as the schnitzel. The napoli tasted like direct-from-the-jar leggo's pasta sauce, the ham added about as much flavour as a piece of damp paper. The cheese was a mozzarella and tasty blend, which I normally don't mind as it can add a bit of bite to a sometimes bland ordeal, Unfortunately this wasn't the case, There was plenty of cheese, It just didn't do too much.

The chips would have been amazing - had they been served an hour prior.

They were beer battered and perfectly seasoned, and plenty of them too - however they were damp and limp, as if we got the end of the bowl that had been sitting in the kitchen since the dinner shift started.

On the positive side the salad was pretty great. A fusion of a garden salad and rich, creamy coleslaw. All the ingredients were fresh, crisp and flavoursome. Parmas that just have a massive mound of coleslaw as a side can be a little heavy and overpowering, but this mix of both was the perfect accompaniment to the dish.

As with special attempts I'm not gonna give this parma an official score, but you can probably guess how it would go if I did ... Not good. However if we had a category for atmosphere it would get full marks. The live music under the marquee, beers by the beach and cheap mango daiquiris make the Courthouse a great spot to stop into, but I'd avoid the parma. There is a $17 Parma night on Mondays, but to be honest I still think thats a little expensive for what we were served (and the $24 that we actually paid is bordering on outrageous.

So here I sit, a little dejected as I haven't yet found a good parma for PD in PD, but it's hard to stay upset for long when this is my view while writing this post...

I'm not sure what the plans are for the rest of this trip, but if I venture out again I'll be sure to update with my findings - If not, I'll see you back in Melbourne next week!

The search continues...

Special attempt - 'Tour de Hobart'

September 3, 2014

If you don't follow us on Facebook, Twitter or Instagram, you're probably wondering where the hell we were last week, Well long story short two of our ParmaDaze review team, Reviewers Shanan and Kylie got hitched over the weekend - So major congratulations to those guys!

The happy couple Reviewers Shanan & Kylie, surrounded by Reviewers Stefo, Fridge, Adam and Cale - Good looking bunch, aren't they?

They held the wedding in Hobart, and our plans were to go down on the Wednesday prior and make it a bit of a holiday - But that would put us out of Melbourne for Thursday parma night! Never fear, as I had just heard that the TV show "Discover Downunder" had just named The Brunswick Hotel in Hobart "Australia's Best Parma".

It all fell into place! We'd go to Hobart, Try the (alleged) best parma in the country and that would be the review for the week! Seemed like a good plan, what I didn't count on was finding myself in far too many pubs over the course of 6 days, and as we all know, with pubs ... come parmas.

Now we've got a fair bit to cover (5 parmas) So I'm gonna try keep these short and sweet! Now they're special attempts so I wont be giving them an official score, but I'll definitely let you know what I think of each and every one of them. Here we go!

PARMA #1 - THE SHIPWRIGHT'S ARMS

I'll say it up front, the Shippies is quite possibly my favourite pub in Hobart. Set in the quaint backstreets of Battery Point, this is a pub that just oozes charm inside and out. It's an old-world pub with a classic feel that you could just get lost in all afternoon.

We arrived at the Shippies on Wednesday, the first night in town, and I'm not going to lie - We had downed a few beverages before arriving. It was still relatively early so we found a spot in the Bistro pretty easily (I would recommend booking in the future though, as I have been turned away on more than one occasion when arriving at peak hour without a booking).

We got seated in prime position in the bistro, in front of a roaring fireplace, and took a gander at the menu -

Done and done - it's also worth noting that there is a parma special also available three days of the week...

I feel that Disney's copyright lawyers might be giving these guys a call soon regarding their choice of font.

We ordered the parmas and kicked back in front of the fire, enjoying a few more drinks and soaking up the atmosphere. I spied a cosy looking beer garden out the back that I had never seen before, but it was getting a little chilly so we decided to stay in front of our fireplace.

Before too long (about 3/4's of a Captain Morgan & Coke) Our parmas arrived...

Now first thing I'm going to apologise for in this review is the lack of photos and the poor quality of this one - I wasn't on my A game and only managed to take the vertical shot of the Shippies parma, but you can pretty much see that the deal is.

First up, the schnitzel was pure white chicken breast, practically swimming in its own juiciness. The crumbs were thin and crunchy and it was of a decent size, not overly thin, but not massive either.

On top of the melted cheese the Shippies sprinkled a hearty layer of parmesan before grilling - I've seen a dusting of parmesan before, but this was laid on thick - It was different, I liked it, but I don't think its something I'd want on every parma I have as it was quite rich.

The napoli sauce was a contentious point, While it was damn tasty, fresh and chunky it was quite sweet which, like the parmesan, I didn't mind too much, but was a little overpowering by the end of the meal. Some of the other reviewers at the table disagreed with me though, and thought it was amazing.

The chips and salad were a bit of a let down compared to the parma itself. Standard bag chips and a stock standard salad - although I always appreciate some capsicum mixed through a salad, it was still average, it was sad as they had started so strong with their bird

The parma at The Shippies is fantastic, no question, they do make a couple of odd choices with some of the elements but variety is the spice of life and at least they're trying something new.

I'll be back to the shippies, It remains one of my favourite Hobart pubs and I will make a point of stopping in every time I'm in town.

PARMA #2 - THE SHAMROCK HOTEL

Note: The Shamrock has had a coat of paint since this photo was taken, but this was the most recent one I could find.

The Shamrock is an unassuming little pub, with the plethora of options in Hobart for a place to wet your whistle it can kind've blend into the background - but If you find yourself in the city and are on the lookout for a cheap, quick lunch its worth ducking your head in.

Much like the Shippies the Shamrock is an old world pub - walking in the door you get the sense that the interior hasn't been altered since 1974, and I love it that way. Its one of those pubs where you can pull up a pew and watch the world outside go by while you sit on a pint.

The highlight of the Shamrock, however, is their $10 Lunch menu. On a blackboard up one end of the pub is a list of about 10 classic pub grub items. Burgers, schnitzels, steaks - All quality, all $10. The people of Hobart know it too, as from 11:30 this place is inundated with locals bustling to get their lunchtime fix.

Unfortunately,The chicken parma doesn't appear on their $10 lunchtime specials board, a tragedy I know, but you have to go full menu if you want to sample ($20-ish). I won't lie, it kind've stings when the girl next to me orders a schnitzel with mushroom sauce for $10, and I've gotta fork out an extra blue one for parma toppings.

I placed the order, grabbed a pint, walked back to the table, took three sips and bam. The parmas arrived at the table. It was literally no more than four minutes between placing the order and when the parma came out - These guys know their lunch rush and must have some schnitty's ready to go, I was a little worried when this happened, as usually speed≠ quality when it comes to parmas.

Suspicions were allayed once I tucked in, this was still a quality schnitzel. Not quite to the level as it was at the Shippies, but it was fresh, piping hot and covered in a healthy serving of ... salami?

I'm not sure what happened in the kitchen, maybe they ran out of ham, but my parma came out covered in salami instead - Now, In my book this is a bonus, salami trumps ham. However when I bragged about it on Instagram I was met with some disdain - apparently not everyone is as big of a fan of salami as I am and marked it down because of it. To each his own I guess, but I took that one as a positive.

The napoli tasted kind've canned, but there was plenty of it and it was relatively tasty. The cheese was there, but it wasn't really anything noteworthy - I was still buzzing that I got some free salami.

The chips with the Shammy parma were damn good. I'm gonna call it early and say they were the best chips we had in the five parmas tried on the trip. Beer battered, golden brown, perfect crunch and seasoned to perfection.

The salad was pretty standard pub garden salad. Fresh, but kinda dry - could've really used an extra squeeze of dressing.

As much as I liked unsolicited salami, the toppings on the Shamrock parma are just not worth the extra $10. It's still a damn good pub that serves a great quality pub meal at bargain prices - but save yourself a tenner and go for the schnitzel and gravy instead (or mushroom/pepper sauce) You get the same quick, quality meal, the same fantastic chips and you save enough extra cash for a pint to accompany it.

PARMA #3 - IRISH MURPHY'S

On Friday morning we called The Brunswick Hotel to see if we could secure a table for that night to try a parma, but we were shut down ... I should have listened to everyone who told me we should book well in advance. It hurt, but people were still hankering for some parmas, so we wandered down Salamanca Pl. and found a very inviting looking Irish Pub - Irish Murphy's

Now if you've been into a Bridie O'Reilly's, Pugg Mahone's or PJ O'Brien's you know the score and I don't really need to go into much more detail about the decor of this pub. There was a pretty large group so we took a table on the dance floor and checked the menu -

Done and done. We placed our orders at the bar and waited. I'd say a pint later and our food arrived -

The schnitzel was great quality. Crumbed to perfection with just the right about of crunch. It was topped with generous lashings of ham and a heap of bubbly golden-brown cheese (there were some minor nudity issues, but nothing major). This parma had one major problem though ... it was as dry as Uluru on February 3rd.

There was one 2 square inch section of the parma that contained any semblance of napoli, but the rest was bone dry. It was more like eating a chicken, ham and cheese sandwich than it was a parma. It didn't help that the schnitzel was also devoid of moisture, normally a slightly dry schnit can be saved with a good napoli - not in this case.

It was disappointing, as the foundations of this parma looked so great, and the one (albeit tiny) portion of the parma that did have napoli was actually pretty damn tasty - it was just a shame they couldn't carry it through the rest of the dish.

Chips were well seasoned but a little undercooked and there wasn't nearly enough of them. The beetroot in the salad was a nice touch, but overall it was another afterthought of an addition to the meal. Irish Murphy's had a good atmosphere though. The footy was on the big screen, there was a great little heated seating area out the front, right on Salamanca - We stayed there the rest of the night, hoping to god our hangover for the morning of the wedding the next day wouldn't be too bad.

PARMA #4 - BARCELONA

Sunday morning.

The wedding the day previous had gone off without a hitch, it was a fantastic day and even better evening. The following morning however, was a little dusty. I crawled out of bed at about 10:30 and we got a group together to hunt down some breakfast.

Not far from Irish Murphy's, just behind Salamanca Place is a large, open area known as "Salamanca Square" - try and think of it as Hobart's answer to Federation Square in Melbourne. There's a big TV screen and a lot of cafe's, bars and other nifty little shops that front onto the square - one of which was Barcelona.

When I sat down at the table a parma was the furthest thing on my mind. I had my sights set on bacon. On benedict. On some form of egg and meat combo that would make the hurting stop ... then my eyes fell on this portion of the menu -

It was after 11 so we had moved into both breakfast and lunch menu territory. I looked at the breakfast menu, then back at the schnitzel, back at brekky, back at schnitzel. What better meal than the food of foods to save me from my hungover hole... I ordered the parma.

Now, Cafe's in Hobart seem to operate on their own concept of time. Nothing is in a hurry, if you order a coffee - be prepared to wait ten minutes while they lazily cobble it together while chatting with the locals about their Sunday arvo plans. This parma took a while to come out (an apple juice and a half, and there was a sizeable delay between juices). But it eventually fell to the table -

It looked impressive! The tiny stack on the middle of a massive plate was certainly a unique way of presenting a parma - sure the schnitzel was a little small in circumference, but size isn't everything (at least that's what my wife keeps telling me).

It was hard to cut into without squishing the mash further down, but I managed. My suspicions were correct about the chicken quality - it was pure white, fresh and damn juicy. The toppings were fresh and delicious - I would have loved a slice of ham (or more unsolicited salami) but it wasn't meant to be.

It was a small parma, but it hit the spot. I wasn't a wrap for the sides however. Broccolini has no place under a parma and the mash ... for mash, it was okay. But chips are a classic side and I would have much preferred some chippies over a pile of mash. If you're gonna give me mash, give it as well as chips, not instead of.

We sat at Barcelona for a little while longer to collect ourselves. One more apple juice and I was ready to face the day - So the parma did help with the hangover.

If I went back to Barcelona I would definitely give the parma another shot - I would just make sure to consult the menu for a side order of chips.

PARMA #5 - THE LOFT

Sunday afternoon. The parents of the Bride threw a lovely BBQ for us to get together and reflect on the night previous (as well as indulge in a little 'hair of the dog'). The plan at the time was to have lunch there, then whoever was still left in town could meet up at The Brunswick that night and we could finally try that famous parma. I was sitting on a chair in the corner discussing it, We were going to arrive at around 4 in the afternoon, and our group was going to be half the size that it would have been on Friday night - so surely we wouldn't have a problem getting a table. But just in case, I was gonna call in a booking.

I grabbed my phone and visited their website. Then I saw it. The Brunswick's opening hours.

Closed Sunday.

I was heartbroken - Our flight out the next morning was far too early, there was no way we could get it in time. To make things worse I had a room full of hungry parma goers pumped to try "Australia's Best Parma" ... What could I do? Then it hit me ... The Loft!

At the start of last year I took a family trip to Hobart, and one of the places we stopped for dinner was The Loft, a restaurant located within Wrest Point Casino in Hobart. At the time I didn't have much expectations for the food, but I ordered the parma anyway. When it came out then, It looked like this -

At the time I was blown away. It was absolutely massive - sure it had slight nudity issues, but the areas that had topping on them were bigger than some parmas we've had - I loved it, and always wanted to come back and give it the official treatment as I considered it easily in the top 15 parmas I'd ever had... I guess now was the time! So I spread the word. Parmas at the Loft. We arrived that evening, took our table and spied the menu

It was unchanged - appearing on the menu exactly as it did a year previous. I was pumped, everyone was pumped. We placed our orders and waited with baited breath for the food to arrive.

Oh. No.

Look at the picture a year previous, then look at this mess. Complete downgrade, and everyone at the table's was the same. Processed schnitzel. Canned toppings. No ham. Rubber cheese that looked as if it had been under the heatlamps for an hour... and the worst part, the price was unchanged. We had just paid $26 for the privilege of eating this turd of a parma. I'm writing this review three days after eating it and I'm still getting worked up just remembering it.

Absolutely horrible.

The chips were dry, wrinkled and unseasoned. If we hadn't ordered them 5 minutes after the restaurant opened I'd be convinced they had been sitting in a bowl for hours. Although they were open for lunch, so perhaps we just got the leftovers from the lunch shift.

Salad wasn't much better. Almost green cherry tomatoes, everything else looked like the offcuts of a proper salad doused in far too much dressing

I think I was most upset about this one because I know that it used to be good. What the hell happened in the last year that caused them to turn their parma so shitty - In the time since I first ate the parma at The Loft I have recommended it to a heap of people, talking it up as one of the best parmas I have ever had. If you were one of those people I am so, so sorry.

If I had to choose one parma from the trip as my favourite I'd have to say it was The Shippies. That pub is all round class with a great parma to boot. In a dream world I could play Frankenstein and take the parma from the Shippies (with the crumbs from Irish Murphy's), the chips from the Shamrock and the presentation from Barcelona to create my perfect Hobart parma. Then I'd leave the loft in the garbage to rot. Rot and die.

Well I hope you enjoyed this little parma tour of Hobart! I posted a ton of photos to Instagram on the way, so check that out if you're keen. I know it sucks that we didn't make it to The Brunswick, but it's on our list - next time we can nab a cheap Jetstar flight we'll be there to give it a crack.

Back to our regularly scheduled programming this week! We'll be back with a new Melbourne-based review this Friday. Same parma-time, Same parma-channel.

Special Attempt - 'Red Rooster Parmy Schnitzel Meal'

March 1, 2014

Alright, this is just a quickie update, as I need to get the word out on this thing. It's only 'for a limited time' so its not gonna get a full review, a lot like the KFC Parmy Stacker a few months back.

Now, lets get one thing straight - I love Red Rooster. In my opinion its one of the most under-rated fast food's we have, The chips are consistently fantastic (Unlike KFC's which are all over the shop) and the 'Fully Loaded Pack' is my Sunday morning hangover cure of choice.

But yesterday afternoon this was brought to my attention on Twitter...

Good lord. You know you're in trouble when the professionally photographed photo of the thing looks like the worst thing I've ever seen.

But I had to do it, I had to take one for the team - I've got an obligation to try these things so that you guys don't have to. I went into my local Reddy Red and there it was, in the middle of the menu board...

$8.99 for the Parmy meal, with a choice of mash or chips (I went with chips) and the option to add a second schnitzel for $3.49 ... this struck me as odd at the time, but would realise why later on.

A few minutes later I received my meal and ran it home in my hot little hands, I opened it up and ... um... yeah.

So at first glance there wasn't actually any chicken visible, only chips, peas and a pile of semi-melted cheese. somehow the cheese seemed to be on top of the peas and chips, with the schnitzel underneath.

To get a better look I separated all the elements out on a plate ...

I think the picture says it all really. I don't even think this qualifies as a parma. First all. There were peas everywhere. The cheese on top of the parma was more pea than it was cheese. The "Schnitzel" was nothing more than a Red Rooster burger patty. The need for the option to "add a schnitzel" for $3.50 became painstakingly clear - they know how bad it is, so they are giving you an option to make it slightly less awful.

There may have been some napoli on it at some point in a previous life, maybe the chicken had brushed up against a tomato as it was walking around the farm, but that was it. I was in shock... how could they think that this would work? An utter insult to parma lovers everywhere.

There isn't much more to say. Don't waste your money on this abomination, I'm putting this review up as a public service announcement for people who are thinking "how bad could it be?" Trust me, whatever you're imagining, it's worse.

Chips were pretty good though.

2013 Parma of the year awards

December 6, 2013

Another year has passed in the search for the perfect parma, which means the time has come to hand out some golden chooks! We did things a little differently this year, rather than have just the one trophy we split the dazey up into two categories. Best New Parma and Parma of the Year.

Lets get started!

Best new parma

The "Best new parma" dazey is awarded to the best parma we have found in the last twelve months of parma reviews. We have consumed over 40 parmas since Taco Bill in January (not including special events) and this parma stands out amongst the rest as the best we tried in 2013.

The envelope, please.

This years Best new Parma award goes to...

The Duke

When we discovered The Duke back in May this year it was just a baby, having only been open for just over a month, but it managed to leave a lasting impression. Not only is The Duke an amazingly well fit out pub with a fantastic atmosphere, the food is absolutely phenomenal.

The parma is amazing. Fresh, real chicken, gorgeous crispy crumbs, the list goes on ... If you want to hear me gush about this parma some more check out the original review here.

But it gets better! I've been back to The Duke a few times since May for a meal (it has quickly become one of my favourite spots in the city to grab a beer and a good feed) and they have done a bit of tinkering with their parma. Check out this picture of the parma I snapped on a recent visit -

The garden salad is gone! replaced with a very hearty serve of coleslaw. The Salad at the Duke when we first reviewed it was it's biggest downfall, it wasn't bad at all, but it wasn't exciting - there's only so much you can do with a garden salad. The coleslaw, however, is definitely a change for the better.

Oh, and if you happen to go temporarily insane at The Duke and decide you don't want a parma (madness), the other items on the menu are damn good too. I can recommend the mexican chicken burger in particular. If you can handle a bit of spice this is bloody good.

So congratulations to The Duke. An amazing pub with terrific atmosphere and a parma that you'd be hard pressed to walk away from disappointed. Well done guys!

Parma of the Year

This is the big one! The award we give out to the best parma we have had on our journey thus far. There's really no point in building up the suspense too much as if you click over to the "Ladder" the winner has been listed there for over a year. You know who they are, but what the hell

Drumroll please...

The Imperial Hotel

What can I say about the Impy that hasn't already been said here, here or here! ... A bit, actually! Even though they took out our Parma of the Year in 2012 the Imperial has not rested on its laurels, striving to improve what was already the best parma we have had so far.

We have a rule at Parma Daze that if a pub, once reviewed, works hard to improve what they have served us then they are eligible for a redo. After the effort that The Imperial has put in to improve their parma since we first tried it in August 2012 we figure its only fair that they are also eligible for a redo. So not only did we present The Impy with their parma of the year trophy, this post will also serve as the Redux for the Imperial Hotel (don't ask me why we call a redo a "redux" I got it from the Apocalypse Now directors cut and now it has become a thing).

So what has changed? We ordered our parmas and awaited their arrival. Shoutout to the table of 20+ blokes there last night celebrating the last parma of their work's "Parma Club" for the year - You chose a great pub to finish things off!

Our parmas arrived.

The parma itself remains pretty much the same. Mammoth hand crumbed schnitzel, lashings of ham, perfectly golden brown cheese, I've said this all before so if you want more detailed info on the parma check it out here and here.

Now, here is where we get into the big changes, first up - the chips.

The Impy's chips were never bad, but much like the old salad at the Duke there's only so much you can with regular steak fries... But they've had an upgrade.

Beer battered chips! The king of chips, these beauties have a golden crunch and are perfectly seasoned. We were brought out some sauce pots to accompany the chips but to be honest they didn't need them, these chips were just fine without dipping.

Next up, The salad. Also had a revamp since the first time, although I think we covered this in the Parma of the Year 2012 review...

How could you make a garden salad infinitely tastier, while at the same time removing any redeeming nutritional value? By covering it with cheese of course!

The Imperial salad is layered with a heap of freshly shaved parmesan cheese, which definitely takes it to another level.

The Impy's parma isn't perfect (the salad could use a bit more dressing and the parma itself has, on occasion, been a little light on the napoli) but its damn close.

Oh, Also worth mentioning, that (as it is December) the Imperial's "Christmas Parma" is on the menu for this month only, so if you head down in December you're going to have a decision to make. They're both fantastic, but in different ways.

I've said it before, but we judge a parmas "value" score on the question "Would I be happy to come back to this pub and pay what I paid for this parma again". I'd be happy to pay what this parma costs, along with airfare to get to Melbourne from wherever I was in the world. Yes its pricey compared to other parmas, but you pay for quality and I'd have absolutely zero qualms shelling out another $25 for The Imperial's parma.

They had the best, yet managed to improve on it. The well deserved updated scores for The Imperial Hotel are as follows -

Parma - 9.25

Chips - 9.25

Salad - 8.17

Value - 9.25

Total - 9.03

After dinner we headed around to the front bar and presented the Imperial Hotel with their award...

Back to back champions! Well deserved guys. Congratulations.

And that wraps it up for another year of Parma Daze parma reviews! We are taking a couple of weeks off and will be back in early January to kick things off again. There are still a lot more parmas out there (seriously. my "parmas to try" list is currently over 100 parmas long and growing daily) and we wont stop until we get to them all.

Massive thanks to the review team, I put the words on the screen but I couldn't do it without the support of you guys. Not to mention a super-awesome-mega thanks to the readers! The fact that there are people out mad enough to follow my ramblings gets me up in the morning, so again, Thanks.

And that about wraps it up for '13! Be sure to stay tuned, we've got a lot of awesome stuff on the boiler for next year, and their might even be a little non-review update on the site some time around the end of December, make sure you follow one of our social media things for a heads up.

It's been a great year and, as always, The search continues...

Special Attempt - 'The Laurel Hotel Mega Parma Challenge'

September 6, 2013

Where? - The Laurel Hotel, 289 Mount Alexander Road, Ascot Vale

Price? - $40 (for mega-parma, chips, salad and pint)

Website? - http://www.laurelhotel.com.au/

Reviewers – Cale, Dale, Lee, Nikki, Stefo

A few weeks ago it came to our attention that there was a new parma eating challenge in town. But this one was different to some of the others we have tried in the past - This challenge was offering a pretty substantial prize...

A years worth of free parmas to the person who downs this bird the fastest. Thats a spicy meat-a-ball!

We had visited The Laurel in the past, way back in 2010 it was the seventeenth parma we did, Now this week's challenge isn't about taste, so if you want a review of the regular parma I think the one linked there still holds up (although it looks like they've altered the chips since the last time we had it).

When I finished work on Thursday afternoon I was cocky, I was confident, I thought it would be a breeze! Feeling a bit peckish I made myself a vegemite sandwich to hold me over until 7 o'clock. It was a different time... so young and naive.

We arrived at The Laurel and took our seats, Four of us (Myself, Cale, Stefo and Dale) went for the Mega-Parma challenge, while reviewer Nikki did the sensible thing and got the regular parma. We were chatting to the chef afterwards and he said that the standard Laurel parma comes in at about 300g of chicken. The mega-parma is 1.5kg of chicken - For those terrible at math that means that a single mega-parma has the same amount of chicken as five standard parmas. We placed our orders and waited.

First thing to arrive was our assigned number -

Along with a form to fill out with our details, as well as an explaination of the rules (No getting up, no sharing, no hiding food, must finish parma, chips, salad and pint to be eligible, etc. etc. etc.) as well as a liability waiver if our stomach explodes after consumption. I was starting to get nervous at this point.

Before I show you the Mega-Parma, I'll show you the Laurels regular parma, purely for size comparison, This is what Reviewer Nikki was delivered...

This is what we got...

Its hard to comprehend just through pictures how big this bastard is. Thats a steak knife to the right, hopefully that can give you a little bit of perspective. It was big, that's all I will say. Underneath the parma was a healthy layer of chips, the salad was just a couple of lettuce leaves, good to break up the massive onslaught of chicken I was about to unleash on my body, but small enough to be insignificant in terms of stomach real-estate.

Cale, Stefo and Dale ready to go. This photo kind've puts them in perspective. It's bigger than Dale's head

The waitress came over, collected out waivers and set up four stop watches. We asked how quickly we had to eat it to make it onto the leaderboard, she said the current fastest time is 7 minutes and 30 seconds, completed by professional eater and friend of Parma Daze Hungry Haydo - This man is a champion of food consumption, you can check out his YouTube channel here. After 7:30 the times really open up - At the time of writing this to be in the top 6 and get into the finals you need to have a time of less than 28 minutes. That was enough to give me hope. I could do this. I could do this. I shouldn't have eaten that sandwich. I could do this.

The stopwatch starts at the time of the first bite. Ready? Go.

It was so. much. chicken.

My strategy was to go fast, be done before my stomach knows that its full - I've heard that works. So I hoed in. On cutting in I realised something, this parma wasn't only huge - it was thick. Fluctuating throughout the parma, of course - but there were plenty of areas that cracked the inch thickness mark.

The first few mouthfuls flew, but by about forkfull eight or nine I started to slow. This was gonna be harder than I thought, not just because I was getting full, but the constant onslaught of chicken after chicken started to get to me. I switched it up, a sip of the pint, a couple of chips, a bit of salad, then chicken. This kept me going for a while as it broke up the monotony a little, this worked for a while but then I realised my mistake - the pint.

Water would have been fine, but the carbonated pint brought on the burps, and when you're trying to focus to put as much stuff in to your stomach as possible the last thing you want is having to stop and let air out.

I kept my eyes on the time, When the 7 minutes and 30 second mark (the current time to beat) ticked past I was about a quarter of the way through and already feeling quite full, It was around this time that It dawned on me that I wasn't going to finish. I slowed up, snacked on some chips, and kept at it.

By twelve minutes I was done. Admitting defeat I wiped my mouth and threw the napkin on top of the parma (the universal sign for 'get this fucking food away from me')

At the end my plate looked like this -

There was still a full parma there, at least.

As for the cross section, I sliced what I had left down the middle (down the shortest edge) and put a fork on top for perspective , you can see the layer of chips beneath and the multi-layers of ham on top, this wasn't the thickest section of the schnitzel either - It got much thicker in other areas.

Slowly but surely, Cale and Stefo admitted defeat. Yet hope was not lost - Reviewer Dale was still going strong, He was our last hope ... Could he complete the challenge and save our dignity?

He pushed on, slowly but surely he worked his way through the parma. He had probably half-a-parma to go (around the 30 minute mark) by this point when he could take no more. Dale through in the napkin and we all admitted we were beaten.

So close... yet so far.

Reviewer Nikki couldn't even finish her regular sized parma, probably for the best that she didn't try the challenge.

If you reckon you can take it on, I'd say give it a go... You'll feel terrible for a few hours afterwards and you'll probably shit the bed, but definitely give it a go. The $40 entry fee covers the parma, chips, salad and pint - thats a pretty good deal considering the amount of food you're getting.

If you want to give it a go yourself the competition is open until the 21st of December, Although I'd advise not leaving it till the last day as the finals are being held on the 22nd of December (you won't have to shell out another $40 for the finals, if you make it into the top 6 the finals are a freebie). Full details at The Laurel's Website. A years worth of free parmas is a great incentive.

If you wind up trying the challenge yourself, be sure to tweet us with your victory photo and thoughts on how it went! I'm curious to see everyone else's experience.

At the time I regretted it, but I'm glad I did it. I'd recommend going and trying it out, or at least convincing your mate to give it a go and laughing at his pain, as all good mates do.

I really shouldn't have had that sandwich.

The search continues...

Special Attempt - 'Subway Chicken Parmigiana Melt'

August 10, 2013

According to my itinerary, at the time this post goes live I will be in California, either on my way to Disneyland or driving between LA and San Francisco. I bet the parmas suck.

If you read last week's post you know the drill, I'm out of town for 3 weeks and I'm banking these posts ahead of time so you, faithful reader, aren't left in the cold while I'm off on an international jaunt with a hefty chunk of the review team. So I'm not wasting one of Melbourne's fine parma-producing institutions on a half-arsed quicky review I'm taking this opportunity to check out the "kind've parmas", the ones not deserving of a fully-fledged parma review yet at the same time shouldn't be completely ignored.

Which brings us to Subway.

[youtube id="Je0W5-p9Hh4" width="580" height="337"]

As the commercial above states, these days the Subway sandwich shop does a chicken parma sub. Now I'll say from the get-go that, although I love a bit of Subway, I've never been a fan of chicken parma sandwiches - something about the mixture of napoli sauce and bread just doesn't go together properly. But hey, the commercial looks good, lets give it a go.

I entered the empty store at about 6pm (I've always considered Subway a lunch food and not a dinner food, so that doesn't really surprise me) Everyone who visits Subway regularly has their standard ordering procedure locked into their brain. They know what they like and how to order it (Italian herbs & cheese bread, chicken fillet, lettuce, onion, olives, jalapenos and ranch sauce with salt & pepper) So I can't actually remember the last time I looked at the menu - standing there, looking like a complete Subway n00b, I spotted the "Chicken Parmigiana Melt" and approached the sandwich construction station.

Seeing as I was inspired by the commercial, I tried to keep my order as close to what the guy in the ad has possible. Starting with a 6-inch Italian herbs and cheese base I shuffled down the line. The first thing that struck me was that a different chicken fillet is used for the parma than a regular subway chicken fillet - I was completely unaware that Subway stocked chicken schnitzels these days - but like I said, I rarely look beyond my standard order. This was a bit of a disappointment, as I love Subway's chicken fillets - but I didn't want to deviate too far off menu, so I stuck with what she gave me.

Chicken fillet, cheddar cheese, napoli (or marinara sauce, as apparently we're American) toasted.

Hold on... Where's the melt? My 'Chicken parmigiana melt' had no mozzarella on it, nor was I asked if I wanted mozzarella - When asked if I wanted cheese, I said yes, she responded "Cheddar, Old English or Swiss" I chose cheddar and just assumed that, as I ordered a chicken parmigiana melt that the mozzarella cheese was kind've a given. I didn't notice until it was out of the toaster that there was no mozzarella - oh well, Moving on to salads.

Again, keeping with the commercial I kept it simple - Lettuce, onion, cucumber and olives (in the ad they had tomato slices as well, but I'm not a fan of raw tomato so I omitted it from my "interpretation").

No extra sauce on top other than the napoli, a bit of salt & pepper and I was done! out the door with my freshly toasted chicken parma sub - In & out the door in about 4 minutes flat, a good turnaround time if this turns out to be a decent sandwich.

Wrapped up tightly

I got it home and began the photoshoot, Unwrapping it revealed the napoli had leaked quite a bit, leaving quite the mess on the paper...

photo (12) The finished product

I'm not sure how long it was under the toaster, but it can't have been more than twenty seconds - hardly enough time to melt anything, however it was still quite warm, even after the 3 minute trip from Subway to my Apartment.

For research purposes I deconstructed the sandwich to get a proper look at what we were dealing with...

The layers of the sub, salad-wise it was a bit sparse down one end and packed on the other, with no regard for proper salad distribution! (gosh!)

Two slices of ham, a squirt of napoli, not a lot of cheese, a surprisingly large schnitzel fillet and some very poorly distributed salad. That's what we are working with here. I closed her up, sliced it in half for the below cross section photo, and tucked in.

It actually doesn't look too bad from this pic

I was quite surprised with how thick the schnitzel fillet was, but that's about where the positives end - Processed to the max, it had the consistency of a giant frozen chicken nugget that has spent 2 minutes in the microwave. It didn't taste particularly bad at all, but even compared to the regular subway chicken fillet the schnitzel is about as tasty as a moist sponge. Speaking of sponges - I have no idea where the napoli went. Other than a red tinge to the top of the schnitz there was no sauce to be found, it had all soaked into either the crumbs below or the bread on top, either that or ... Ya know ...

The ham was tasteless, the cheese was tasteless (I should've gone with old english or swiss, cheddar is just boring) and the schnitz was tasteless - when the most interesting flavour in the sandwich is the cucumber you know you're in trouble.

Actually, I can't really fault them on the salad - the lettuce, cucumber and onion were all crisp and fresh, and when I got to the end where all the olives were they actually tasted pretty good.

The Subway chicken parma sub is a whole lot of nothing. Tasteless processed meats stacked atop each other and squished into bread - If you swapped out the spongey schnitzels for the infinitely tastier chicken fillets and added some bolder flavours (come at me, jalepenos) then it'd be salvageable - I suppose that's the good thing about Subway - if you don't like it you're free to change it!

Things should be back to normal next week, No more take-away parmas, we'll be back in the saddle with a fully-fledged parma review!

Special Attempt - 'Four n Twenty chicken parma pie'

August 3, 2013

I am typing this on Sunday the 23rd of June, if all goes to plan you will be reading it sometime towards the end of July - How is the future going? have we got those flying cars that fold into suitcases like on the Jetsons? That'd be awesome...

I'm hoping future me has already covered this on the Facebook or Twitter, but the reason I'm doing this is that for 3 weeks from late July to early August I'll be on holiday in the United States (tasting the best parmas our neighbours to the north have to offer, no doubt) So instead of regular reviews things are gonna be slightly different for the next couple of updates. I'm writing this review early and banking it for upload later.

I first heard about the Four N' Twenty parma pie around July last year, when a video surfaced on youtube, which has since been taken down :(

"That'd be on par with the chicken parmi down at the pub" says one of the blokes in the video. Hmmm. big call mate! (and I'll be kind and overlook his use of the word "parmi" instead of "parma" ... to each their own.

After seeing that vid I kept my eyes out for the Parma Pie - but to no avail. In the video they seem to be mostly outside the 7-11 on the corner of Bourke & Swanston st, yet every slev I visited in search for the parma pie had their own "Munch" brand of pies, and while I'm sure "munch" pies are tasty in their own right, they're not Four n Twenty. And they don't contain parmas.

After a while I had considered it a lost cause, the parma pie falling into legend - Until recently I noticed the occasional post on Twitter and Instagram of people taking photos of the fabled parma pie. They did exist - but from what I could gather, not in service stations - The Supermarket is where I should have been looking.

This morning I set out on a mission. My plan was to scour this fair city, Hit every 7-11, Shell, Safeway, Coles, IGA and Aldi that I could find until I found the parma pie. I vowed to not return home until I found one, I didn't care if it took me all day.

Luckily, I found them in the first supermarket I went to, Thanks Safeway!

$2.29 RRP or $1.85 with an everyday rewards card. Not too shabby! The first one had a tear in the packaging (as you can see in the photo) so I skipped that one, grabbed three others and headed home.

This is gonna be a picture heavy post - I know it's annoying to only have a sentence or so in between a wall of photos, but you're gonna have to deal with it. Cool? Cool.

The packaging is slightly different than the youtube vid, rather than that crinkly plastic you normally find on pies in a servo, these were in a thicker paper/plastic hybrid - the paper that is designed for microwave use, so that the pie itself doesn't go soggy when it goes 3 minutes in the radiation chamber.

The instructions state to open each end, then microwave for 3 minutes ...

The frozen pie, about to go in the microwave

The finished product

I was a little scared. Would it be any good? Could it be any good? Amazingly I had heard good things about the parma pie, all the mentions on Twitter seemed to cast it in a positive light.

It was bloody hot coming out of the micro, so I let it sit for a couple of minutes before tucking in.

Rather than go in blind, I sliced to pie in half for a cross section, just to see whats going on in there...

Firstly, inside the pie there is a lot of sauce. a combination of napoli and cheese that manages to maintain a temperature hotter than that of molten lava, even after a few minutes posing for photos. Before cracking it open I was curious to see how they would pull off the "schnitzel" portion of a parma pie, and to be honest, their solution is quite ingenious...

Schnitzel balls! These are what make up the chicken in the chicken parma, the pie is full of little balls of chicken schnitz. I managed to extract one for closer examination (I put the coin in to give you some perspective on size...)

Freshly plucked from the pie

Schnitzel ball cross section

First thoughts - Impressed! Four n' Twenty have actually put some thought into how to make a legit parma pie, after the photos were done I tucked in. And instantly burnt my lip ... fucking thing.

But third degree scaldings aside, It was better than I expected. It's not "on par with the chicken parmi at the pub" but their was plenty of napoli and melted cheese throughout. I thought I saw a couple of ham cubes (if they weren't ham cubes I'm clueless as to what they actually were), and the balls of chicken schnitz throughout were pretty good quality (processed, of course, but as good as processed chook can be) .

It's a messy pie to eat, the abundance of sauce and cheese was very "drippy" and left quite a few stains down my shirt by the time I was done - but luckily none of the schnitzel balls got away from me.

I wouldn't trade a proper parma for one of these things, but it was actually a damn tasty pie, and for only $2 it's damn hard to complain - for pocket change (less than a can of coke these days) I can pick up one of these, chuck it in the freezer and, should a parma craving strike unexpectedly, have it ready to go at a moments notice - It would definitely tide me over while on the way to the pub.

The other two remain in my freezer, I imagine they will be the perfect drunken snack when I get home after a night out enjoying a few refreshments. It won't beat a regular parma at the pub, but its definitely worth having around - If you see one on your next trip to the supermarket pick it up - for the price its hard to go wrong.

The search continues...

Special Attempt - 'KFC Parmy Stacker'

July 26, 2013

Things are slightly out of order here, I wrote this review on the 18th of July, as a fill-in upload while I'm overseas for the next three weeks - however I wrote *next* week's review on the 23rd of June, but this one seemed more news-worthy than next week's as its a new burger so I've moved it up in the rotation. Got it? good. If you follow that you should watch Primer. Awesome movie.

I'll start this review by saying I am an absolute sucker for the 'limited time only' special burgers at fast food restaurants. From the El Maco to the Double Down to the Angry Angus - I cannot resist a special edition, and I'll always cave and have a go when the new menu addition rolls around.

So when the "Parmy Stacker" came to my attention I was torn, on one hand it was a special burger, but on the other hand it's a fast food parma burger ... could it possibly be any good? I resisted for a few days - however with my apartment being located no more than 50 metres from the entrance to a KFC my resolve did not last long. I had to bite the bullet. I had to try the Parmy Stacker.

Before I get into the burger experience itself, lets talk about the name. Parmy. Now in the 3 years I've been running this site I have tried my hardest to stay impartial on the whole "Parma vs. Parmy" debate, It's a regional thing - Victorians say Parma more often and South Australians tend to say Parmi with the other states flip-flopping between the two depending who you ask. To be honest I don't care - When it comes down to it what you get on the plate is the same, and I'm really not losing sleep that someone else pronounces a single letter of an abbreviated word different to how I do, It's like kicking up a stink that they call potato cakes "Scallops" in NSW... it just doesn't matter. However when I ordered "The Parmy Stacker" the guy at the counter repeated my order back as a "Parma stacker", which I enjoyed.

Anyway, on to the burger.

If you're heading in for a Parmy Stacker you're gonna be presented with a couple of options...

You can go the single or double schnitzel stack, and for an extra 70c you can add bacon. I was very tempted to go all out and get bacon, but I figured for the first go I'd see how it handles without the pork product, I ordered a large Parmy Stacker meal, with chips and a Mountain Dew.

Sidenote: How good is Mountain Dew? It's clearly the best soft drink on the market and I challenge anyone to try and prove me wrong.

Mountain Dew is the best soda ever made.

It's also worth noting (as you can see from the above menu) that you can swap out a burger from a burger box with a single-stack parma burger for $1 extra.

I ordered, got home, and looked at the burger before me -

It was a sizeable burger, before I unwrapped it it could be easily confused with a whopper, going only from weight and girth. I'd be interested to know if KFC are intending on keeping the parmy around as a permanent menu addition, as they seem to have put a lot of work into the packaging and advertising for the thing, and come to think of it the words 'limited time only' don't seem to appear on any of the posters. Hmm. Could it be here to stay?

I unwrapped the beast and took a couple of shots -

Angle 1 -

Angle 2 -

The schnitzels were well sized for a burger and of decent quality - the processed level was over 9000 but that is to be expected from KFC, yet at the same time probably the best fast-food schnitzel I've seen so far. Before tucking In I sliced it in half to get a good view of the insides via cross section -

Please ignore the action figures and Portal gun in the background... actually, don't ignore the Portal gun. It's awesome.

There's plenty of bird here. Not a whole lot of anything else, but plenty of bird. (lettuce? hello?).

I took a bite and was instantly let down, not by the burger itself, but due to the fact that it was stone cold. look at the cheese, it's not even remotely melted. The time from being handed the bag to taking my first bite was no more than 3 minutes, yet it tasted as if it had been sitting out for 20 minutes going on the temperature. I tried to put this aside and focus only on the taste.

There is heaps of napoli on this thing. Oh, actually, apparently napoli is called "Parmy Sauce" now according to KFC, although that might be a more apt description as it is possibly the sweetest napoli I have ever tasted, Mix some dolmio with a couple of tablespoons of maple syrup and you get the idea.

for processed schnitzel it's not that bad, I would say we've actually had worse with some real life parmas. There was only a dusting of lettuce below the burger, a far cry from the veritable salad on the promo image -

But this isn't my first rodeo, I turned Thirty a couple of weeks ago, I know not to expect anything resembling the promo image on fast food advertising.

The oatmeal bun wasn't terrible, if you've had the classic chicken burger from Hungry Jack's (Arguably the best fast-food chicken burger on the market) you'd know what its like. Like the Parmy Sauce it was quite sweet, but it did its job in getting the parma from the table to my mouth without getting my hands dirty, although it was slightly stale.

It was okay, but the lack of temperature really killed it for me, I ended up finishing the first half then sticking the second half in the microwave in attempt to shock some life into it, which worked reasonably well, there was hardly any lettuce to wilt and the semi-stale bun actually benefitted from 15 seconds in the hot box. I enjoyed the second half much more than I did the first.

All up it was a serviceable porta-parma. Albeit quite bland, if I could be assured it was hot, with a fresh bun and probably the addition of bacon then I could be persuaded to have it again, otherwise I'd probably stick to my standard Bacon & Cheese burger combo.

For $11.95 for a regular combo, more if you want bacon and a large combo, it gets a little pricey for what you actually get. We've had better parma night parmas for cheaper and much, much better.

I got this burger from the Essendon North KFC, and with Georges Hamburgers, Fish & Chips just down the road offering a solid take away parma for under $10 It'd be hard to justify going back to KFC if I had a parma craving.

I wouldn't say run out and get it now, but if you're at KFC getting a burger box then it'd be worth chucking in the extra $1 to switch one of the included burgers to a parmy burger, if only to merely to satisfy your curiosity - it's worth a try.

Attempt #139 - 'Lite n Easy Chicken Parmigiana'

April 26, 2013

[info]

When? - 13th of April, 2013

Where? - The comfort of my own couch.

Price? - $10-ish. A delivery of ten dinners comes to around $100

Website? - http://www.liteneasy.com.au/

Reviewers – Lee[/info]

Something a bit different this week! Our usual parma night is Thursday night, and as ANZAC day fell on the same day I was far too busy imbibing pints to break for a parma, plus getting up at 4am to make the dawn service meant I was in bed by about 7pm. So here is a review I’ve had in the bank for a couple of weeks! Hope you all had a great ANZAC day and to the people who took a sickie today to get a four day weekend, I hate you a little bit.

We shall return to normality next week, until then … Enjoy!

If you haven’t noticed lately, healthy-food-delivery-company Lite N’ Easy have been on a marketing blitz lately, You can’t turn on the TV without hearing about Brisbane Mum Natasha talking about how she has lost 15 kilos in fourteen weeks on the Lite N’ Easy diet.

Wouldn’t you know it, the marketing worked - I signed up a few weeks ago.

Going through the menu for the first delivery I noticed the Chicken Parma. Surely it’s going to be awful. Surely. But curiosity got the best of me and I placed the order. The following week I received my eski of frozen meals and the parma went into the freezer, A couple of days later it was time - I peeled back the lid the recommended 3 centimetres and chucked it in the microwave for 8 minutes.

Now the last (and only) microwaved parma we tried was the McCain’s version, which you can read about here. The difference being when we tried that one, it was Australia Day … For the Lite N’ Easy version I was stone cold sober - So I didn’t think my taste buds would be as forgiving.

The 8 minutes was up, I retrieved the cardboard box, held my breath, and peeled back the lid.

Hmm.

Doesn’t quite look like the photo from the Lite N’ Easy Website. A lot less ‘chips’ for one thing.

But I tucked in. Not really being able to see where the parma ended and the salad/potatoes started, I resolved to eat the sides first, leaving the parma till last. But I’ll get to the sides later. First - The parma…

It was a little small, but for a portion controlled ‘diet’ meal that is to be expected I suppose. I cut into the chicken expecting a thin, grey, soggy excuse for a schnitzel, but you know what? I was actually pleasantly surprised

tumblr_inline_mlu7j15TXT1qz4rgp

It was white meat! and thick! we have had thinner parmas at some pubs. The crumbs were as soggy as you would expect for a parma that had spent 8 minutes in the microwave, but they weren’t too thick. The toppings lacked a lot of flavour, the cheese was barely there however they made the very odd (and unadvertised) choice of putting a layer of béchamel sauce (white sauce) under the slice of ham. It kind of tasted like they had tried to build a lasagne on top of the parma, making a parma/lasagne hybrid. Parmagne™.

There was a slice of ham, but it was napkin thin and carried no flavour, the majority of the flavour in the dish came from the duo of sauces on top.

The chips (aka the two chunks of potato) and the salad (cubed carrot, beans, corn and some cauliflower) were pretty much what you’d expect. Steamed veggies, sure they were okay, but nothing beats some proper pub chips - but to be fair that would completely negate the ‘healthy’ aspect of the dish. Why does everything Lite N’ Easy produce have to be microwaved? Surely they could produce some fantastic and healthy oven-only dishes that didn’t mean everything you ate had the arse steamed out of it.

In the end I wasn’t nearly as offended as I expected to be. The chicken breast, although small, was actually real chicken breast and I would be happy to get it again.

Don’t get me wrong, it doesn’t even compare to a good parma from the pub, however it’s much better than it’s McCain counterpart and it’s good to know that if you’re trying to eat healthy and shed some poundage, there is a passible substitute for a chicken parma out there.

Parma - 5.75

Chips - 1.30

Salad - 3.00

Value - 6.50

Total - 4.46

The search continues…

Special Holiday Attempt - 'The Imperial Christmas Parma'

November 30, 2012

So my original plan was to do the entire review in the form of a re-written version of A Visit from St. Nicholas, but after doing just the first verse I realised how much of a stretch that would be, its a really long poem and I’m already pushing it - shrubs dont stir, even if they are crazy excited.

Last week I received an email from our current No #1 pub, The Imperial Hotel, with some very interesting news - They were launching a new Christmas parma on December 1st and they wanted the Parma Daze team to come and give it a try. We figured it was a perfect time to get a holiday special on the site (plus I’d never turn up the chance for a parma at The Imperial), so we loaded up the Parma-Sleigh and headed back for the first time since our initial review!

The pub hasn’t changed, still as cosy, warm and inviting as ever, As we took our seats in the dining room we had one thing on our minds. The christmas parma. We got our hands on a flyer to see what we were in store for…

We placed our orders and awaited the arrival. A turkey parma? would it be good? how would the cranberries in place of napoli go?

I won’t lie, I was a bit worried, even when we are at a pub with novelty parmas I rarely go any more extreme than a “mexican” so a turkey parma with cranberry sauce is a completely new ballpark.

before long our dishes arrived

It looked… Like a parma! Slightly smaller than the chicken schnitzel but still pretty sizeable. I picked up my knife and fork and cut my first bite.

It was damn good.

As soon as I tried it all of my concerns were out the window - My major worry was that there were a lot of very strong flavours on the dish - any of which could have overpowered the thing, but they all complimented each other fantastically. The brie, the ham, the turkey and the cranberries all worked together amazingly well.

Now, it is different than your regular parma, the sweetness of the cranberries add a completely new flavour, it kind of reminded me of honey or lemon chicken that you get at chinese restaurants, but on a plump, fresh turkey breast.

The chips were the same as last time - still served in a separate bowl to minimize sogginess, keeping them crisp and delicious.

Instead of a salad the Christmas parma is served with a bowl of veggies, I thought this was a fantastic choice, as it rounded out the whole vibe of a hearty turkey dinner. I thought it was a great choice, however some of the opinion around the table was that the option of a garden salad would be nice.

This is gonna be a short review as we covered all the basics of the original Imperial Parma in our first visit. The Christmas Parma is only available in December and I can’t recommend it highly enough, get down to the Imperial and try it while you can!

Okay, that was awful, Note to self, don’t quit day job and become the “Weird Al” of 18th century poetry.

The search continues…

Attempt #100 - 'The Commercial Hotel'

June 13, 2012

[info]

When? – 9/06/2012

Where? – The Commercial Hotel. 65 Grant St. Alexandra

Price? - $23 (unless stated otherwise)

Website? - http://www.commhotel.com.au/

Reviewers – Shanan, Grace, Ben, Ahmad, Pat, Nikki, Lee, Tony, Stefo, Adam, Janet, Ness, Kylie, Cale[/info]

EDIT After closing for a few weeks the Commercial has re-opened with new owners and has re-instated the famous menu of parmas. However word on the grape-vine is that they are not the same as they used to be - Reserving judgement until we can get back up there and give them another go!

EDIT As of the 28/11/2013 The Commercial Hotel has closed its doors and its menu of over 40 parmas is no longer available. You will be missed guys!

Before I begin with the review, I’ll get the initial stuff out of the way.

100 parmas! Holy shit!

The night before the review I was bored and did some calculations - I went through each Parma Daze review and counted how many attendees were at each then added them all together to get the grand total number of chicken parmigiana’s that have been ordered on behalf of Parma Daze. 709. Add the fourteen that were consumed on our hundredth attempt and it brings the total to 723 parmas. Good lord.

Now if you can assume that each parma is one chicken breast, and there are two breasts on a chicken, then that means 361 and a half chickens have given their lives in search for the perfect parma.

Now, A moment of silence to commemorate the fallen…

We have had an amazing time searching for Melbourne’s best parma, and it wouldn’t be possible without a few people that I want to say a quick thanks to -

To the Parma Daze review team! I know it can be a pain in the arse to get to the pubs some weeks, but I couldn’t do it without you guys!

To you! If you are reading this review, I thank you. It’s knowing that someone other than us weirdos cares enough about parmas to read about it every week that keeps us going.

Okay. So with that out of the way, its on to the review!

If you follow the Victorian parma-scene then you probably know about the Commercial hotel. In the two-and-a-bit years we have been running the site it has been suggested to me hundreds of times as ‘The best parma in Australia’, boasting a menu of over 40 different types of parma, it has been on our ‘to do’ list since day one.

We dragged ourselves out of bed bright and early on Saturday morning and headed to Budget rent-a-car. Now, I have mentioned the “Parma Bus” many times, and the first time that I did, I posted a picture that looked like this…

In reality, the parma bus looked more like this…

But we loved it all the same.

We loaded up the 12 seater Bus with 14 occupants (two of which sat on eskis at the back, shhhh!), Pumped ‘Venga Bus’ and began the two hour-ish drive north to Alexandra.

We were pushed for time as a stop at the bottle-o meant that we didn’t get on the road quite as early as I would’ve liked, which meant we only stopped one other time - for a pee break in King Lake.

At about 12:30 we rolled into a very busy Alexandra. Our original plan for parma #100 was to get accommodation in town, stay the night and have multiple parma’s over the long weekend, however due to unfortunate timing, the Alexandra Truck and Ute Show fell on the same weekend, and had the town completely booked out months in advance.

I had never been to Alexandra before, and it is absolutely gorgeous, the perfect country town where you can’t walk 100 meters without passing a different pub.

Alexandra, A beautiful spot.

We found the Commercial, and as we were running half an hour late for our booking, hurried inside. When I spotted this beside the door on the way past I knew we were in the right place.

If you read Parma Daze often, you will know that I am a sucker for a country pub. On entering the Commercial Hotel, I was in heaven. Open fires, countless hidden nooks for drinking and dining, pool tables and those break-open bingo cards, This is a pub that bleeds character, and if the walls could talk I would love to hear some of the stories it could tell.

The staff that greeted us were warm and friendly, even rocking up with two more than we had booked for was no problem at all (we can be a pain in the arse sometimes!) they did absolutely everything they could to make us feel welcome.

But enough of my jibber-jabber. To the parmas!

We took our seats and opened the menu to find three pages of parmas, I tried to take a photo of all the pages but it didn’t turn out quite well enough to post, so I grabbed the below from the pub’s website, just to give you an idea

if this is too small to read properly, click here for the full version

As usual, when it comes to places with novelty parma options, I went with the Traditional, as did a few others in our group, everyone else mixed it up a little so we got an idea of the full spectrum of what was available.

To kill time, while we waited the group took turns kicking ass on the claw-grabbing-candy-machine. We won so much chocolate, there is still heaps left over, if anyone wants any email me and I’ll send you some.

Then, the grand moment arrived, and our 100th parma hit the table -

The Traditional

And for the sake of completeness, I got the other reviewers to send me a photo of their parma -

The Hawaiian

The Obama Parma

The Mexican

The Slightly Nutty (Veggie Parma)

The Fun Guy

The Nacho Parma

For the hundredth time, we picked up our knives and forks, and dug in.

When I first saw the parma my initial thought was that it looked a little small - my initial thought was dead wrong. although small in circumference, the Commercial’s schnitzel is thick pure chicken breast, that hasn’t been pounded flat, and thus retains a heap of moisture, leaving a very juicy breast indeed.

The crumbs are fantastic, home made and not applied too liberally. There was plenty of freshly shaved ham, a heaping of cheese and a very tasty home made napoli that made this a fantastic piece of chicken, however something was missing. looking around the table and hearing the comments from the other reviewers, I couldn’t help but regret ordering the traditional parma and not going for one of the novelty options.

Normally when a pub offers novelty options for their parmas is it to hide the fact that their standalone parma simply doesn’t cut it. This is not the case with the Commercial hotel, the traditional parma is fantastic, one of the best I have ever had, but it fell just short of the mark of perfect. If I had to give a criticism I would say that the ham and cheese, while in abundant supply, were slightly tasteless, and the traditional parma was not the flavour explosion you would expect a number #1 parma to be.

It’s hard to convey tone when criticizing a parma via text, the Commercial hotel’s parma is absolutely fantastic, and if it weren’t a four hour round trip to get one, I would be here on a weekly basis!

The word from the novelty goers on the table varied, but that is usually the case when there is such a wide variety on offer, a few of the people who tried a novelty parma also had a taste of the traditional, and we came to the consensus that, although great, the special toppings are the way to go.

[youtube id="8c8ODbFAEMw" width="580" height="337"]

The chips were a delight- plenty of them, beer battered and cooked to perfection, they were slightly unseasoned, but a tabletop salt shaker made short work of that. A fantastic offering that could’ve only been improved by some table-top tomato sauce!

The garden salad on the table was one of the best examples we have come across, overloaded with lettuce, tomato, carrot, cucumber, lettuce & onion, and topped with a thick dressing that I can best describe as balsamic mixed with barbeque sauce. It was a flavour explosion that even the most devout salad-haters in our group enjoyed.

Lots of quotes this week. I’ve put the type of parma had beside the quoter’s name, to get a better idea of what was had.

Its obvious the Commercial hotel takes great pride in their parma. It’s clearly a labour of love for them and it has paid off in spades, the TV screens in the bistro run a constant slideshow of the different options available, on the way out there is a board devoted to newspaper clippings about their food. Finding out that a portion of the profits for the parmas goes to leukemia research is just icing on the cake

As for specials, they run $15 parma Thursdays, which is a great deal, there is also a Parma Loyalty Card available that offers your 8th and 16th parma half price, and a freebie when you get to 24.

Oh, and if you eat all 40 parmas on the menu, you get a T-shirt. I want that T-shirt!.

We hung around for awhile after eating, played some pool and I picked up my new favourite stubby holder -

We said goodbye to the Commercial Hotel and headed back to Melbourne, doing a pub crawl on the way home through some of the greatest pubs I have been to in quite some time. A shoutout goes to the Shamrock Hotel (Alexandra), The Molesworth Hotel (Molesworth), The Yarck Hotel (Yarck), The Country Club Hotel (Yea) and the Royal Mail Hotel (Whittlesea) for keeping us entertained on the drive home, And yes, we will be back one day to try all your parmas as well.

Does the Commercial Hotel deserve all the hype? For sure.

Is it worth the drive to Alexandra just for a parma? Definitely.

Is the search still on for the perfect parma? Absolutely.

We’ve already downed 361 and a half chickens. Let that be a warning for all the other chooks in Australia…

We’re coming for you.

Parma - 8.01

Chips - 8.07

Salad - 8.04

Value - 8.00

Total - 8.06

The search continues…

Special Attempt - 'Hotel Albion Man Vs. Parma Challenge'

September 30, 2010

Regular readers will remember our review of the parma at the Hotel Albion, Where a few of our dedicated review team attempted to finish the Albion’s “Grandeoso Parma Challenge” of a double stacked parma with chips and salad, on that first night everyone who attempted the Grandeoso finished it, we spun the prize wheel and walked away victorious.

The Hotel Albion has been one of Parma Daze’s biggest supporters since we put up our review, going as far as linking our review on their pubs website, So when I saw an article in the Herald Sun a few weeks ago saying that the Albion had a new challenge - a ‘Man vs. Parma’ Triple stacked parma challenge, I knew Parma Daze had to step up and give it a go.

Before we get started, Here is a scan of part of that article, where they show the nutritional value for the triple stack -

Ouch! The article goes on to say that the stack itself comes to about 2 kilograms of chicken, not including the chips and salad. The double alone nearly killed me so lets see how we went on the triple parma challenge.

Of a table of about 15 guests only three had the cojones to order the triple - Myself, Adam Y and newcomer Nat. A few other attendees got various varieties of double and a couple of singles were served up as well, After a relatively short wait the monster arrived and was slammed down in front of me. It was a monster.

Below are three photos - one for each layer of this behemoth

2 Different angles and a cross section, hopefully this will properly convey the size of this beast.

This is normally the part of the review where I describe the quality and taste of the parma - but when you are dealing with a challenge of this magnitude taste isn’t really a factor. I picked up my knife & fork and tucked in, making sure not to drink too much or too little, eating as fast as I could to beat my brain’s hunger mechanism and trying to trick myself into thinking I could still eat - but alas when you are stuffing that much chicken down your throat no trick will help you, by about the halfway mark I was starting to enter struggletown. I stopped for a breather, drank a few sips of beer, finished my chips and my salad (they had to be finished for the challenge to be complete) and continued with the parma, But I couldn’t do it - with sweat pouring down my brow my hands were starting to tremble as each bite came up to my mouth - I slowly worked on for as long as I could, but when my body’s swallow mechanism simply stopped functioning I had to throw in the towel (or napkin, as it were)

I’m sorry, gentle readers, I have failed you.

With about a quarter of my meal remaining I had to call it quits for my own health. I even attempted cutting it all up into bite size portions so I wouldn’t have to focus on anything but eating, unfortunately all that did was spread the parma further around the plate, giving me insight as to how much I actually had left and how hopeless my struggle was. I was beaten. I am sorry. I had failed.

But this story is not without a happy ending - as my two other Man Vs. Parma challengers were still going strong. There were a couple of near spews and the waitresses even brought ice buckets to them in case of emergency but Great Scott … they did it.

Ladies and Gentlemen, I present to you Adam and Nathaniel - the first and only two people in history to complete the Man vs. Parma Challenge.

And what good would a ‘before’ shot be without an ‘after’ shot!

Those boys really don’t look too well!

I welcome any challengers to come and attempt to do what those boys did - but be warned, it isn’t an easy undertaking! at $47 its a pricey attempt at glory, but well worth it.

This weeks review was more about the challenge itself and not the score, if you’d like to see a less insane review of the Albion please feel free to check out our last attempt. I hope you enjoyed this special edition of Parma Daze, we will be back to regular reviews next week. So stay tuned!

The search continues…

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The search continues...

The search continues...

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PARMA #3 - THE BEACH HOTEL

The search continues...

PARMA #1 - THE SHIPWRIGHT'S ARMS

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Parma - 9.25

Chips - 9.25

Salad - 8.17

Value - 9.25

Total - 9.03

The search continues...

Parma - 5.75

Chips - 1.30

Salad - 3.00

Value - 6.50

Total - 4.46

**EDIT** After closing for a few weeks the Commercial has re-opened with new owners and has re-instated the famous menu of parmas. However word on the grape-vine is that they are not the same as they used to be - Reserving judgement until we can get back up there and give them another go!

**EDIT** As of the 28/11/2013 The Commercial Hotel has closed its doors and its menu of over 40 parmas is no longer available. You will be missed guys!

Parma - 8.01

Chips - 8.07

Salad - 8.04

Value - 8.00

Total - 8.06

EDIT After closing for a few weeks the Commercial has re-opened with new owners and has re-instated the famous menu of parmas. However word on the grape-vine is that they are not the same as they used to be - Reserving judgement until we can get back up there and give them another go!

EDIT As of the 28/11/2013 The Commercial Hotel has closed its doors and its menu of over 40 parmas is no longer available. You will be missed guys!