Attempt #103 - 'The Beach'


When? – 28/06/2012

Where? – The Beach. 97 Beaconsfield Pde, Albert Park

Price? - $24

Website? -

Reviewers – Cale, Lee, Matt, Nikki, Pat, Stefo, Tony[/info]

The Beach!!!

I’m not 100% sure how The Beach fell on my radar, I think it was a combination of someone suggesting it, not doing a parma down St. Kilda/Albert Park way for a while and remembering The Beach as being a pretty cool pub. Whatever the reason, The Beach (or is it The Beach Hotel? The sign just says “The Beach” so thats what I’m sticking with) was on our radar, we loaded up the parma bus and headed to the beach, to go to The Beach.

Situated on Beaconsfield Pde, The Beach has a fantastic view of (you guessed it) the beach. A few beers here on a clear summer day would be glorious. We entered the pub and met the rest of the review team, who were in the front bar, already polishing off a bowl of chips. Reviewer Stefo commented “If the chips on the parma are as good as the ones we just got, then this is gonna rate well” We took that as a good sign and headed around to the restaurant-side of the bar, took a seat and perused the menu, I got a little worried when I couldn’t see a parma in the “mains” section of the menu, but was quickly relieved when I found it hiding in a separate “Pub Classics” category. Sneaky.

We ordered our seven parmas and kicked back. The Beach is a massive pub, with multiple rooms including a TAB, Pokies, sports bar, restaurant, beer garden, and other rooms for when it gets busier. It was rather quiet at 7pm on a Thursday but it isn’t hard to envision this place when its pumping.

After a schooner of The Beach’s in-house beer, “Beach Lager” our parmas hit the table…

I’ve gotta say, I wasn’t expecting anything great from The Beach. It struck me as one of those sterilized, over-managed pubs that is so popular that they don’t need to care about serving up quality, and are more interested in raking in the cash than providing a good meal. Boy was I glad to be proven wrong.

The schnitzel was a delight, although a little small on the circumference, it was a Thick juicy chicken breast with standard crumbs, cooked to perfection.

The combination of toppings was perfect, with a solid amount of tasty, perfectly cooked cheese. A very healthy dollop of fresh napoli sauce that carried a lot of flavour and a slice of ham that added a delicious smokey twang to the dish.

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As soon as I saw the chips they reminded me of the Bad Boy chips from a recent review, and as predicted by Stefo, they were damn good. There weren’t a lot on the plate, but there didn’t need to be. The thick cut, perfectly cooked fat chips were a splendid accompaniment to the dish, crispy on the outside yet melted in the mouth. The staff even brought around some sauce pots for dipping. Fantastic.

The garden salad was served in a separate bowl, with Lettuce, onion, capsicum, tomato and cucumbers and a creamy dressing on top. it was great to start with, but all the dressing and goodies were on the top alone, and once they were gone all that was left was a bowl of dry lettuce (I think it was summed up best in Stefo’s quote below … He was on the ball this week!)

It was discussed at the table, so I might as well mention it - The Beach is a great “Date Pub”, The menu is swanky enough to impress the ladies, the pub itself its beautiful, the view of the palm trees along the beachfront is amazing, even the female reviewers agreed that this would be a great spot to bring a girl (plus while you are getting your date on you can down a few quality beers and dig in to a parma!)

To my surprise, The Beach fronted a top notch parma. At $24 it is up there on the price scale but I would be happy to pay it again, I’m not sure if they do a cheaper parma night, but to be honest I’d be happy to go back any day of the week.

Parma - 8.57
Chips - 9.43
Salad - 5.71
Value - 7.64
Total - 7.99

The search continues…

The Beach on Urbanspoon