Special Attempt: 'The Birmy Reconsidered'

I have tried it in the past so I’m speaking from experience when I tell you that telling your wife that Valentine’s Day dinner is “parma night at the pub” does not go down as well as one would hope. So last night, rather than heading out for a parma we took a week off and headed out to a non-parma serving restaurant (I know right? why even bother?). Luckily I had a review banked from the Australia Day long weekend for just such an occasion… Enjoy!

Before we get into it, This week we indulged in latest trend of 2019 and launched a ParmaDaze Discord channel, A spot to drop in, hang out and chat about whatever tickles your fancy (mostly parmas, but we are open to other topics). I’m almost always hanging out in there if you’ve ever got a question ask so click here if you want to check it out!

Anyway, on to this week’s review…

I’d be surprised if you haven’t heard yet as I have been broadcasting it pretty relentlessly since the announcement, but this year we presented the Birmingham Hotel in Fitzroy (Or Collingwood, depending on who you ask, Smith Street is literally the border between the two suburbs) with their third consecutive Golden Chook award for best parma in Melbourne.

An impressive feat indeed! Before we discovered The Birmy Melbourne’s Imperial Hotel took out the Golden Chook for four consecutive years, so Birmy has to go unbeaten for another 12 months to hold the title for as long as the Impy did.

Anyway, after the announcement of the Birmy’s third award, Triple M picked up the story and it got a bit of attention…

You can read the full post here if you’d like. After it went live Facebook was ablaze with comments, our traffic surged (if you are a new reader here due to that article, Welcome!) and more eyes than ever were on ParmaDaze. Of course, with added attention comes added criticism, and the Facebook comments weren’t without detractors, claiming that the Birmy no longer deserved the title of number one.

This got me thinking. Our first review (and first scoring) of the Birmy parma was in 2016. I ‘ve stopped in periodically since to make sure things were still up to par but I hadn’t gotten to the Birmy for probably 12 months before we presented them with the 2018 Parma of the Year award.

Was it still good? Or had it done an Impy and dropped in quality?

Luckily as I was in the middle of this existential crisis the Birmingham made an announcement…

$10 Birmy parmas?! How could we not go?

So rather than a full blown redo I decided that we would head down to the Birmy during the Parma Party and just double check that the Birmy Parma was still up to scratch.

We arrived at the Birmy on the Monday, I was expecting throngs of hungry parma goers however the pub was relatively quiet when we arrived, grabbed a seat and placed our orders.

As we sat the pub started to fill, more and more people rolled in the door to get their hands on a feed. The Birmy’s usual parma night goes for $13 so to be able to get one for just $10 was a spectacular deal.

About 20 minutes after ordering our $10 Birmy parmas fell to the table…

Look, I know taste is a subjective thing and what I like may not necessarily be what someone else likes. But I’ll be goddamned if that isn’t the best damn parma going. As soon as I saw it my fears that it had dropped in quality allayed. We picked up our cutlery and tucked in to find that, if anything, the quality of the Birmy parma has improved since 2016, with the addition of a strong garlic flavour throughout the crumbs of the schnitzel

The chips were spot on too, well seasoned, well cooked. Crunchy and soft at the same time. Delightful.

Now this post isn’t going to be entirely sucking up to the Birmy parma. I think it’s just because my tastes have changed but I am just bored with garden salads now. The Birmy’s is fine, but after nearly 10 years of reviewing them I’m just over the garden salad in general. If the Birmy offered up the option of salad or coleslaw I think that would be my dreams coming true.

The fact that we were getting the best parma I had ever tried for only $10 was just ludicrous, $13 on their parma night is just as silly so if you haven’t had one before I urge you to get down to the Birmy and try it for yourself.

Now as I said at the start of the review - The Imperial held on to their top spot for four years before toppling to the Birmingham, and there’s no reason that a better parma can’t come along and take the top spot from the Birmy. So please, keep those suggestions coming in. Either on Facebook, Instagram, our contact page or even as a comment on this review - Let me know if you know of a parma better than the Birmy’s and we’ll check it out.

It has been a few years, there has been some damn stiff competition, there have even been copycats - But for now the Birmy parma remains unbeaten in our eyes. If you haven’t checked it out yet get down there immediately, you won’t be disappointed.

The search continues…

#368 - 'The Corner Hotel Rooftop'

Where - 57 Swan St. Richmond

Price - $24

Website - https://cornerhotel.com

Reviewers – Lee, Matt, Nick, Sakkun, Cynd

I said at the start of our last review that Richmond’s Corner Hotel needed no introduction, and over 6 years later I stand by that statement.

If you haven’t heard of the Corner you must have been living under a rock (or somewhere outside of Melbourne, maybe Adelaide?). It’s one of our cities most prolific live music venues, and if anything its reputation has only grown in the 6 years since we first ventured to Swan Street for a review

Although I am distancing this review from our first visit a little for reasons that will become apparent later. This time around we walked into the building, took a hard right and went straight up to the rooftop, which in the fabled words of Princess Jasmine is a whole new world from what lies below…

As far as rooftop bars go, the Corner Rooftop is spectacular. Heaps of space, a tonne of tables & chairs and options for both covered areas or spots out in the sun depending on the weather/how sunburnt you want to wake up the following day. Without hyperbole I’d call it one of the best rooftop bars in Melbourne.

So, other than our usual Thursday-night-parma-night, this week’s outing took place last Saturday arvo. It was a 30+ degree day so, while we started the day under the sun it quickly became apparent that we would be burnt to a crisp if we stayed out much longer, so we retreated into the undercover area with air conditioning, in front of the bar and adjacent to the kitchen.

By about 1 o’clock the rooftop was starting to get busy, so we checked the menu and spied our target for the day…

Despite the menu description spending an inordinate amount of time itemising the items in the salad and not really mentioning the parma at all, we placed our orders at the bar and waited for our meals to arrive.

The tap list upstairs was relatively fine. 4 Pines, Mountain Goat Steam Ale, Brookvale Union Ginger Beer, Bulmers, Frothy, Melbourne Bitter & Carlton Draught were all on offer. On the way in I noticed that there was Stone & Wood on tap in the downstairs bar, but not upstairs, would have loved to see that one migrate upstairs also.

Just shy of six years earlier (to the day! Sorry I keep bringing that up but I find that coincidence uncanny), the Corner Hotel parma looked like this…

Good god that was a lot of coleslaw!

About 15 minutes after ordering the parmas arrived…

It looked fine on the plate so I picked up the cutlery and tucked in. This is where things went downhill.

First up the schnitzel was cold. The toppings were warm-ish, but the schnitzel itself was stone cold. The schnitty was big enough, it used real chicken, hammered a little bit thinner than I would normally like but real chicken none the less.

The crumbs on the bottom of the parma, however, were mush. completely waterlogged and soggy, all the moisture had been sucked from the schnitzel and absorbed into the crumbs, leaving the chicken completely dry and the crumbs without any semblance of crunch like a wet sponge. With real chicken at its core this had the chance to be a great schnitzel, but due to reasons we would discover shortly, this was a case of extremely squandered potential.

The toppings were also in a pretty sad state. Any napoli that might have been on the parma had been absorbed/evaporated away. What looked like it was once a good coverage and golden brown grill of cheese had separated into an oily, greasy, unpalatable mess.

The ham held up relatively well compared to the other toppings. It had quite a bit of flavour and if it weren’t for the off-putting taste of the cheese might have actually helped elevate this parma quite a bit.

It’s not often that I don’t finish a parma, but I got halfway through this one and couldn’t take any more. As far as the parma goes this one was bordering on inedible for me.

As opposed to the parma the chips were pretty good. Decent serving, well cooked and seasoned, served to the side of the parma and super crunchy. After not being able to finish the parma I was glad to have a decent side of chips to satiate my hunger.

After making such a fuss over the ingredients of the salad on the menu you would think they would make sure we received everything that was listed. Unfortunately the “Bitter leaves with shaved red onion and vinaigrette” was just bitter leaves with some vinaigrette and oil, no onion to be found (some of the other plates had a sliver to two) and overall unenjoyable. Even though there was an unholy amount of it I much preferred the coleslaw we received back in 2013 to 2019’s “bitter leaf” salad.

I hoped it was just me, but the thoughts from the others in the group show that it wasn’t just an isolated incident…

“Parma was thin with extra soggy crumbs, but at least it was real chicken. It wasn’t helped by having powdered cheese and SPC spaghetti sauce instead of napoli. “Salad” was literally a pile of vinegar soaked leaves, which gets a +1 for menu honesty but -10 for being a pile of leaves. The chips were well seasoned & crunchy”

— Nick

“The crumbing was like garden sand and the ham had the consistency of old paint. The leaves tasted fake, and the chips like rubber. By all accounts and evidence I’m lead to believe this was made in a Bunnings workshop, not a kitchen.”

— Sakkun

Normally this is about where we would throw in our napkins, score our meal and walk away. But like I said we weren't at the Corner Rooftop on a usual Thursday night, we were in for a Saturday Arvo sesh, and we settled in for a few post-parma drinks on the lovely rooftop.

As we had moved inside due to the heat our table was situated in such a way that we could see into the kitchen, it afforded us a view into the parma creation process at the Corner and it was about this time things started to make sense - From where we were sitting we could see a tray of pre-cooked parmas (not just pre-cooked schnitzels, pre cooked parmas) with toppings on, just sitting on the bench.

I watched them for 10 minutes, I watched them for 20 minutes, I watched them for 30 minutes, I watched them for 40 minutes.

Then I watched an order for two parmas come through and then, while I watched on with horror, saw the 40 minute old parmas get plated up without being reheated at all (besides a few moments under the heat lamps while they waited to be collected) and the order go out.

Now my cold schnitzel was starting to make sense, as were the soggy crumbs, nonexistent napoli sauce and separated cheese. Shortly after that tray of parmas was finished a new batch of 5 parmas appeared on the bench and the cycle began anew. The Corner Rooftop’s system seems to be to cook 5 parmas at a time and let them sit until an order comes through.

I’m sure the first parma off the tray would have been great. The elements used had the potential to produce a fantastic parma but it was all squandered due to pre-preparation in the interest of saving time, however I wouldn’t have this parma again due to what we experienced.

$24 for this parma is too expensive, that’s pretty high when it comes to a parma and for that price I’d expect my meal to be made to order. They do offer a $20 parma and pot night on Wednesdays alongside trivia, but even then I’d hesitate (although if anything the parma night parmas would probably be better as the turnover would be much higher).

Now you see why I tried to distance the kitchen on the Corner Rooftop from The Corner Downstairs, I’m not 100% sure, but it would make sense if there was a second kitchen Downstairs - Making parmas upstairs and then ferrying them downstairs doesn’t make a whole lot of sense, and Upstairs seemed busy enough without worrying about Downstairs’ orders as well, so fingers crossed that the ones downstairs are better.

Even McDonalds stopped pre-making their burgers years ago. I have heard of pubs pre-cooking their schnitzels and topping/grilling them to order - Not the best practice but I’d prefer that to fully topped & cooked parmas left to just sit there.

Side note - One member of our group ordered the Chicken Tenders from the kids menu in lieu of a parma and was equally displeased, the “tenders” consisting of a sliced up schnitzel, just as dry and unpleasant as the one our parma was built on.

The Corner is a live music institution. It is one of the best bars, best venues and best rooftop pubs I have been to in my life, which is why it absolutely shatters me to review them so poorly. I want this place to serve up a good meal, and if they knock off this pre-preparation garbage I think they have the potential to. Until then, though, I’d give it a miss.

Parma - 2.80

Chips - 6.80

Salad - 2.60

Value - 2.40

Total - 3.48

The search continues...

#367 - 'The Yorkshire Hotel'

Where - 48 Hoddle St. Abbotsford

Price - $24

Website - https://www.theyorkshirehotel.com.au

Reviewers – Lee & Nikki

The Yorkshire Hotel (or the Yorkshire Stingo Hotel, or just “The Stingo” depending on who you ask) has been on our list for quite a while, and to be honest I’m floored that it has taken us nearly 9 years to get to it. Recommended to us multiple times it just kept getting pushed down the ladder (and for a while there I could’ve sworn we already visited). However its time has come, and last night we ventured to Hoddle Street to try out the parma at the Yorkshire Hotel.

A stone’s throw from the MCG this would be a great pub to pop into before the footy (especially if you are a Collingwood supporter as there is Pies merch everywhere). The Stingo manages to retain its old-world corner pub vibe so close to the CBD.

I have seen the Stingo claim to have “Abbotsford’s best beer garden”, and if it weren’t for the fantastic beer garden just opened at the nearby Park Hotel I would have to agree with them… But it’s still pretty damn good. Open and spacious with a pool table, TAB machine and a selection of arcade games (Time Crisis II, Street Fighter, Big Buck Hunter and NBA Jam), it reminded me of one of one of The Great Northern, one of my favourite Melbourne beer gardens.

We ordered at the bar, for the first time this year we weren’t parma-ing in oppressive summer heat so it was a perfect night to make use of the aforementioned beer garden. We pulled up a seat and waited for our meals to arrive.

The tap list at the Stingo surprised me. Got the full gamut here, at the time of writing this review we had (deep breath) Pirate Life IPA, Carlton Draught, Collingwood Draught, Coldstream Golden Ale, Coldstream Cider, Pirate Life Pale, Young Henry’s Newtowner, McCrackens Amber Ale, 4 Pines Summer Ale, Great Northern, Melbourne Bitter and Frothy… Phew. Long story short I’m pretty sure anyone could find a drop they like in that extremely varied tap list.

After a 15-20 minute wait our meals were delivered…

I’m not normally one to complain about parmas stacked on chips. My official position is that 95% of the time it doesn’t bother me, and in the case a parma arrives stacked on the chips any parma pro worth their salt can de-stack before any damage is done (and in the long run I’d rather have more chips stacked than less chips because the plate is too small). However the plate the Stingo used was quite large with a heap of empty space. The chips were rescued before any damage was done, but it boggles my mind that they went the stack with so much extra space that could have been utilised. No points deducted for this or anything as it doesn’t bother me that much, just an observation.

The schnitzel was pretty great quality. Well cooked and juicy. The crumbs were a little thick for my liking but not criminally so. Despite being on a large plate and possibly looking a little small in the photos it was big enough that I didn’t walk away hungry in the slightest. Overall a solid foundation to the parma.

The toppings were quality all round. Plenty of cheese, plenty of napoli and they went the extra step and included a slice of ham. The cheese was well browned and the napoli sauce rich and chunky. I appreciate the inclusion of ham but couldn’t really taste it amongst the other toppings. Something with a bit more oomph would have really brought this parma to life.

As far as chips go these were pretty spot on. A pretty massive serving, well seasoned, served piping hot with a solid crunch, and the offer of tomato sauce or Sriracha on arrival was greatly appreciated.

The salad was … controversial. On its surface it was your standard garden salad. Lettuce, tomato, cucumber and plenty of onion, just how I like it. However the Stingo has decided to also load it with what appears to be pickled fennel? (the yellow stuff you can see in the above photo). It had such a strong flavour that it totally overrode all of the flavours in the salad (and even a bit of the parma). If you like fennel then you’ll probably love this. I was not a fan and would be happier to see it stricken from both the Stingo’s parma and the planet Earth in its entirety.

I’d happily pay $24 for this parma again. It’s a little bit pricey, but I was happy enough with what I received that I’d order it again without question. If you feel like a bargain the Stingo parma is $10 cheaper on Monday night, definitely worth checking out if you’re a local.

Local pubs in the inner suburbs are becoming a rarity, so it’s fantastic to see the Yorkshire still going strong. Its a quaint little pub with an old school vibe and a stellar beer garden that I’d happily drink away the afternoon in. Despite a couple of missteps the parma is overall quite good and definitely worth checking out if you’re in the area.

Parma - 7.60

Chips - 7.00

Salad - 5.00

Value - 7.00

Total -  6.96

The search continues...

#366 - 'Central Club Hotel'

Where - 246 Victoria St. North Melbourne

Price - $20 ($15 Parma & Pot on Tuesdays)

Website - https://centralclubhotel.com.au

Reviewers –Lee & Nikki

During the latter half of last year after watching one too many episodes of Hot Ones on YouTube, I decided to try my hand at making hot sauce. The first batch was a bit of a dumpster fire, but chalk it up to a learning experience. The second batch was much better but still a bit mild (mostly habaneros and jalapeños, nothing crazy hot just yet) . So for the third batch I wanted to go hot... proper hot. I wanted to use some of the hottest chilis known to man, Carolina Reapers.

So during the December break I hopped on a tram and headed in to the Queen Victoria Market. After a bit of browsing I found one stall with what I was after… Reapers aplenty. I grabbed a bagful and was headed home when the Central Club Hotel caught my eye. It looked like it had some work done.

A bit of history - I have wanted to try the Central Club for a while, it looked like a bit of a dive but that has never stopped us in the past, some of our best parmas have been in divey pubs - However pre-renovations the kitchen for the Central Club was only open for lunch and not for dinner, which made it super hard to get out and do a review as 95% of our reviews take place on Thursday after work.

So with a bag of reapers in hand I poked my head into the Central Club. It was a new pub! Completely refitted with a focus on craft beer and tap takeovers. I grabbed a pint and checked the menu, even though the kitchen is now being run by Burgerlove they still made room for a parma on the “Classics” section of the menu. I made a mental note that we needed to check them out ASAP in the new year … which I promptly forgot about until receiving a tweet from a reader reminding me to do so, and last night that is exactly what we did.

Cold beers and lethally hot chilis. A good combination?

We arrived back at the Central Club just after 7 on Thursday and were surprised to find the pub already quite busy. I’m gonna chalk it up to a lot of punters wanting to escape the oppressive heat hitting Melbourne this week, but we almost struggled to find a free table in the front bar when we arrived (luckily we managed to secure one in prime position in front of the aircon when we did)

We grabbed the menu and found our target for the night -

Sounds good to me! A quick trip to the bar to place our order and back to the table to await the arrival of our meal.

The tap list at the Central Club is a thing of beauty. I hesitate to list any beers here as it appears they rotate through taps with great frequency, I’ll just pull this paragraph from their website which should tell you everything you need to know -

“Each month we will be showcasing a different independent craft brewery each month and allowing them to Take-Over our entire pub. As well as giving them as much wall space as they need to brand the sh*t out of the place, we’re giving them 8 out of our 12 taps to pour their entire range for a month.”

— centralclubhotel.com.au

The Central Club touts itself as “North Melbourne’s Best Craft Beer Venue”. Big if true, and to be honest I can’t think of any off the top of my head that would compete. Definitely worth checking out if you enjoy a beer or two.

After about 20 minutes our parmas arrived from the kitchen…

First up, under that mountain of cheese I can assure you that there actually is a schnitzel. I was pleasantly surprised to find real, unprocessed chicken breast.

A little thin in spots and slightly dry, but overall a quality piece of chicken used in the base. The crumbing was super crunchy, maybe slightly overcooked but otherwise fine. a decent foundation for the parma.

I want to say “this parma was all about the cheese” due to the overwhelming avalanche of cheese floated on top, however the napoli sauce was also quite tasty in the Central Club parma as well. Unlike last week’s parma at Kicks which was also insanely cheesy, the Club’s parma had enough napoli that it wasn’t lost in the shuffle. Perhaps slightly heavy handed on the tomato paste, but overall added a great rich flavour to the dish.

The ham was visible but its flavour was all but lost amongst the cheese and napoli. I appreciate that it was there, however it didn’t add much to the dish for me.

I can already hear the complaints of “The parma is on the chips! FAIL!” flooding this review, but to be honest the serving of chips was so damn huge I don’t know where else they could have put them. Massively large portion, well seasoned, my only complaint would be that they were served a little bit cold, but other than that a top notch side to the parma.

The salad was probably the weakest of the three elements on the plate. It was a big serve but felt like a bit of an afterthought. It was fine, but the lettuce was quite wilted and it didn’t bring a whole lot to the party. To be honest I’d prefer it if they swapped out the garden salad for a creamy coleslaw, that would have complimented the parma insanely well.

“Nothing flash but enjoyable for a down to earth parma. Better than last week!”

— Nikki

The parma at the Central Club was fine for what it was, and I think it is priced appropriately. Its a no-frills parma at a no frills price and if you walk in with that mindset I think you’ll be happy with what you get. I’d be happy to shell out another $20 for this one, and their $15 parma & pot night is a fantastic deal if you can get down on a Tuesday.

I enjoyed our trip to the Central Club. Despite renovating into a craft beer focussed pub it has managed to retain its character. Its a welcoming, friendly pub with a great range of beers and a solid feed. It definitely could use some work, but the foundations of a great meal are there. Worth a crack if you’re in the area (especially on a Tuesday) but I wouldn’t go out of my way for it.

Oh, and that third batch of hot sauce turned out great. New business venture? ParmaBlaze™ Hot Sauce coming soon… Maybe

Parma - 7.00

Chips - 7.50 

Salad - 5.75

Value - 7.00

Total - 6.85

The search continues...

#365 - 'Kicks'

Where - 1/450 Elizabeth St. Melbourne

Price - $21.90 original, $22.90 novelty

Website - https://www.kicksmelbourne.com.au

Reviewers – Lee & Nikki

We’re back! The 2018 Golden Chook awards have been distributed (Check them out here if you missed it) and we are geared up to kick off another year in the search for the perfect parma. Incidentally this review marks the 365th parma review we have done at ParmaDaze, meaning we have reviewed enough parmas to be the equivalent to one per day for an entire year. What have I done with my life.

When a pub pops up touting itself as “Melbourne’s finest sports bar” you’d better believe we are gonna take notice, so when we heard about Kicks, up the Queen Vic end of Elizabeth Street, we made sure to make checking it out a priority.

Situated on the second floor above an EzyMart, the large screen TV’s and multiple bars of Kicks are easy to spot from the street below. We arrived at about 7:30 on a Thursday afternoon, were greeted at the door by two bouncers (a bit overkill if you ask me) and ascended the stairs to Kicks.

The vibe of Kicks is a hard one to pin down, it’s kind of a sports bar, but not really. Yes there are TV’s on almost every surface showing a plethora of sports games, but with the pool table, foosball table and three tabletop arcade cabinets it feels considerably more nerdy than your standard sports bar. The best way I can describe it is if The Sporting Globe and GG EZ had a baby, that baby would be Kicks.

With plenty of options for seating (the terrace, the high tables, the pool area, the arcade booths and the large dining area around the back) we pulled up a chair in prime position in front of the bar and checked the menu.

I wasn’t expecting novelty parmas on the menu at Kicks so seeing a parma section on the menu threw me for a moment, unfortunately after a month away everyone on the team was craving a standard parma so we didn’t get a chance to try the novelties this time around. We placed our order at the bar and watched a bit of tennis while waiting for the arrival of our dinner.

The tap list at Kicks is … Okay, with the massive copper tanks of Carlton Draught looming precariously above our seats they also had Furphy, Four Pines, Pirate Life, Mountain Goat and Fat Yak to name a few of the other options. Die hard craft-heads may be disappointed, but the should be enough of a choice to satisfy most needs.

About 20 minutes after ordering the parmas arrived at the table. The chips and salad looked great on the plate, but more on them later. The exposed schnitzel peeking out from under the cheese worried me though, it looked pretty overcooked and those were deli window schnitzel crumbs if I’d ever seen them. With great trepidation we picked up our cutlery and tucked in.

As suspected the schnitzel was not great, overcooked and dry as expected with super thin chicken throughout (see cross section below). As much as the toppings tried to save it the schnitzel (a lynch pin of any parma) was the weakest element of the dish.

If you like cheese then this is a parma for you. Flavoursome, gooey, well cooked cheese did its best to rescue this parma from mediocrity. The ham was there but didn’t add a whole lot to the flavour profile while the napoli sauce was barely detectable, both by the eye or by the tastebuds. As far as the parma goes this one was a pretty disappointing outing for the first of 2019.

The chips, on the other hand, were fantastic. Served in a seperate basket away from the underside of the parma, they were plentiful, cooked to perfection and lightly dusted with a spicy seasoning. Every table was adorned with a bottle of tomato sauce so chip dippage was readily available if required (although to be honest I ate most of them sauce free, they were well seasoned enough without it).

The garden salad was another winner. Fresh and crisp with plenty of ingredients and loaded with honey mustard dressing. If you’re after a healthy salad to accompany your parma then this definitely isn’t it, however if you’re after a palate cleanser and a suitably unhealthy side to an already unhealthy meal then this is a pretty good example of one.

“Quality sides let down by a disappointing schnitzel. A nicer piece of chicken and this could have been great!”

— Nikki

For $21.90 I won’t be running back to Kicks to try this parma again. Monday night offers a parma (of any variety) with a pot for $16, which, to be honest, is a pretty good deal and probably about what this parma is worth and I think the only scenario I would recommend this parma.

When it comes to novelty toppings on a parma I always say that they have to be able to do the standard parmas well first, and then pile the other stuff on. If you can’t do an original parma successfully then don’t stack extra stuff on as a way to hide it, it’s a crutch.

I enjoyed the vibe at Kicks. The tabletop arcades were a neat touch, especially with the screens above mirroring the gameplay below so onlookers could observe the game. It’s the kind’ve pub I could see leaning into eSports as well as traditional sports when the Overwatch League fires up again.

As for the parma it has potential. The sides are great, the toppings are mostly fine, it just all falls apart when you use a crap piece of chicken as the base. Check it out on Monday night and get the novelty toppings to cover up its failings, otherwise I’d say give this one a miss.

Parma - 5.25

Chips - 8.50

Salad - 7.50

Value - 5.80

Total - 6.46

The search continues...

2018 Parma of the Year awards

Happy New Year! I hope everyone had a quality holiday break. 2019 is now upon us but before we can crack into a fresh 12 months of the search for the perfect parma lets first get a bit retrospective and take a look back at the year that was 2018.

2018 was a quality year! We had parmas in cast iron skillets at GG EZ, we discovered the unholy abomination that was the Cheeseburparma at Father’s Office, we launched the first of a couple of video reviews with The Barwon Heads Pub we had a parma on the other side of the flippin’ planet in Galway, Ireland and even got a mention in both the Herald Sun and the Wall Street goddamn Journal!

Looking back on 2018 I’m surprised at how many decent parmas we found. Compared to 2017 (which I have since dubbed “The year of the stinkers”) the bad to good parma ratio definitely leans towards the good end of the spectrum.

As usual we have our two main awards for the year - Parma of the Year and Best New Parma of 2018. But before we get to that lets look at some honorary mentions for parmas that have impressed us last year

Biggest Parma

It was early in 2018 that we discovered the parma at the Workers Club in Fitzroy, and for quite a while it was the hot favourite to take home the Best new parma of 2018 award (like I said, competition this year was fierce).

Not only was the schnitzel massive, engulfing everything on the plate, the chicken was of the purest quality, the toppings were fantastic and the sides brought it all together. It’s not often a big parma like this ticks so many boxes in other areas, but the parma at the Workers club managed to pull it off. Any other year this parma would have taken home a trophy, so I had to give it an honourable mention here at the very least. Check it out.

Most Creative Parma

In the year that we discovered the aforementioned Cheeseburparma you’d think the competition for most creative parma would be done and dusted, however while the Cheeseburparma was creative, the jury is still well and truly out as to whether it was any good. Enter multiple Golden Chook award winners The Imperial Hotel to introduce the world to the Pizza Parma…

A parma, sliced like a pizza that you can eat with your hands? Sign me up!

Best Home Delivered Parma

We didn’t get to many home delivered parmas this year, mostly because I’m running out of restaurants in my area that actually do parma delivery. Luckily of the two home delivered parmas we tried in 2018, the one from Frank’s Ristorante was pretty damn good!

Bad boy chips, super thick schnitzel, slathered in toppings. Pretty much the best parma in the Essendon area you can enjoy without putting on pants!

Most Improved Parma

This one is gonna be a tad controversial, I’ll explain why in a moment.

Hardimans Hotel. Once a poorly lit dive bar in Kensington which served us this parma -

(with a side of mice, that we could see running through the kitchen while we ate our parma), Underwent a truly stunning transformation in 2018, after being completely gutted both the pub and the parma served were totally unrecognisable, serving us this beauty on opening day …

However. Almost instantly after the review went live I started hearing reports that the parma Hardimans is now serving is no longer the parmesan and prosciutto encrusted glory that you see above. It has been scaled back to a more traditional parma. Not bad, but definitely not as unique and special as the parma we reviewed. Will be doing further investigation on this one in 2019 so stay tuned. Hopefully before we get back for a re-review the Hardimans parma can be restored to what we reviewed, as it was truly something special.

Best Brewery/Parma Combo

To be perfectly honest I’ve just made up this category so I can give The Cheeky Pint in Footscray a mention. As I said competition for the top spot was fierce this year, we had so many good parmas but it wouldn’t feel right not even giving them a nod.

as it definitely deserves to be checked out. The parma was thick, plump and juicy, the wedges were on point, the mustard aioli was a triumph and the beers on tap were delightful (I recommend the tasting paddle)

Best New Parma

Alright! Now for the trophies. For newcomers the Best New Parma is the first of two awards we give out every year. Simply put the Best New Parma award goes to the best parma we ate in 2018. The highest scoring new addition to the list in the last 12 months, and this years winner shone high above all the fantastic parmas I have just listed - Congratulations to Abbotsford’s The Park Hotel.

We’d tried it before in 2012 and, even though it was good back then, the new and improved Park Hotel parma is next level. Thick, plump chicken breast and lashings of smoked ham bring this flavour sensation to life, accompanied by perfectly seasoned chips and a tantalisingly fresh coleslaw that sides the parma perfectly.

If you have yet to visit the Park (or their sister pub, The Royston in Richmond) I highly recommend you do. You won’t be disappointed.

Parma of the Year

While the Best New Parma goes to the best parma we had of 2018, Parma of the Year goes to the best parma we've had since ParmaDaze.com started in 2010 - and as none of the parmas we had in 2018 have topped the 2016 and 2017 winner a third trophy was delivered to Melbourne’s parma kings… The Birmingham Hotel in Fitzroy.

Still fantastic after all these years, and consistently packing in the punters on their Tuesday & Wednesday $13 parma nights, not only is it the best parma in town its also the best parma night in town.

A well deserved hat trick to The Birmy.

And with that another year is over! Massive thanks to all the readers for the support throughout the year, your comments, suggestions and abusive emails are what keep me going.

Another big thanks to the review team, When you drunkenly agreed to do a weekly parma with me after a filling meal and too many pints at Mrs. Parmas I bet you didn't think we'd still be doing it 8 goddamn years later. Couldn't do it without you all. Many, many thanks.

I hope you enjoyed our retrospective on 2018! I hope I didn’t miss any. Naughtons and The Last Jar were pretty great too.

New reviews kicking off next week. Stay tuned for a heap more fun in 2019!