#285 - 'The Standard Hotel'

Where? - 293 Fitzroy St. Fitzroy

Price? - $24

Website? - http://www.thestandardhotel.com.au/

Reviewers – Lee & Nikki

It's no secret that I love a good backstreets pub, and Fitzroy's Standard Hotel might be the quintessential example (you might even say it sets the standard. Badum tshh).

Surrounded by a myriad of one-way streets that always seem to be driving away from the pub, it took a fair bit of focus on Google maps to find the Standard, but once I laid my eyes on it I knew it was my kind of pub.

Walking in the front door you get smacked in the face with the character of this pub. The walls are lined with an eclectic range of all kinds of paraphernalia, mostly music and Fitzroy Football Club themed, but there's a little bit of everything in there.

It's a laid back pub with a refreshing lack of pretentiousness and the clientele run the full gamut of Fitzroy millennials to retiree's propping up the bar.

Out the back is a beer garden that seems to go on forever, snaking back even deeper into suburban Fitzroy - It would have been my pick of where to grab a table for dinner however, as early as 6:30 on a Thursday afternoon, it was packed out there.

Luckily there were still plenty of open tables inside for us to choose from. We sat, checked the menu, ordered a cheeky entree of saganaki ($12), grabbed a beverage and soaked up the atmosphere.

The saganaki arrived and it hit the spot with gusto - I was surprised at how generous of a serve it was (you can't really tell by the below picture, but that is two full slices of cheese stacked on top of each other). Great starter to the meal.

After polishing that off we got on to the main event...

A bit of a novelty parma! Even though it's touted as "deluxe" there is no "regular" parma on the menu, other than an eggplant option for the vegetarians ($20) the deluxe parma is the only choice.

As to be expected from a Fitzroy pub the beer list was chock full of craft beer options. 11 taps offered everything from Melbourne Bitter to Stone & Wood to Hawkers to Moo Brew and more, definitely enough choices to wet any whistle.

Just as we polished off the last of the saganaki the main event arrived (surprisingly speedy service).

At first glance this parma looked damn impressive. Big on the plate and served mostly not atop the chips - We picked up our cutlery and tucked in.

The schnitzel was thick, white, juicy chicken breast. Cooked to perfection and crumbed just as well with what looked like a home made crumb blend. Quite thin on the crumbs and only slightly flakey, it was almost a near perfect foundation for the dish - However all of the parmas that arrived were served quite cold.

Not a huge issue as temperature can be chalked up to a momentary glitch in the kitchen and not a persistent issue, but I like my parmas piping hot when they hit the table, this one was only lukewarm.

The toppings were overall pretty great. The napoli sauce was very rich, almost too rich, but otherwise very tasty. The prosciutto was a welcome addition, grilled to a crunch and adding its trademark salty deliciousness throughout.

The flavour of the tasty cheese permeated all the other flavours well, the feta not so much... As much as I enjoy feta it was lost amongst the other flavours of the dish.

The chips were a triumph. Served piping hot, mostly away from the parma (with a couple of stragglers underneath soaking up the juices for those that swing that way). Well seasoned and even with a pot of tomato sauce thrown in for good measure, a fine accompaniment to the parma.

The salad ... not so much. With all the other elements on the plate kicking goals it was quite disappointing that the salad came off as a bit of an afterthought. Nothing but lettuce leaves with a couple of onion slivers, definite room for improvement here.

“Could have been great had it not been served rather cold. Delicious chips, basic salad and the feta cheese didn’t add much”

— Nikki

$24 for the parma we received? Yeah I've got no qualms paying that again. They didn't skimp on any of the ingredients (except the salad) and you can tell a whole lot of love went into its preparation. From what I can see online I can't find mention of any sort of parma night, but for the price they charge its an honest feed that I doubt you'll walk away from hungry.

Although not without its faults, the Standard offer up a pretty great parma. With a few tweaks here and there it could be a real contender. Definitely worth checking out if you're in the area. A great pub offering up a great feed.

Pros

• Great quality chicken
• Fantastic flavours throughout
• Top notch chips

Cons

• Served lukewarm
• Weak salad

Parma - 7.75

Chips - 8.50

Salad - 4.25

Value - 6.85

Total - 7.02

The search continues...

The search continues...

#284 - 'Albert and Sydney'

Where? - 382 Sydney Rd, Brunswick

Price? - $10 Thursday parma night, $21 normally

Website? - http://albertandsydney.com.au/

Reviewers – Lee & Nikki

I'm going to preface this review with two points. They might be a little spoiler-y to the rest of the review, however I need to make some things clear from the get-go.

1. This review is for the Thursday night $10 schnitzel & parma night at Albert & Sydney, not for the full priced parma.
2. I hate thigh chicken. I know some people are okay with the use of thigh, but there is a time and a place where its appropriate.

With that out of the way, let's begin.

New blood is rare on Sydney Road. Even with the multitude of bars and pubs that come and go from the stretch of businesses it's very rare that a new parma pops up for us to try - Which is why when one does appear we jump on it immediately.

Around the time we did our review of the Charles Weston I heard word of another cheap parma night in Brunswick, the place that used to be Albert Street Food & Wine had a new name and a new menu - parma included. I saw an advertisement for their $10 Thursday schnitzel night and locked it in for us to try.

Albert & Sydney is a very cool space. With a DJ cranking tunes on a Thursday night, sunny beer garden out the back and plush leather booths to sink into its the perfect vibe to grab a cocktail and a feed.

We sat at our table, ordered some drinks and checked the menu, a sheet clipped to the front of the regular menu listed the details of schnitzel night at Albert & Sydney...

After a quick giggle at "neapolitan" sauce (was it going to be chocolate, strawberry and vanilla flavoured?) we ordered our parmas, due to the $10 special we had to choose between chips or salad, so we split the difference and got a plate of each so we could properly review both.

The Hawkers Pilsners went down a treat, and at $5 they were an absolute bargain. Reviewer Nikki opted for the espresso martini ($13 during happy hour) and was exceedingly impressed. Everything about Albert & Sydney was kicking goals at this stage, before too long our parmas arrived...

The schnitzel was tiny. Amazingly tiny. Out of sheer curiosity of "how much do they charge for this on a regular night" I grabbed the menu and checked the proper listing. My heart sank.

They use thigh at Albert & Sydney.

We have covered this before on a previous review, but there is a time and a place for thigh, and a chicken parma is not one of them. I picked up the cutlery, tucked in and the grey chicken that greeted me confirmed my suspicions. Crap.

It was a damn shame too, as the crumbing used on the thigh was absolutely fantastic. Crisp, flavoursome and a fantastic crunch, however it was all spoiled by the chicken underneath. The schnitzel, although small, was not hammered too thick.

The toppings were decent. Good coverage (although it was a pretty small target to hit). The cheese was flavoursome and the napoli fresh. I think a shave of ham would have helped as well, something from the full priced parma that was absent on the parma night variety.

The chips, while looking quite lonely on the massive plate, were pretty good. Beer battered, served piping hot and well seasoned - Definitely the best thing on the plate.

The salad over on Reviewer Nikki's plate was adequate, but not much more. Mostly lettuce with a few slivers of onion and tomato, she was definitely envious of my chips. It was fresh, but underdressed.

“So disappointed they used thigh as the crumbs were beautiful. Chips and salad would have been nice as well”

— Nikki

Our rule of thumb with judging value at ParmaDaze is "Would I happily pay the price I paid to have it again", and although it's cheap my answer to that for the parma here is a definite no. Price isn't everything.

We've had a lot of discount parma nights in the time we've been reviewing, but none have felt as cheap as this one. It looked minuscule on the plate, only giving the option of chips or salad, stripping out the ham that is normally on the menu and using the cheapest cut of chicken you can find. Yeah $10 is insanely cheap for a meal, but to be honest I'd rather pay $15 and get a parma with two sides, a slice of ham and a chicken breast. The $5 stubbies of Hawkers would be enough to get me in the door alone if they served a quality meal alongside it.

I know some people swear by the use of chicken thigh, I am not one of those people, maybe my bias against thigh has made this review harsher than it should be but in my opinion there is just no place for thigh in a chicken parma, no excuses.

Other than the parma Albert & Sydney is a cool venue with super friendly staff, amazing cocktails and a really chilled out vibe. If I'm welcome back I could definitely see ducking back in for a few lazy hours of cocktails in the sun. Just get rid of the thigh.

Parma - 2.00

Chips - 7.00

Salad - 4.00

Value - 3.00

Total - 3.60

The search continues...

#283 - 'The Grandview Hotel: Redux'

Where? - 47 Pearson St. Brunswick west

Price? - $15 Wednesday parma night. $23.50 normally

Website? - http://www.grandviewbrunswick.com.au/

Reviewers – Carly, Kim, Lee, Nikki, Pat & Shanan

It's redo week! The week we revisit a pub that has already been reviewed due to changes in the menu, recommendation that it has improved or gotten worse since our last review, or for pubs that we feel just didn't get a fair shake the first time around.

Brunswick's Grandview Hotel has been on our redo list for quite some time - Pretty much since we walked out the door the first time we reviewed it.

Back in 2013 I was contacted by a group of Swinburne Uni students who were filming a documentary about parmas, we arranged to meet up at the Grandview, grab a parma and have a chat. It was a fun night even though in the end we hit the cutting room floor of the documentary. However to get permission to film at the Grandview we had to break our golden rule of reviewing - We had to let the pub know ahead of time that we were coming.

The parma was delicious (You can check out our original review here), looked beautiful and was presented perfectly - a little too perfectly, and it always niggled me that we might not have received the same level quality parma as anyone walking in off the street would have received. 3 years later redo week rolls around and I hear that the Grandview is now offering a $15 parma night with free trivia and $15 jugs of Hawkers IPA, that's all the push I need to load up the parma bus and head back to the Grandview!

The Grandview is just how I remembered it. A cosy backstreets local with friendly staff, fun atmosphere and a spacious dining room to the side. The trivia was being held in the front bar this week so we pulled up a chair and prepared ourselves for the quizzing of a lifetime.

This is normally where I'd show a grab of the menu, but as we're here for parma night and parma night alone this is the only information we were interested in...

Although, for the curious, the parma on the non-parma night menu clocks in at $23.50.

We ordered our meals, grabbed a couple of jugs and discussed funny sounding team names. As I've mentioned the beer of choice for the night was Hawkers Pale Ale, but the Grandview also has quite a decent tap list if you feel like something a little fancier...

I love when pubs have boards with their available beers like this, it makes my job so much easier.

Our parmas arrived shortly before the trivia kicked off...

For $15 this was a quality bit of schnitzel. Biggest gripe is that it was a little overcooked and slightly dry, but other than that this was a damn tasty bird. Pure chicken breast, well crumbed and thick enough that you wont walk away hungry.

It would seem that a few parmas around the table spent a little time under the heat lamps as the others were prepared, as there were a couple of complaints about being served a lukewarm parma, hopefully that was just a once off glitch.

The toppings were plentiful and flavoursome, despite some minor coverage issues (there was a bit of nude schnitz around the edges) they weren't at all tight with the quantity of ham, napoli and cheese. The napoli was much richer than last time around, 2013's napoli had more of a soupy texture while 2016's was much heavier on the tomato paste.

The cheese was tasty and well cooked, it slipped around the parma a little bit while eating, but it was manageable. The leg ham made itself known with slight smokey flavour. For $15 parma night? Definitely a satisfying meal.

The chips were outstanding. Beer battered, piping hot and well seasoned - just the way we like 'em. I was a little disappointed to see that the garlic aioli wasn't included like it was in 2013, however I'm not sure if we should attribute that to the doco crew or the fact that we were eating in the front bar as opposed to the dining room. It was a bit of a mixed bag with serving sizes for the chips. Everyone got a decent serving, but some lucky ducks definitely scored the lions share with a massive pile accompanying their parma.

The salad was okay. Plenty of it with fresh ingredients, however a little more dressing would have been nice. Acceptable, but didn't blow us away.

“Could have been great except my parma was served on the cold side”

— Nikki

“Great value on parma night”

— Pat

“A little chewy and the cheese kept falling off the parma - But it was tasty! Chip lotto with the varying number of chips on each plate, deliciously beer battered none the less”

— Carly

“come for the parma, stay for the trivia”

— Shanan

“Parma was okay, not a massive amount of flavour! The chips were my favourite part of the meal. Great pub, good atmosphere, will definitely be back!”

— Kim

$15 with $15 jugs and free trivia? Value this week is off the charts. The trivia alone kept us wildly entertained until nearly 10pm (the Funky Bunch definitely know how to put together an entertaining quiz), and the cheap beers were just icing on the cake.

From what we saw last night I had been worrying about this review for the last three years for nothing - The quality of the parma at the Grandview is just as good now as it was then, There were some slight inconsistencies and issues that could be chalked up to an insanely rushed night in the kitchen - but nothing too terrible. In the end we wound up coming in 2nd in the trivia (ironically to a team calling themselves "The Parmy Army" who came in first) and took home a $30 voucher for our next visit, which won't be too far in the future I'm sure.

Oh, and be sure to book in advance if you intend to join the trivia night - The joint was packed to capacity on the Wednesday we visited.

I can definitely recommend the Grandview's parma night, It was an amazingly entertaining night with good grub, good beer and good people - What more can you ask for?

Parma - 7.5

Chips - 7.75

Salad - 5.42

Value - 8.50

Total - 7.33

The search continues...

#282 - 'Carmine's Bistro'

Where? - 234 Lygon St, Carlton

Price? - $26.50 for Traditional, $28.50 for novelties

Website? - http://www.carminesbistro.com.au/

Reviewers – Daniel, Ella, Fridge, Kim, Lee, Nikki, Pat & Shanan

When Instagram shots of Carmine's parmas started popping on to my radar I knew it was one we had to try. Massive schnitzels covered in mountains of toppings of all different shapes and sizes and absolutely beautifully presented. We normally avoid Italian Restaurants as they tend to lean towards the really traditional (Bolognese sauce with really thin schnitz's), but from what we could see of Carmine's they really hit the nail on the head.

We ran the gamut of oh-so annoying spruikers on Lygon Street, headed into Carmine's and grabbed a table. It was relatively quiet inside, but we were pretty early and Thursday night isn't exactly the hippest night to hit the town.

Being quite new compared to some of the other Lygon St. establishments (opened in 2014), the interior of Carmine's is a fun mix of eclectic and traditional. Past the full sized horse sculpture with a lamp on its head you'll find comfy overstuffed leather chairs, checkered red and white tablecloths and a very professionally made cocktail or two.

The service at Carmine's is absolutely stellar. Every person we dealt with gave the vibe that they would bend over backwards for anything we needed. Beers were never left empty for more than 20 seconds and it never seemed as if any of our whims were a hassle - If we gave a score for service Carmine's would easily be a 10 out of 10.

We grabbed some menus, as there were some novelty options to choose from.

Normally with novelty toppings for parmas pubs/restaurants will pretty much pull out their pizza menu and chuck that on top of a schnitzel (the toppings listed in the menu, not the menu itself. That would taste terrible) - Carmine's has done something different, in that it seems that their novelty varieties are based on pasta sauces and not pizza toppings. A slight change, but definitely something we haven't seen before. Points for originality.

I opted for the Amatriciana parma, normally I would go the traditional but as my go-to pasta sauce is Amatriciana I just couldn't pass that up.

No beers on tap but plenty to offer in bottles. A full list of both imported and local beers. Nothing too crafty, but enough to appeal to most sensibilities

We ordered our parmas and waited. and waited. and waited a bit more. They say good food takes time to prepare but at the 40 minute mark there were quite a few worried glances towards the kitchen. But eventually our meals did arrive...

The Traditional -

The Carmine's -

The Amatriciana -

Points for presentation as these parmas looked outstanding on the plate. The schnitzel was big enough on its own, but then an extra half-schnitzel was thrown in to the side for good measure, melded together with the toppings.

First thing of note was that the crumbing on the parma was sheer perfection. Thin, great flavour and had the perfect crunch. The chicken beneath it was also top quality. Not too thick, but lovely and juicy. Definitely a solid foundations for the toppings above.

Speaking of toppings, they weren't tight with them at all. I think half a pig's worth of pancetta wound up atop my parma. I was expecting a little more punch from the chilli napoli but unfortunately it failed to delivery, offering only the faintest hint of chilli oil on the palate.

I enjoyed my parma and walked out satisfied, opinions around the table were mixed. Those who had the Carmine's parma echoed my sentiment of expecting more of a kick to the chilli, saying it came off as a little bland in practice.

Oddly enough those to have the least complaints about the flavour were those who opted for the traditional parma, claiming that there was a delightful smokiness permeating the dish that really brought it to life.

It's no surprise at ParmaDaze that we aren't a fan of french fries (aka Maccas chips), but at least when they're done at Carmine's they're presented in style. The tipped-over-paper cup is a unique and eye catching way of presenting fries which (for fries at least) weren't that bad, and the pot of sauce delivered to the table without request was definitely appreciated.

In a very controversial move the parma at Carmine's is delivered with no salad whatsoever. Quite a disappointment, as with the sheer size of this parma it needed something fresh to break it up. Fried chicken upon cheese upon pancetta with a side of fried potatoes is a lot to handle at once without the ability to take a breather and grab some fresh cucumber. I know quite a few of our readers couldn't care less about the salad, however in our opinion a quality salad would have really brought this parma to life. The previously established "You don't win friends with salad" rule has been invoked for this review.

“Parma was nice and had a lovely crumbing. Fries were good, would have loved a salad on the side to finish it off”

— Fridge

“Enormous but unfortunately quite bland. Feels like not much effort goes into the dish other than the size of the schnitzel. Service was great though”

— Pat (Carmine's)

“Great woodfire smoked taste, great crumbing, not enough cheese or napoli sauce. Maccas chips. Would have been much better with a salad”

— Ella (Traditional)

“Big feed but the napoli needed more flavour ”

— Shanan (Carmine's)

“Decent size, but a little bland”

— Daniel (Traditional)

At $26.50 for standard and $28.50 for novelty this isn't exactly a cheap parma (if you're after a discount parma option on Lygon check out Universal up the road). Is the Carmine's parma worth the price tag? Maybe. The ingredients were all top notch, they weren't at all tight with the toppings and everyone walked away clutching their stomachs as they were so full - Yet the lack of even a hint of salad definitely hurts, especially at this price tag.

I had a lovely evening at Carmine's, and if you find yourself on Lygon street then it is definitely a restaurant to consider if you feel like a classy night out. The service was outstanding, the restaurant was lovely and the parma, while missing the mark on a couple of small points, and taking a pronounced hit in score due to lack of salad, was extremely enjoyable. I'd definitely go back, but would probably stick to the traditional parma over the novelties, as that appeared to be the best of the bunch. Worth a crack if you're in the area.

Parma - 7.25

Chips - 5.50

Salad - "You don't win friends with salad" rule invoked

Value - 5.71

Total - 6.14

The search continues...

United States of America #4

You may remember that I disappeared for a while last month. It wasn't much of a secret, the website stopped updating and the ParmaDaze Instagram became a travel site for a while.

If you missed all the hoopla, in a nutshell Myself and a few mats hired a car and drove from Louisiana to Cincinatti, then hit Los Angeles and Las Vegas on the way out. Many spectacular (and not so spectacular) meals were had on this trip, and I also managed to track down a couple of parmas.

We'll be here forever if I go through every meal we had, but here are some highlights and I'll bookend the non-parma stuff with a parma at the start and a parma at the end. Enjoy!

SAL & MOOKIES. Biloxi, Mississippi

If you ever watched the reality TV show "Party Down South" Then you know about Biloxi. It's a party and casino town where the sun is shining and the drinks flowed freely (literally, at the casino we stayed in you didn't have to pay for drinks over the bar). Biloxi is Vegas for rednecks, and after much alcohol consumption we stopped into Sal & Mookies New York Pizzeria & Ice Cream for a feed.

We grabbed a table, checked the menu and I shed a tear as I spied the first parma of the trip -

I was surprised to see it actually listed as a "Parmigiana" as every other time I've been in the USA it has been pretty much exclusively referred to as a "Chicken Parmesan".

The others ordered a pizza, I ordered the parma.

The Pizza looked absolutely phenomenal...

Goddamn food envy...

The parma? Not as phenomenal...

Food envy ... increasing!

The parma was okay, as usual with parmas in the US it is considered more of a pasta dish than a pub feed. Rather than one big schnitz my bowl of spaghetti was topped with a few smaller chicken cutlets. It was tasty, a little dry, could definitely have used much more sauce (especially when I finished the parma and was essentially left with a bowl of dry spaghetti). The garlic bread failed to impress.

It was tasty, and much more filling that the photo would lead you to believe. But holy crap that pizza looked good.

BIG PIE IN THE SKY PIZZERIA. Kennesaw, Georgia.

Clearly I had pizza on the brain after Biloxi as a few days later I routed our road trip past Big Pie In The Sky pizza, A pizza joint in Georgia so famous for their giant pizza's they appeared on the TV show Man Vs. Food.

Why? This is one of their pizzas...

I found this photo online. That's not me, I'm not that brave.

It's known as the "Carnivore Challenge" - $50 to attempt, $250 if you finish it between two people in an hour. Unfortunately if you want to participate in the challenge you have to call and schedule in a time, we weren't nearly that prepared, so instead we just opted for pizza by the slice.

Even in slice form its friggin' massive, that tray you see the slice sitting on is what we would normally call a "medium" sized pizza. It was delicious, fresh, crispy and satisfied my pizza cravings perfectly. Would definitely recommend if you find yourself nearby!

HUBBA HUBBA SMOKEHOUSE. Flat Rock, North Carolina

We stumbled upon Hubba Hubba purely by accident. Driving the back roads of North Carolina we stumbled upon a town that reminded me of Hepburn. Small, quaint and trees everywhere (a welcome change from the hours and hours of generic concrete freeway we had been driving on to this point. We got out of the car to stretch our legs and the smell of smoked meat attracted us like one of those cartoons where the wisps of smoke form a giant hand beckoning to come closer.

This place was awesome! Simple and rustic. Place an order at the window and wait for it to be called. The menu was quite extensive for a lover of BBQ...

I opted for the brisket plate with vinegar slaw and cornbread.

Holy jesus this stuff was good. Hands down the best brisket I had ever eaten in my life. So tender it was almost a liquid and absolutely bursting with flavour. The vinegar slaw was different, not exactly to my taste. The cornbread was out of this world, I never knew cornbread could be that tasty.

We left Hubba Hubba satisfied and with full stomachs - quite possibly the best meal we had on the entire trip, discovered completely by accident.

Kentucky Fried Chicken. Louisville, Kentucky

It had to be done, right? We only spent a night in Louisville so we didn't get to see as many of the sights as we would have liked, but one thing we made sure to do was to pay our respects to the master.

Followed by a trip to the first KFC we could find to see it was any better straight from the source.

Verdict? It was pretty much the same. Although a chocolate chip cookie with my crispy strip combo was a welcome addition.

Hang Over Easy. Cincinnati, Ohio

Hang Over Easy is one of those places that makes you think "Why don't we have this in Australia yet?!" It is a hybrid cafe/pub fully licensed that specialises in one thing - Hangover food.

Plenty of taps of craft beer so you can get your hair of the dog, coupled with a menu of items such as Bread Pudding French Toast, Scrambled Eggs with fries and double chocolate chip pancakes. I opted for the Chicken & Waffles...

... And holy crap did it hit the spot.

Someone with money, make this happen in Melbourne and send me an invite.

Buca Di Beppo. Universal City, California

After a day hanging out at the Wizarding World of Harry Potter and beers with these blokes at Universal Studios...

Our tummies had the rumbles, so we decided to stop in at Buca Di Beppo.

If you are unaware, Buca is an Italian restaurant chain in the USA that serves all their meals "Family Style", meaning if you order a serve of pasta you get enough pasta to feed the whole family ... and the same goes for their parmas.

"Parmigiana" again! Maybe the yanks are finally coming to their senses. 

We ordered our family style parma and, as expected, it was a lot of food...

Basically one serve of chicken parmigiana at Buca is three parmas on a plate and a bowl of spaghetti (we ordered the garlic bread separately ... rookie mistake when only two people are eating).

The schnitzel was much better than at Sal & Mookies, Decent size but hammered a little thin for my taste. The problem with the Buca parma is that all of the napoli was on the spaghetti, meaning you had to combine it all on the plate to get anything but schnitz and cheese.

It was tasty, no Aussie parma thats for sure but definitely the best we had on the trip.

We got through two of the parmas, most of the spaghetti and a bit of the GB before giving up, finishing the meal looking not unlike the bloke from Monty Python's Meaning of Life

Pretty much sums up our entire trip to the states actually!

#281 - 'Horse Bazaar'

Where? - 392 Little Lonsdale st, Melbourne

Price? - $18

Website? - http://www.horsebazaar.com.au/

Reviewers – Lee, Matt, Nikki

From the moment I picked Horse Bazaar I knew it was going to be a unique experience. "Parmas at a Japanese cocktail bar" doesn't exactly roll of the tongue, yet in my research of places to try on the north side of the CBD, Horse Bazaar kept appearing.

How weird could it possibly be? We loaded up the parma bus and headed to Little Lonsdale street to find out.

Horse Bazaar is definitely not our usual kind've place, although it was far less "Japanese" than I was expecting - Other than a few flourishes of anime on the wall of projected images that ran constantly it was pretty much your standard CBD cocktail bar. The menu had a definite Japanese bent (other than the parma, of course) but Horse Bazaar had already subverted a lot of my expectations.

We arrived early, about 6:30 if I recall, to a virtually empty pub (this changed as the night wore on, by the time we left it was relatively busy) We pulled up a pew and checked the menu -

$18 for the parma (or チキンカツ, as it is translated on the menu) with your choice of original, curry or minced pork varieties. Having enjoyed the curry parma at St. Kilda's The Wee Chief immensely I opted for the curry variety tonight while everyone else went with the original. It's also worth noting that Horse Bazaar also has both a vegetarian parma and a parma burger available.

Four beer taps at the bar had a respectable range. Kirin, Southern Bay, a Temple beer and a cider, nothing too fancy but enough to wet any whistle with a couple of more bottled options in the fridge. Horse Bazaar is primarily a cocktail bar and it seems to be what they do best as some of the drinks we saw getting whipped up as we ate looked damn good.

With a lightning quick turn around of no more than 7 minutes, our チキンカツ were out of the kitchen

The Original チキンカツ -

The Curry チキンカツ -

That ... actually didn't look too bad! Different, but tasty.

Without hesitation I tucked in and instantly knew what they had done. If you've ever had a chicken Katsu Don, swap out the rice for some chips and salad and you've got yourself Horse Bazaar's curry チキンカツ, in fact a quick google tells me that "チキンカツ" does not translate to Chicken Parma, but is in fact the direct translation for "Chicken Katsu". I see what you did there, Horse Bazaar. Very sneaky.

It wasn't a traditional parma, but it was good! The schnitzel is exactly what you would find on a chicken katsu. Rather than one piece of schnitzel the parmas foundation was made of a few smaller chicken pieces, held together with toppings and sauces. It was a little thinner than I would normally like, but perfectly crumbed and delightfully crispy.

Flavour-wise all I could taste was curry sauce, it was delicious, and exactly what I had ordered, but it absolutely annihilated every other flavour on the plate. The cheese was light sprinkling of shredded parmesan, the "napoli" was an almost salsa-like mix of freshly diced tomatoes, onions, sesame seeds and other ingredients that reminded me more of a bruschetta topping than anything else.

Mayo is an interesting addition to parma topping that I honestly didn't hate. After this I'd be interested to try a more traditional parma with a splash of mayo included.

I enjoyed mine immensely, but the rest of the table that ordered the original チキンカツ did not share my enthusiasm. The general consensus on the original being "It tastes good, but it isn't a parma", to which I'd be inclined to agree.

The one thing everyone could agree on is that the chips were a surprise highlight. Beer battered, well seasoned, crunchy and piping hot ... A fine addition to the チキンカツ, and went very well with the curry sauce.

The salad was okay, a similar bruschetta style topping that was on the parma was also on the salad. It was fresh and tasty. Nothing to write home about but nothing to complain about either.

“The chips were the star of the dish for me. A little small, but quite tasty”

— Nikki

“Hard to rate this one. A unique Japanese look and taste, but not familiar enough to be really enjoyable as a parma. Chips were surprisingly tasty”

— Matt

For $18 I walked out satisfied. It was a little smaller than we would normally expect but any price tag under $20 these days is a win in my book. I think there are some lunch specials on the website but not sure if the parma is included - might be worth a gander.

If the bastard lovechild of a chicken katsu don and a chicken parma sounds like something you might be interested in then Horse Bazaar may be worth checking out. I don't think I can give my seal of approval to the original variety, however in my opinion the Curry チキンカツ was delicious and I'd have no qualms getting it again. Judged strictly as a parma it was a little wanting, but judging it as its own thing it was a very tasty dish.

Pros

• Inexpensive
• Flavoursome
• Fresh toppings

Cons

• Not a parma
• A bit small

Parma - 6.50

Chips - 8.67

Salad - 4.83

Value - 6.83

Total - 6.67

The search continues...

#280 - 'The Charles Weston Hotel'

Where? - 27 Weston St. Brunswick

Price? - $12. Only available Thursdays

Website? - http://charlesweston.com.au/

Reviewers – Daniel, Kim, Lee, Nikki, Pat

I'm gonna admit something from the jump this week - I love the Charles Weston. Even though it isn't quite on Sydney Rd. I'd still consider it the best pub on Sydney Rd. It has a great backstreets local charm coupled with multiple open fireplaces, friendly staff, live music, board games and a solid craft beer list, I'm not ashamed to say that I've spent many a Satuday and Sunday arvo wasting away the hours playing Jenga by the fireplace.

There was only one problem with the Weston. They didn't do a parma. Every time I arrived I'd check the menu in the hopes that they decided to add some cheese and napoli to their schnitzel and coleslaw but my heart was broken time and time again, until this week when I checked the Charles Weston Instagram and noticed an addition to their weekly "What's on" post...

Holy crap they're doing a parma night. They're doing a parma night on our review night. There was no debate, this week we were loading up the parma bus and heading to the Charles Weston.

I pretty much described everything I like about this pub in the opening paragraph, but here's some more. Along with the fireplaces, board games and beers the Weston also boasts a surprisingly spacious beer garden out the side, a full sized ping pong table indoors and a very cosy, dimly lit dining room out the back, which is where we set up shop for the evening.

Now one thing I want to make perfectly clear - As it stands there still isn't a parma on the standard menu at the Charles Weston. The parma we partook in last night is currently a Thursday night thing only, so be sure to mark your calendars as such.

Approaching the bar to order I was surprised to see a few novelty options thrown into the mix...

Although that Mexican parma looked mighty tempting I'm a parma purist at heart and opted for the original. Orders were places and we returned to the dining room to await the arrival of our dinner.

It makes my job of listing the beers on tap so much easier when a pub just has a board with a list of everything they serve...

I stuck to the Steam Ale all night but there's definitely enough options there to keep everyone happy.

About 15 minutes after ordering our parmas arrived.

When the plates fell to the table I thought the parma looked a tad small, however on cutting in it was revealed to be quite a plump, hearty bit of chicken. The crumbs were a tad thick, but the thickness of the chicken led to a perfectly fine chicken to crumb ratio. It was pure chicken breast, served piping hot and well cooked.

For $12 I had a horrible fear we were going to get a processed, heart shaped, supermarket deli window schnitzel - I was pleasantly surprised that this was not the case.

The toppings were plentiful. The cheese could have used a bit more time under the grill to be perfect but it was otherwise quite tasty.

The napoli was present, but a little lost under the massive slice of smoked ham that had a succulent smokey flavour that permeated the entire dish. If you like your parmas with a smokey flavour then this is definitely one for you. If that isn't your bag the Mexican parma might be more up your alley, which from what I saw looked quite good.

Unfortunately this marks the second consecutive week of Maccas chips. I know some people may like them but to me they have no business being served with anything other that a large quarter pounder meal. As far as shoestring fries go they were okay. Well seasoned and they kept their temperature a lot better than last week. Other than my irrational hatred for that kind of chip I've got nothing major to complain about.

The side of coleslaw got mixed reviews from around the table. I enjoyed it, it was nice to have a coleslaw that wasn't absolutely drowning in mayonnaise. I always thought coleslaw was a universally loved side to a parma but I was surprised to learn that some of our reviewers would prefer a more traditional salad. Weirdos.

“Surprisingly great quality for a parma special. Can’t ask for much more for the price”

— Nikki

“Chicken was good, coleslaw was alright (considering coleslaw is the worst of all sides). Meal was small-ish but definitely worth it for twelve clams”

— Daniel

“Great breast, great value. Chips and salad were a let down but definitely a good bargain”

— Pat

“Parma was tasty, chicken was thick! The smokey ham was a bit overpowering for me. I’m a fan of maccas chips, however in this case in the parma had been served with some beer battered chips and a decent salad it would definitely score a bit higher”

— Kim

For only $12 this is a parma you should be checking out. If you live in the Brunswick area you've got absolutely nothing to lose. It bums me out that parma night at the Weston is only on Thursdays as it means I won't be able to take advantage of this fantastic deal again.

The parma at the Charles Weston isn't perfect, but for the price you can forgive a lot of its sins. If you're after a no nonsense, honest feed in a fantastic atmosphere at bargain basement prices then Thursday night parma night at the Weston is definitely one to check out.

Pros

• Fantastic for the price
• Thick chicken breast
• 3 varieties available

Cons

• Maccas chips
• Slightly heavy on the crumbs

Parma - 8.20

Chips - 4.80

Salad - 6.00

Value - 9.00

Total - 7.24

The search continues...

#279 - 'Transport: Redux'

Where? - Federation Square, Melbourne

Price? - $22

Website? - http://www.transporthotel.com.au/

Reviewers – Lee, Matt, Nikki, Stefo, Tony

Well, last night was a bit of a disaster, as Eric Bana would put it if you watched Full Frontal in the 90's, it was a complete shemozzle.

The night started with a solid plan, Head into the city to Sand Hill Road's newest creation The Garden State Hotel. Sure they don't take bookings but we'll get there early and secure a table... She'll be right!

Incorrect. Apparently I didn't get the memo that the Garden State is the busiest bloody pub in Melbourne right now, and if we wanted to snag a table in the public bar we should have headed in at about 5:30am. The place was shoulder-to-shoulder packed from the time we got there (6ish) to the time we gave up (7:30ish). Those that had booths weren't moving and those that needed a booth were circling like velociraptors. On the rare occasion some seating did open up it was snatched away in milliseconds (thats when the attack comes - not from the front... but from the sides. The other group of people scoping out the booth you want, you didn't even know were there).

So we bailed on the Garden State, vowing to return once the hoopla dies down, and went to our backup spot Hairy Little Sista on Little Collins, but wouldn't you know it... They've taken the parma off the menu!

Okay, lets try Beer Deluxe. Shit. Only the Hawthorn Beer Deluxe has a parma on the menu, not the Fed Square one.

By this point we were cold, we were hungry, and we could see Transport in the distance. What the hell, it's been four years, let's give them a redo.

I don't think I've been to Transport since the first time we reviewed it back in August 2012, and to be honest I don't think the concrete monolith has changed one iota since then.

The indoor seating at Transport is weird. The area around the main bar is propagated with one or two extremely long concrete slabs with fixed wooden chairs that are a pain in the arse to get into and out of, rather than bother with those we opted to sit outside under the umbrella and by one of the many gas heaters.

We checked the menu...

Ordered our meals and grabbed a pint.

On our last visit I praised Transport's use of the Boomerang ordering system (It's the thing where you get a little buzzer that flashes and vibrates when your food is ready to be collected). This time around however, the Boomerang failed us.

Between the review team we had three Boomerangs. Two of them chimed 10 minutes after ordering, the third stayed silent. Three of us tucked into our parmas while two of the group looked on with puppy dog eyes. It wasn't until we were nearly finished our meals that they checked on theirs at the bar only to discover that the order hadn't been put through the system, and the Boomerang they were given was about as useful as a rock.

Some complimentary pints were handed out for their trouble, but I think the damage was already done.

Anyway, lets check out the parma, before and after

2012 -

2016 -

First up, I was ecstatic to see that they had gotten rid of the teardrop shaped plates that were almost impossible to eat off without spilling your parma everywhere.

The schnitzel was decently sized, you definitely aren't walking away from this parma hungry. The crumbs were crunchy but quite thick, I didn't manage to get a cross section this week as it had gotten too dark outside but the crumb to chicken ratio was way out of whack.

The chicken was cooked well, slightly dry but not criminally so, and gone was the weird flour taste that it had last time.

The toppings were average all round. The cheese needed more time under the grill, the ham was absolutely tasteless and the napoli, while no longer tasting pasty and burnt, tasted quite sweet - almost sugary, and it overpowered pretty much everything on the plate.

Gone are the super oily crinkle cut fries and in their place was a serving of what we all know as "Maccas chips". Never been a huge fan of Maccas chips with a parma unless they are done exceptionally well, which these were not. They were warm when arrived but turned stone cold and hard about 7 seconds after starting to eat them. A standard pub chip would have been a much better addition to the parma.

Salad was a mixed bag. Fresh and crisp ingredients no longer coated in oil, however I feel that they've gone too far the other way as it was almost entirely undressed and dry.

Lets play a little game, I call it "Guess which of the four reviewers giving quotes had their order lost and had to wait 45 minutes for their parma". It's a working title.

“Decent size but faltered on the execution. Thick crumbs and overly sweet napoli weren’t the best, and what happened to my crinkle cut chips?!””

— Nikki

“Not much to say on this one, all around average. Chips were very thin cut fries, such that they became dry & hard very quickly. Good sized portions - Good value”

— Matt

“Processed parma, chips had no flavour and the salad had no dressing. Extremely disappointing”

— Tony

“Where to begin? The chips were dry, hard and considering Maccas is walking distance I would have been more pleased if they just walked up there and dished them onto my plate. The parma had flavourless ham and the only taste that did resonate was the bland napoli. The salad was dry and boring. To top it all off they use the Boomerang system which, to me, just spells complete laziness, especially when the pub is barely busy. Not to mention we were lucky enough for them to lose our oder. The best thing of this whole experience was standing up and leaving after drinking the free pint for losing our order somewhere in their apparent “system”.
Avoid at all costs”

— Stefo

It's not often the price of a parma drops between a first and second attempt, but the last time we visited Transport we were stung $23.90, last night it was a much more tolerable $22 even. I won't be running back to Transport any time soon but it's nice to know I'm not being gouged on price.

This is a tough parma to sum up. Since 2012 they have definitely made some improvements and overall I think it was a better parma than it was - But I still wouldn't call it good. Average at best, but if you find yourself with no other options (as we did last night) you won't be too offended.

Pros

• Quite big for the price, very filling

Cons

• Thick crumbs
• Overpowering and overly sweet napoli
• Boomerang system forgot two of the five parmas we ordered

Parma - 4.80

Chips - 3.00

Salad - 3.00

Value - 5.20

Total - 4.16

The search continues...

#278 - 'Crème'

Where? - 2 Keilor Rd, Essendon North

Price? - $24.90

Website? - http://www.cremecafe.com.au/

Reviewers – Adam Y, Ashley, Lee, Nikki, Stefo

Our first attempt to visit Essendon North's Crème was back in April this year, however when I called on Thursday afternoon to make the booking we were turned away - Booked solid at 7pm on a Thursday. We made a switch at the last second and thats how our "Sporting Globe: Addendum" special attempt came to be.

This time around I was ready for them, calling in the booking on Wednesday morning for dinner on Thursday night - I wasn't taking any chances. With a confirmed booking we loaded up the Parma Bus and headed to the extremely busy Crème cafe.

We arrived at Crème a little around 6:30 and it was already filling up - This is a spot extremely popular with the "lets grab a coffee and have a chat" crowd, and after a quick glance at the mammoth glass cabinet filled with amazing looking cakes it's easy to tell why. We grabbed our seat and checked the menu...

Perfect. After a slight wait to get service (like I said, they were busy) we placed our order.

As for beers I was very surprised to see that Crème seem to have some sort of partnership with Holgate, their beer list being exclusively Holgate beers...

Not that there's anything wrong with that, I love a Holgate from time to time, it was just something I wasn't expecting to find in a suburban cafe.

After about a half hour wait our meals arrived from the kitchen.

Well. This looks surprisingly good!

Apart from some slightly soggy crumbs this schnitzel was hard to fault. A decent size, thick, served piping hot and the purest white chicken breast you ever did see. I don't have much more to say ... A tick in every box.

The toppings were pretty solid as well. A near 100% level of cheese coverage, grilled to a perfect golden brown hue. It was a little light on napoli, some chunky onion through the mix would have done wonders.

The pancetta was ... odd? Don't get me wrong, the slice of crispy pancetta on the top of the parma was a perfect addition, however as you can see from the photos this addition covered about 50 percent of the parma itself. It was a small disk of deliciousness floating amongst a sea of cheese, I found myself having to ration out bits of the pancetta to make it last longer. A great addition, but with another slice or two it would have been perfection.

The chips were pretty standard, ho-hum chips. As pretty much everyone said in the quotes below some proper beer battered fat chips would have been fantastic. The unsolicited pots of sauce for chip dipping were a nice touch though, always appreciated.

The chopped salad was fresh and crisp, chock full of the onion chunks I was wishing were in the napoli. I quite enjoyed mine but reception around the table was mixed - Some reviewers reporting a lot less "stuff" in their salad than I received.

“The parma was quite tasty however I would have loved more coverage of the pancetta. Combine this dish with some chunky beer battered chips and it would be amazing”

— Nikki

“Quite honestly the best parma I’ve had in a long time. Chips could be improved and a better coverage of pancetta would be appreciated”

— Stefo

“Very tasty. Wish the chips were beer battered and the pancetta should have covered the whole chicken. But all in all, delicious! ”

— Adam Y

“The parma was delicious but not enough pancetta and my salad was just lettuce and one piece of tomato”

— Ashley

$24.90 is on the pricey end of the spectrum for a parma these days, however you've got to remember this is at a cafe, not a pub, where prices for big mains are usually a little inflated. As its a cafe I couldn't see any parma specials around, although you do get the Herald Sun for free if you go in for breakfast ... Kicking goals.

I was surprised at how much I enjoyed the parma at Crème. Normally a parma at a cafe is asking for mediocrity but this one was absolutely delightful. There were a couple of issues with it, sure, but when your next closest option is The Linc directly across the road you take what you can get. Would definitely check it out again.

Pros

• Delicious, piping hot chicken breast
• Great coverage of toppings, tasty pancetta
• Holgate craft beer list

Cons

• Not enough pancetta
• Chips seemed phoned in for such a quality meal

Parma - 8.40

Chips - 6.40

Salad - 6.80

Value - 6.90

Total - 7.38

The search continues...

#277 - 'The Palace Hotel'

Where? - 505 City Rd, South Melbourne

Price? - $21, $15 parma night on Mondays

Website? - http://www.thepalacehotel.net.au/

Reviewers – Cale, Carly, Lee, Nikki, Shanan, Stefo, Tony

...And we're back!

Three weeks off was just what the doctor ordered (although he isn't happy with the damage to my liver that no doubt occurred), but travelling through the states there is one thing I just couldn't seem to nail down ... A decent parma.

I wanted a good one for the first one back, luckily, while we were abroad, someone brought my attention to this article published by Time Out Magazine, listing their picks for Melbourne's top five parmas. I checked the list and we had already been to four of the five, but one on the list we had not yet visited. South Melbourne's Palace Hotel. If you can't be bothered clicking the above link (or its five years after posting this article and they've taken down the site) this is what their write up looked like -

Sounds good to me! We brushed the leaves and bird crap off the parma bus, loaded it up and headed over to the Palace to see what all the fuss was about.

As soon as I walked through the door I knew I was gonna love this pub. This joint is just dripping in old school cool. You could visit the Palace every night of the week and still find something new to catch your eye. The staff were super friendly and keen to chat, and the Palace's claim of having Melbourne's best pub dog isn't that far from the truth as this bloke...

Is an absolute champion.

There's a beer garden out the back for summer nights (and it has heaters for when it gets chilly) A pool table beside an open fireplace, and a spacious bistro (also complete with fireplace).

We have a handy barometer at ParmaDaze to tell if a pub is going to be quality - If a pub has (1) Coat hooks, (2) A pub dog and (3) a fireplace, it's going to be an awesome pub. The Palace Hotel is a tick in every box.

We settled in the bistro and checked the menu - Thursday night is Pie Night at the Palace and hot damn did the pies coming out of the kitchen looked phenomenal. Matter of fact all the food coming out of the kitchen looked great - From burgers to chicken tenders I didn't see a single thing that didn't look delicious.

Top billing. 6 of the 7 of us opted for the Chicken parma while Reviewer Carly had to be different and went with the Eggplant - Check her quotes below to see what she thought of it.

On top of an awesome atmosphere, the Palace backs it up with a solid rotating tap list. Plenty on offer to tickle your fancy - Having just spent three weeks stuck with Miller Lite and Budweiser I was happy to stick to my old favourite, Stone & Wood.

Before too long our meals arrived from the kitchen -

I don't normally do this, but before we get to the chicken I've got to make special mention of the garlic bread you can see pictured behind the parma - It was amazing! I've never had garlic bread like it in my life. Hot, flavoursome and topped off with what I think were mustard seeds - This isn't your usual Woolworths $2.50 wrapped in tinfoil number, this was quality garlic bread that was a fine addition to the meal, Highly recommended.

Anyway, to the parma.

The schnitzel was top quality. Cooked to perfection, pure white juicy chicken breast. It was plump where it needed to be and the crumbs that weren't covered by cheese carried an outstanding crunch. Other than some slight crumb sogginess underneath this schnitzel is really hard to fault, definitely a fantastic start to the Palace's parma.

The toppings were mostly good. lashings of delicious, smokey ham alongside plenty of perfectly gooey-yet-golden-brown cheese. There was one failing with the toppings and we all pretty much said it at once ... Where was the napoli?

The time out review we posted above absolutely raved about the "best sauce they've tried full of rich onion sweetness" - Unfortunately that was nowhere to be found on our parmas. I'm not sure if the kitchen ran short or what happened but the parmas we got on review night barely had any detectable napoli. A damn shame as this parma probably would have scored perfect marks otherwise. Without the napoli it was still a damn tasty feed, but I can't help but imagine what might have been.

The chips were pretty good, nothing spectacular but a decent serving of fries, lightly salted. There were plenty of them, would have really come to life with a dipping sauce. They were okay.

The salad, like the parma, was also pretty fantastic. Heaps of crisp ingredients bursting with flavour and topped off with a delicious honey mustard dressing - Exactly what a side salad should be.

“Very nice parma, chicken was perfectly cooked. Toppings let this one down”

— Cale

“Loved the taste & quality of the parma - My only improvement would be the addition of some chunky napoli”

— Nikki

“A bit more napoli please”

— Stefo

“Definitely a bar you could have a good session at”

— Shanan

“Had the eggplant parma. Small but filling and very tasty. Crispy cheese was extra tasty. Decent amount of chips however scarce in the salt department. Overall left satisfied”

— Carly

“Good parma, average chips and great salad. Solid meal”

— Tony

For $21 I'd be back any night of the week for this parma, Even better Monday nights at the Palace is parma night, where you can get this bird for just $15. If you live anywhere in the vicinity of South Melbourne (and even if you don't) this is a parma worth trying for $15. It's worth trying for $21. It's worth trying.

The Palace is one of those pubs that has you checking the real estate listings so you can make it your local. Soaked in atmosphere and good times, I'm already trying to work out when I'm free to go back and have another sesh there. I want to try the pie, I want to try the burger, I want to try the chicken tenders, I want the garlic bread again and most of all I want to give the parma another crack - I hope the lack of napoli was just an isolated incident and we can give the Palace's parma the top 10 score it possibly deserves.

Pros

• Amazing pub, inside an out
• Awesome pub dog
• From garlic bread to parma the food was top notch

Cons

• Very little to no napoli on the parma

Parma - 7.83

Chips - 7.25

Salad - 8.00

Value - 7.50

Total - 7.68

The search continues...

#276 - 'The Linc: Re-Redux'

Where? - 1 Keilor Rd, Essendon North

Price? - $23.90

Website? - http://www.thelinc.com.au/

Reviewers – Cale, Lee, Nikki, Stefo

Oh, The Linc. What a love-hate relationship I have with this pub. On one hand it has been a solid watering hole and post-parma review hangout for many years. On the other hand it has been our lowest rated parma since 2011, with a total score of just 1.65 on our first visit, and 2.74 when it had it's first redo, exactly 99 parma attempts ago.

To be honest I was done with the Linc - But a couple of weeks ago after grabbing some dinner nearby I dropped into for a beer and a quick $20 in the pokies. I walked in to the front bar and my jaw dropped ... It was unrecognisable.

The front bar has had a complete overhaul. It's bright, it's roomy, its extremely inviting! I was sitting, partially in shock, sipping on my pint when I saw some parmas go past. I didn't get a great look (some people find it off-putting when strangers stare at their food), but I could tell something was different - Namely that they were no longer layering the napoli sauce on top of the cheese, as they did for our last two reviews.

If they have changed that ... Maybe they changed something else? Could the new look Linc be home to a new look parma?

I scheduled the re-review. There were complaints from the review team but I convinced them it'd be worth another look. Last night we loaded up the parma bus and headed back to the Linc.

I was a little disappointed to see that the Bistro at the Linc still had the same look as it used to, I'm hoping there is a plan to extend the new vibe to the rest of the pub that just hasn't been executed yet. We checked the menu, spied our target...

And visited the cashier to take our order. The parma at the Linc comes with a choice of chips, veggies or both - and a side salad is an extra $3.50. Nobody opted for the side salad this time around and just went with what came included.

First up were the always included hot bake-at-home rolls. Always a favourite. We followed that up with a couple of serves of cheesy garlic bread. I maintain that The Linc serves up some of the best garlic bread in Melbourne - and last night did not disappoint.

Despite the renovations the beer list is the same as it ever was. Lazy Yak being the craftiest beer on tap. The Linc seems to be putting all its weight behind its spirit and cocktail range, the new bar sporting industrial size dispensing machines for both Jägermeister and Fireball.

Shortly after polishing off our GB the parmas arrived. Lets take a look at the past vs the present before digging in.

2011 -

2014 -

2016 -

The chicken schnitzel is was pretty much the same as the Linc parma's 2014 counterpart. Reasonably big, real chicken, hammered a little bit thin for our liking but not criminally so. I could see some herbs through the crumbs but they didn't add much to the flavour profile of the parma. The crumbs were a little thicker than we would normally like and flaked away from the chicken when lifted from the plate - but nothing too offensive about them overall. Everything on the plate was served absolutely piping hot. The parma, the chips, the veggies - Everything was toasty warm. Definitely a plus.

As suspected, the cheese/ham/napoli layering has been changed to something a little more standard, and as a result the pools of oil that plagued this parma on our last two reviews were no longer an issue. The cheese was fine, well grilled (a little flavourless) the ham was there but also didn't add a whole lot and the napoli was virtually nonexistent this time around. This was close to a ham and cheese schnitzel than it was a parma. It may have been the two pints mixing with the cold & flu medication I was on at the time, but I honestly didn't hate this parma. It wasn't great ... But it wasn't terrible either.

The chips were back to a standard pub chip. As I mentioned before they were served piping hot, crunchy and fresh. Gone was the overly starchy taste that they were afflicted with last time - They were just desperate for a bit of seasoning. A dipping sauce wouldn't have gone astray either.

Its possibly the weirdest thing about the dish, but the Linc's parma comes with veggies over salad by default. I'm not against veggies by any means, but it just strikes me as such a weird choice that they seem determined to stick to. The veggies were fresh and hot. Zucchini and a massive slab of pumpkin went down quite well. The weird pile of mystery garnish was also back. The less said about that the better.

“Definitely improved from the last time, but definitely needed more napoli”

— Cale

“It has improved, although it’s still very pricey and could be a lot better”

— Nikki

“Let’s be honest, it hasn’t really changed much. Was an okay feed, but they need to change it dramatically if they want it to be decent”

— Stefo

The parma at the Linc is still quite pricey at $23.90. The included bake at home rolls do help heal the pain, but I wouldn't be racing back to shell out another $24 for the parma that we had.

The parma at the Linc is better than it was, and they definitely don't deserve the title of "lowest rated parma of all time" any more. It's still not great - but it's getting there. Throw in a fresh chunky napoli (under the cheese, of course) and a side of gravy for the chips and you're looking at a decent feed!

I don't think we'll be broaching Re-Re-Redo territory for quite some time so you will have to investigate yourself to see how it goes, but if you're a local it's definitely worth popping over to the Linc to check out the new vibe in the front bar. Grab yourself a serve of garlic bread or fried chicken sliders from the bar menu (they looked pretty good!) and see what you think. As I mentioned earlier I really hope they take the leap and extend this style of renovation to the rest of the pub - It's a winner.

Parma - 4.75

Chips - 4.63

Salad - 5.31

Value - 3.75

Total - 4.64

The search continues...

#275 - 'The North Fitzroy Arms'

Where? - 296 Rae St. Fitzroy North

Price? -  $20

Website? - http://www.northfitzroyarms.com.au

Reviewers – Al, Janet, Kim, Lee, Nikki, Pat, Shanan, Stefo

As my odometer clicked over to the big "33" last week, we decided to push our Thursday parma review to Friday, Affording us the ability to kick back and enjoy a few pints in celebration without having to worry about being seedy for work the next day. Our target location for this salubrious event? The much recommended North Fitzroy Arms.

We walked into this quaint backstreets local and after a few minutes of conversation with the review team a question came up ... Why are we reviewing this pub again?

"Again?" I queried ... "What do you mean Again? We've never been here before".

"Yes we have" another reviewer piped up. "We sat in the beer garden out there"

This sparked a long debate as to whether or not we had visited the North Fitzroy Arms already. I searched both the website and my memory ... Have we been here and I've forgotten? I just turned 33, Am I finally losing my mind?

Then it dawned on me. I wasn't here.

When I organised a holiday last year I put one of our review team in charge of writing the review for the week. He organised a session out with the lads and took everyone to the North Fitzroy Arms. Then, lazy prick that he is, never bothered to write the review that accompanied the visit - And thus it was lost to the sands of time.

"Was it any good?" I asked one of the reviewers that had been here on the first visit.

"I can't remember ... I think we had too many beers"

Probably for the best that review never got written.

Once all that nonsense was sorted, I took in my surroundings ... This was a damn nice pub! The quintessential backstreets local. Footy on the TV, Amazingly friendly staff behind the bar, a Friday night meat tray raffle doing the rounds and no less than five seperate fireplaces pumping out the heat, turning this pub into a cosy paradise on a chilly Friday evening.

We grabbed a seat out in the bistro, checked the menu...

... and ordered our meals.

There wasn't a huge array of beers on tap, but they made great use of the taps they had. Ranging from the crafty to the not-so-crafty there'd be something there for everyone's taste, and the chalkboard over the bar with the current offerings on tap listed would lead me to believe they get at least some level of rotation.

After we scoffed off an entree of house made popcorn chicken (delicious), our parmas arrived from the kitchen.

The schnitzel was the definite star of this parma. Big, thick, plump, piping hot, deliciously juicy with a crunchy crumb. Do I need to say more? That's a tick in every box as far as I'm concerned, however I do like my shnitty on the thick side - If you prefer your parma flattened out a little more then this might be bordering on a little too thick for you. In my opinion this was a stellar foundation for a meal.

Compared to the great schnitzel, the toppings were lacklustre. The trinity of napoli, ham and cheese failed to excite on all fronts.

Don't get me wrong, none of them were bad, But the ham (while generous) didn't carry a whole lot of flavour, the cheese needed another few minutes under the grill and the napoli was a bit lost amongst the other two - With such a great foundation in the schnitzel the toppings needed a little extra kick to get them going.

I don't normally do this, but one note on the presentation - I've never been big on the "parma on chips is a cardinal sin!" school of thought. I figure I'd rather have more food on my plate than have less so it all fits, and a seasoned parma eater can extract the chips from underneath before any real damage is done... However when the parma comes out like this:

Part of me has to wonder what's going on. There was almost more empty space on the plate than there was food, and yet they still chose to stack? Such an odd choice. Not to worry though, after a quick extraction the plate looked more like this:

Much better!

Unfortunately, after extraction, the chips were the weakest part of the dish. Lukewarm, soggy and look as if they'd been sitting for a while. They were edible (especially for those who saved the delicious garlic aoli from their popcorn chicken) but not great by any stretch. Especially when the entree menu has this on the menu-

They have Bad Boys?! A regular reader would know that Bad Boy chips are our absolute favourite. We've stumbled upon them quite a few times over the years and they have always been absolutely phenomenal. Knowing there are Bad Boy chips in the kitchen while we were served what we were just made it all the more disappointing.

The salad was good. Fresh and crisp with just enough balsamic for the serving size. A fine addition to the meal.

Enough of my blathering, lets see what everyone else thought (hopefully they remember eating it this time!)...

“The parma was decent; however it needed more seasoning, and too much cheese. Chips could’ve been crunchier”

— Al

“Parma was decent, sides needed a lift- Great pub though!”

— Shanan

“Nice warm parma, however the sides let it down”

— Stefo

“The thick breast was the best part, disappointing chips and salad”

— Pat

“Nice piece of chicken but the parma lacked flavour, chips and salad very average ... Good pub though”

— Kim

“Chips were average, Parma was decent!”

— Janet

“Lovely thick chicken but I would have liked it slightly thinner. Could have used more flavour in the toppings. If this was paired with the bad boy chips from the menu it would be amazing”

— Nikki

$20 in this day and age is cheap for a parma, and even though this one had its failings I'd be happy to pay it again. I may have had a bit of a whinge about this parma but it comes from a place of love as I really enjoyed this pub and the people in it.

It's times like this I kick myself that we don't get a score for the venue itself, as this pub would get top marks - definitely one of my favourite pubs that I've visited all year. The quotes from everyone else echo my opinion that this parma had a great foundation but was let down by some disappointing sides.

With a few tweaks this could be a phenomenal bird. Spice up the toppings a little, stop hoarding the bad boys and we would be in business! My complaints aside It's definitely a venue worth checking out, If you live locally and have yet to try the North Fitzroy Arms you are definitely missing out on your home away from home.

Pros

• Fantastic pub, possibly the best venue we've been to this year
• Top notch schnitzel, very hard to fault

Cons

• Disappointing sides
• Toppings needed more flavour

Parma - 7.14

Chips - 4.14

Salad - 5.29

Value - 7.00

Total - 6.14

The search continues...

#274 - 'The Junction Club: Redux'

Where? - 740 Mount Alexander Rd, Moonee Ponds.

Price? - Thursday parma night - $15.90 with pot

Website? - http://www.thejunctionclub.com

Reviewers – Carly, Fridge, Kim, Lee, Nikki, Pat, Shanan

We first visited the Junction back the year 2010 - it was our 32nd review, which you can refresh your memory on here. From memory it was a decent enough parma - Didn't blow us away by any stretch, but for a $12 parma & pot special six years ago it was okay.

Then, a few weeks ago, I was tagged in an Instagram photo and the following exchange ensued...

I've gotta admit, that parma looked good! I checked the website for the menu and found this description -

I'm an absolute sucker for a parma with prosciutto, so I was sold. We set the location, headed to the Junction, grabbed a table and were greeted by a surprising development when we sat down...

It was parma night again! How fitting that the two times we visit the Junction its on Parma & Pot night. I was a little thrown, as the "traditional" parma on the menu didn't come with the aforementioned prosciutto, but we decided to jump into parma night menu none the less. I opted for the traditional but the Mexican was also a popular choice, with a bolognese or two thrown in for good measure.

Beer selection at the Junction hasn't improved much since 2010 I'm afraid - If you're not a fan of VB, Carlton Draught or Pure Blonde I'm afraid you're out of luck. Bulmers pints were on special for $8.50 each so that was the drink of choice (aside from the pot of draught included with the parma)

About 20 minutes after ordering the meals started arriving from the kitchen. As is tradition with redo's, lets first take a look at the 2010 parma before jumping over to last night's...

The 2010 Junction parma night parma -

The 2016 Junction parma night parma -

I'm gonna start with a negative, but first up the schnitzel was rather small - Definitely smaller than the full priced parma featured in the Instagram pic, but the chicken was good quality. Pure chicken breast, thick enough, but not overly so, and coated with a solid layer of crumbs, without overcompensating. All up it was quite a decent foundation for a budget parma.

The toppings on the traditional were tasty, however those who indulged in the novelty varieties seemed to be happier with their choices. The napoli was fresh and flavoursome, there was a great coverage of cheese with a tasty blend, the ham was ... there, but didn't do a whole lot for the flavour profile, something smoked, with a bit more punch (like prosciutto, maybe?) would have really helped this dish along.

The chips were fantastic. Beer battered but thinner than your common steak chip (but still thicker than fries) these chips were on point. Crunchy on the outside with pillowy goodness inside and thoroughly seasoned. Definitely the star of the dish and almost worth the price of the parma alone.

The salad was okay. Nothing to write home about but not offensive by any means - A garden salad of lettuce, cucumber, tomato, onion and grated carrot in a splash of balsamic dressing. I could have used some more dressing and some more "flair" overall with the greens - But they did their job.

“The Mexican parma had plenty of topping and the chips were awesome - A quality feed”

— Shanan

“Great chips, decent parma, average salad”

— Carly

“Good feed, comes with a pot as well... Happy days!”

— Fridge

“Chips were awesome, parma was tasty... Great value for money”

— Kim

“Bolognese sauce was delicious”

— Pat

For only $15.90 with a pot this was quite a tasty meal for the price - and even more so if you indulge in the novelty toppings. Thursday parma nights are quite rare these days (They usually only appear Monday - Wednesday), so if you're on the hunt for a decent feed that won't break the bank then this is definitely one to consider.

This review was pretty firmly just relating to the Thursday night parma night at the Junction, which I think is pretty fitting as the first time we visited was also for their novelty parma night. After being suitably impressed with their discount option my curiosity has piqued as to what the full priced version is like... Definitely one to try another time.

In the meantime though, we were all quite happy with the Junction's parma night special, a marked improvement on its 2010 counterpart and a great cheap feed on a Thursday night.

Pros

• Quality parma for a great price
• Free pot
• Novelty options

Cons

• Mediocre salad
• Traditional parma could use a little more punch

Parma - 7.21

Chips - 7.71

Salad - 4.57

Value - 8.57

Total - 7.06

The search continues...

#273 - 'The Maori Chief Hotel'

Where? - 117 Moray St. South Melbourne

Price? - Traditional starts at $21

Website? - http://maorichief.com.au

Reviewers – Fridge, Lee, Matt, Nikki & Stefo

Of all the parmas on our "To Try" list, I think the Maori Chief has been there the longest, so long I have forgotten how it got there in the first place - part of me thinks it made it there after a Facebook poll asking for suggestions for pubs with good beer gardens, but who knows. Most importantly last night we loaded up the Parma bus and headed to South Melbourne's Maori Chief Hotel.

I'm tempted call the Maori Chief a "backstreets local pub", however being only one block from Clarendon street I don't think it quite qualifies as such - Yet it definitely has the vibe of a friendly, local watering hole. The Chief has the feel of a pub that could become your home away from home. Friendly staff, cosy fireplaces and (from what I hear) a damn fine beer garden to drink away the afternoon.

We arrived at the pub on Thursday evening, grabbed a pint, cosied up in front of the open fireplace in the dining room and checked the menu... What's this? We have some novelty options -

Normally I'm a Parma purist, but god damn I can't say no to a Mexi-Parma. Reviewers Nikki and Matt went the Traditional route as our control group. Reviewer Stefo got the Aussie, I got the Mexican, and Reviewer Fridge was oh-so brave and got himself the Chilli Parma. We placed our orders at the bar (with sides of gravy for chip dip) and awaited the arrival of our meals.

For a locals pub such as it is I was pleasantly surprised to find a tap list as crafty as it was. Nothing too fancy, but a  selection of eight taps running the gamut from Carlton Draught to Mountain Goat. Something for everyone.

After a quick pre-game of cheesy garlic bread, the different parmas starting appearing from the kitchen. Let's take a look, shall we?

The Original -

The Chilli -

The Aussie -

The Mexican -

First up lets talk schnitzel. This was a quality bit of bird. Pure white chicken breast hammered to a medium thickness. The crumbing was light (chicken even showing through in some spots) but I'd rather an under-crumbed schnitty than an over-crumbed one.

Well cooked, juicy and served piping hot. No matter what novelty toppings got piled on top, this was a quality foundation for a Parma.

Now on to the toppings discussion - Remembering that my experience was for the Mexican Parma, I'll get to everyone else's experience afterwards.

Hoo boy - was this ever a Mexican Parma. Atop the chicken was a healthy layer of hot salami, on that was plenty of spicy Chilli con carne, on that was the cheese, on that was the guacamole and on that was was a handful of corn chips.

First up - Although they look impressive, I don't think the corn chips are necessary on a mexi Parma. They only serve to slow me down from getting to my chicken and/or waste the guacamole that is reserved for my Parma.

Other than that, the toppings were damn tasty. The guacamole was fresh, the salami hot and the chilli con carne extremely flavoursome. To be honest, while I thoroughly enjoyed this dish, all I could really taste while eating it was salami and chilli. Overpowering, but in a good way.

As for the others, Stefo seemed very pleased with the Aussie, noting that the egg was perfectly runny and the bacon was a fine addition.

Nikki and Matt both enjoyed their traditional parmas, commenting that the Napoli sauce had a unique but unidentifiable flavour.

Fridge seemed underwhelmed - Apparently the "If you dare" promise of an insanely hot Parma was a cheque  that the Chiefs chilli Parma didn't cash. He said it was fine, very tasty - but not the explosion of heat that the menu promised.

Looking at the above photos I wouldn't blame you for thinking these parmas didn't come with chips. Other than them being served directly underneath (which Isn't a hell-worthy trespass in my book, a pro can extract them before any damage is done), it was only a small serving - A handful at best.

Other than that they were great. Hot, crispy with pillowy potato inside. The side of gravy for chip dipping was a wise choice, the gravy thick and rich with a heavy red wine flavour.

The salad was perfectly fine. Fresh cucumber, lettuce, cherry tomatoes, carrot, onion and mustard seeds. Very flavourful and a fine addition to the meal.

“Got the Chilli Parma - Was very nice but was expecting a little more spice. Chips and salad were quality”

— Fridge

“Such a cosy pub! Loved the open fireplace. The traditional parma was tasty and held its own against the novelty varieties”

— Nikki

“A great, friendly pub and a very decent meal”

— Stefo

“Quality chicken breast. The napoli sauce was a standout. Tasty and a generous serving”

— Matt

I'd have no problems coming back to the Maori Chief and paying $23 for another Mexi-Parma, Hell I'd even travel out of my way for the privilege. As icing on the cake the Chief runs a $15 Parma night, which (as far as I can tell) covers their novelty varieties as well. I'm telling you it's good, but if you're unsure this is definitely the night to come and dip your toe in the water.

I enjoyed the Maori Chief. It's a laid back pub in an area that you wouldn't expect to find a laid back pub. Good vibes, good people, good grub - Definitely worth a visit.

Pros

• Some great novelty options
• Traditional stands on its own

Cons

• Small serving of chips
• "Super hot" Chilli Parma doesn't deliver

 

Parma - 7.40

Chips - 6.90

Salad - 6.40

Value - 7.00

Total - 7.02

The search continues...

#272 - 'The Spottiswoode Hotel'

Where? - 62 Hudsons Rd. Spotswood

Price? - $19.50

Website? - http://spottiswoode.com.au/

Reviewers – Cale,Lee, Nikki & Stefo

The Spottiswoode is a pub with a ... lets say "colourful" past. If you had've visited the Spotty five years ago you might not have made it out. The boarded up windows and overall unsavoury vibe of the place would have caused many a local to take a very wide berth.

But as of a few years ago everything changed. The boards came off the windows, the floors were polished and the Spottiswoode was transformed to a dank dive bar to a family friendly gastropub, and last night we headed down to the new and improved Spotty to give their parma a crack.

The first thing that strikes you about the Spottiswoode is how utterly huge it is. Long wooden tables abound in the airy front bar, the building winds around into lounge areas, dining areas, a room for the kids up the back and (I didn't investigate as it was friggin' cold) I have heard rumours of a decent beer garden as well. It's a warm, locals pub with a super friendly vibe - and even at 7 o'clock on a Thursday the door didn't stop opening with fresh groups of patrons coming in from the icy cold June evening.

We grabbed a table at one of the oversized booths and checked the menu -

And ordered our parmas.

For a pub thats a stone's throw (if you can throw a stone 500 meters) from the Two Birds Brewery, I was surprised to find that they didn't have Two Birds on tap. A couple of crafty options but nothing really noteworthy. A few pints of Furphy did the trick nicely.

After a pre-game of the damn delicious cheesy garlic bread, the parmas arrived shortly after...

The parma arrived piled high on a stack of chips, after a quick reshuffling to get them free we tucked in. The circumference of the schnitzel looked a little small on the plate, but it was thick enough that it wasn't a huge issue - by the end of the meal nobody walked away from the table hungry.

The schnitzel was pure chicken breast, well cooked and juicy. Crumbs were slightly thicker than I prefer, but not to the degree that you would feel like they're trying to cover something up. Our biggest complaint is that the schnitzel just wasn't served hot enough, which detracted from the flavours of the parma quite a bit.

Other than that minor stumble it was a quality foundation to the dish.

The toppings were full of flavour and, unlike the schnitzel they sat upon, served piping hot. The napoli sauce was rich and the cheese blend was extremely tasty (literally, very heavy on the tasty cheese, which I'm always a fan of).

The one thing that was missing was a slice of ham. The parma did well without it, don't get me wrong, but a slice of ham would have really juiced it up.

The serving of chips was massive without a doubt - unfortunately they suffered the same fate as the schnitzel. Served lukewarm at best they felt as if they had been sitting for a while before we got them. A bit of sauce and salt partially rescued them, but the chips were definitely the weakest part of the dish.

The salad was fresh and jam packed with ingredients. Cucumber, salad, plenty of onion and a heap of capsicum with plenty of creamy dressing. A couple of the plates at the table also got tomato, I wasn't that lucky - Either way a fine side to the dish.

“Great pub, great atmosphere, great food. Parma was good”

— Cale

“Good vibe to the pub, some great flavours in the parma but stumbled a little in the execution - Everything could have been a little warmer”

— Nikki

“I’m not sure what to write - It didn’t really blow my socks off”

— Stefo

A parma under $20 in this day and age is always lovely to see, and I'd have no qualms shelling out another $19.50 to get this parma again. All of our criticisms from last nights parma could be chalked up to an unfortunate error in the kitchen, all the elements of greatness are there if they just came out a little hotter. Wednesday night at the Spotty is Parma & Pot night for $15, If you're in the area and feel like a cheap feed then this is definitely one I'd recommend checking out, especially at that price.

The Spottiswoode is a fantastic little locals pub with a friendly country atmosphere. Anyone in Spotswood should be stoked to have it as their local. The parma had a few issues but nothing that couldn't be fixed. Definitely worth checking out if you're in the area.

Pros

• Great flavours though the toppings
• Large servings of the sides
• Friendly, welcoming local pub

Cons

• Schnitzel and chips were served a little cold
• Parma could use a slice of ham

Parma - 7.50

Chips - 5.25

Salad - 6.25

Value - 8.00

Total - 6.90

The search continues...

#271 - 'Mamma Lina's'

Where? - 257 Keilor Rd, Essendon

Price? - $24.50

Website? - http://mammalinas.com.au

Reviewers – Lee & Nikki

Mamma Lina's is one of those places that has seemingly been around forever. Possibly since the dawn of time or earlier - Scholars maintain that on the seventh day, after God had rested up a bit he went down to Mamma Lina's to grab a coffee. It's a Keilor Road institution, and an absolute travesty that we haven't been there earlier. So last night we headed down to give their parma a crack.

There isn't a whole lot to say about the interior of Mamma's, if you've been into a cafe in Melbourne you know what you're in for. There's a small bar up one end, a selection of delicious looking fresh cakes in the window, a small lounge area if you feel like kicking back opening up to a larger dining area around the back.

We grabbed a table, ordered a beverage, grabbed the menu and identified our target for the evening...

There are a few beers available, no taps - everything is bottled. The craftiest option would be a Lord Nelson Pale Ale, but other than that your choices are pretty standard. VB, Draught, Crown Lager, Peroni, Heineken etc.

15 or so minutes after ordering our parmas arrived from the kitchen...

The first thing that struck me about this parma was the schnitzel. Very traditional Italian style schnitzels with a deliciously herb and parmesan infused crumb. Hammered a little thin for my personal taste, this schnitzel screams home made - as if Mamma Lina herself was working in the kitchen.

Real chicken breast, full of flavour however it was quite oily, which weighed on my stomach at the end of the meal.

The napoli was fresh and bursting with flavour (and a hint of sweetness), I wouldn't be surprised if it was home made as well. As I mentioned earlier this is a very traditional Italian style parma, and as such there was no ham, which was a shame as a slice or two of ham would have really made this parma shine.

I normally like a bit more variety than just mozzarella in my cheese blend, but the mozza on this parma served its purpose just fine.

The chips were probably the weakest part of the dish. Standard chips, served unseasoned, a little hard and starchy (almost as if they had been sitting for a while). A decent enough sized serve, but some fresher chips would have really helped this dish.

The salad was fine. Nothing really noteworthy, quite oily much like the parma itself but carried a great flavour.

almost $25 is pretty pricey for what we received, but I suppose Cafe prices are a different world to pub grub prices so it can't be judged as harshly. No special parma nights that I could see. If I found myself at Mamma Lina's again I wouldn't have too much issue with getting this parma again, but I don't think I'd travel any measurable distance to get it again.

The Mamma Lina's parma was fine, let down by weak sides and oily schnitzel it was a few steps shy of great. However if you're in the mood for a traditional schnitzel like Nonna used to make then this is definitely one to consider.

Pros

• Great homemade crumbs
• Tasty schnitzel

Cons

• Weak sides
• Very oily

Parma - 7.00

Chips - 4.00

Salad - 6.00

Value - 6.25

Total - 6.05

The search continues...

#270 - 'The Royal Hotel'

Where? - 41 Spensley St. Clifton Hill

Price? - $20

Website? - http://www.royalhotelcliftonhill.com.au/

Reviewers – Lee, Matt, Nikki, Stefo

The Clifton Hill Royal Hotel was the cover-parma for the Herald Sun's recent list of Victoria's 25 best parmas, and after a couple of attempts earlier this year, the last of the (now infamous) list that we had yet to review - So for the sake of completion we loaded up the parma bus and headed to the 151st Pokemon of a parma that is the Royal Hotel.

On paper the Royal Hotel ticks every box of what I like in a pub. A hidden away backstreets local. A fireplace to warm up by, plenty of different nooks and areas to get lost in, pool tables, a solid craft beer list and (hopefully) some good grub.

Photo nicked from The Royal Hotel's website.

In person the Royal delivers on its promise. Upon entry you're greeted by an airy (yet warm) front bar bustling with activity. There are tables scattered around for those after a feed and plenty of stools at the bar for those looking to pull up a pew. Beyond that is a dim and cosy cocktail lounge, with a more comfortable "chill out" vibe and beyond that again is an elegant dining room (with a touch of country pub flair). There's also a sunny atrium and a walk-in bottle shop to grab a traveller on the way home. Quite possibly the perfect local pub.

We were lucky enough to grab a table in the busy front bar, grabbed a menu and spied our target...

Its worth noting that the bistro out the back has a different menu to the front bar - As far as I can tell the parmas are only available on the more casual dining focussed bar menu.

As I mentioned, the Royal is no slouch when it comes to their beer selection, with taps running the entire gamut of tastes, and an impressive selection of bottled beers if you can't find what you're after in the kegs. Too many to list, you'd better go and check it out for yourself.

About 30 minutes after ordering our meals arrived from the kitchen -

It may not look it from the photos, but this was an impressive schnitzel. An intimidatingly thick slab of pure white chicken breast, lightly panko crumbed and fried. My only criticism for the schnitzel was that it lacked the trademark crunch of a panko crumbed schnitzel, and wound up a tad soggy. Other than that this was a great bird, and a fantastic foundation for the toppings.

The toppings were probably the weakest element on the plate - but by no means a deal breaker. The main focus of criticism around the table was the napoli. There was heaps of it... too much, and unfortunately it tasted like straight-from-the-bottle tomato passata.

The other toppings were quality - plenty of tasty, gooey cheese and not at all tight on the ham ... If they just eased off the napoli a little (maybe swap it out for a chunky home made variety) and this parma would be a tick in every box.

The hand cut chips were delightful. Cooked to pillowy perfection, well seasoned and astonishingly filling. A fine addition to the plate.

The coleslaw was creamy, tasty and not in short supply at all. A little rich when trying to eat it straight, but an absolute winner when combined with a fork-full of parma.

“I liked it, but it was so saucy! When you can push your fork in and the rest of the toppings ooze out around the fork there’s a but too much happening there!”

— Stefo

“Quality chicken breast if a bit undercooked in my case. At this price point, great portion sizes all around”

— Matt

“Good parma - On the verge of being great. My biggest concern was too much napoli. This would have been okay if it was home made sauce but it tasted a little like pureed tomato from a tin. Would be amazing with some herbs, chunky tomato and onion”

— Nikki

For a $20 feed I was groaning in contentment when I finished. The massive chicken combined with the super-filling hand cut chips and coleslaw, I guarantee you're not walking away from this bird hungry. The aforementioned Herald Sun review of the Royal called it "Peerless for the price" and I am inclined to agree (Probably the only thing in that article that I do agree with). Zero qualms shelling out another $20 for this meal ... A total bargain, pure and simple.

The Royal Hotel is a tick in every box for me. Great pub, great beers great grub. If I didn't live a half-hour drive from Clifton Hill I'd happily call this my local - Parma was good, a few minor tweaks from great, but definitely one worth checking out.

Pros

• Quality ingredients
• Absolute bargain
• Great hand cut chips

Cons

• Soggy crumbs
• Too much napoli

Parma - 7.13

Chips - 6.88

Salad - 6.25

Value - 7.63

Total - 7.00

The search continues...

#269 - 'The Olympic Hotel'

Where? - 31 Albert St. Preston

Price? - $23.90

Website? - http://www.theolympichotel.com/

Reviewers – Lee, Nikki, Stefo

We went into this week's review pretty much blind. During dinner conversation at last week's trip to Insignia Reviewer Stefo suggested that we next try a pub somewhere near to his work in Preston. Not having spent too much time in the area I agreed, and The Olympic Hotel was found almost entirely by Googling the phrase "pubs in Preston".

One thing that shocked me about the Olympic on arrival was its sheer size, This place is absolutely massive. With a Bistro, sports bar (with pool table and darts), TAB, Pokies, bottle shop and kids play area they're definitely going for an "Everything under one roof" kind've experience.

We grabbed a table in the bistro and checked the menu -

One thing that I do want to mention is that the Olympic Hotel would have to have some of the friendliest staff we've ever come across. From the Server in the bistro to the girls behind the bar to the bouncer out the front - Everyone was super happy, friendly and had a smile on their face. Definitely worth a mention as it made our dining experience that much more enjoyable.

As for beers I wasn't expecting a lot when I opened up the drinks menu. As I had feared the tap list doesn't extend far beyond VB, Carlton or Bulmers - However I was astonished to find a very lean bottled craft beer menu. Grabbed a stubby of Stone & Wood (a tad pricey at $8.70 each) and awaited our parmas arrival ... which wasn't long, as no more than 10 minutes later our meals appeared from the kitchen -

The schnitzel was thick, plump - but a little dry. It had a strong smokey/burnt fragrance yet I couldn't actually see any burnt parts - it was all cooked quite well, which was very confusing. Pretty light on the crumbs and pure chicken breast. A decent start, could have been served a bit hotter, but that is a minor criticism.

The toppings were pretty much straight from the packet. The napoli tasted a little tinny and the cheese and ham, while plentiful, didn't add a whole lot to the flavour profile. It was all fine - but nothing outstanding.

Chips were thinner than steak chips but thicker than french fries. Desperate for a little seasoning, the staff were happy to provide some tomato sauce for dipping on request. Points for not being served smooshed under the parma.

The salad looked damn impressive on the plate. A separate bowl bursting with carrot, lettuce, cucumber, tomato, olives and feta cheese. I couldn't wait to tuck in. The ingredients were crisp and fresh with a refreshing dressing - The olives were a punch of flavour but the feta was extremely underwhelming - I don't think I've tasted a more utterly flavourless feta in my life.

“Great friendly service, parmas were quick to arrive but the meal was average at best”

— Stefo

“Staff were super friendly, open and spacious pub - Just needed a little more love in the parma ”

— Nikki

$23.90 is a tad pricey for what we received. I noticed there is a cheaper option available in the sports bar but I can't vouch for it being the same as what was served in the bistro.

When I saw that the Olympic was a corporate pokies pub my expectations were low - And what we received was definitely better than what I was expecting, however it didn't blow us away. I think this is the shortest review I've done on this site in years, because I've just got nothing to say about it ... It was by no means bad, but it wasn't great. If I were to find myself at the Olympic again I'd have no qualms giving it another crack, but I don't think I'd travel for the experience.

Pros

• Friendly staff & atmosphere
• Unexpected Stone & Wood!
• Quick service
• Thick chicken breast

Cons

• Tinned toppings
• unseasoned chips
• Dry chicken

Parma - 6.00

Chips - 5.83

Salad - 6.67

Value - 6.00

Total - 6.10

The search continues...

#268 - 'Insignia'

Where? - 502 Flinders St, Melbourne

Price? - $13.50

Website? - None that I could find, except for their Facebook page

Reviewers – Fridge, Lee, Matt, Nikki, Stefo

**EDIT** 14/06/16 - Just got some feedback from Insignia and they have said that they have backed off the amount of cinnamon used in the napoli, and they assure us that the schnitzels used are 100% chicken breast, flattened out and crumbed.

It's tight-arse week here at ParmaDaze, not a regular feature - but after a few weeks of parmas over the $25 mark it was time to dial it back a bit and find a bird that doesn't hurt the wallet as much. I delved into my archive of suggested pubs and found an email sent to me by a reader named Jacob, who recommended we try the CBD pub near the Aquarium. I looked them up and it seemed like the perfect target. We loaded up the parma bus, grabbed a handful of church change and headed to Insignia.

When it comes to CBD pubs Insignia has a unique vibe. From outside it looks like a tiny hole in the wall, but inside its airy and open, with plenty of space to either stand, lean or lounge. From the moment we walked in we felt comfortable and welcome. A warm pub with friendly staff and a fantastic vibe.

Insignia is all about the specials. $16 jugs, $8.00 shots, $8.50 cocktails and (of course) $13.50 main meals. All day, every day. We checked the menu,  spied our target...

And placed our orders at the bar

A surprising amount of tap options ran the length of the bar, pretty much the entire James Squire range of beers is on tap, with a few other options thrown in for good measure. Boags, Superdry and Cider fall under the $16 jug category, with the fancier Squire options going for $20

About 25 minutes later our meals arrived at the table.

The schnitzel was served piping, almost impossibly hot and fresh. I'd swear I was eating it straight off the grill. Unfortunately a $13.50 parma comes with the level of schnitzel quality you'd expect for that price. It was big in circumference but quite thin and processed. At the very least the crumbs weren't too thick.

On the spectrum of store bought schnitzels this was one of the better grades, but still a store bought schnitzel.

The toppings, like the schnitzel, was served ridiculously fresh. The cheese was molten and gooey like a bright yellow lava flow. Ham is usually the first ingredient to go when you enter the budget parma spectrum and this parma was no different - a shame, as a slice of pork would have really helped this one.

The napoli was the most contentious part of the meal, namely one ingredient in the napoli that struck the palate like a Mack truck. There was some argument as to what the mystery spice was, but the general consensus around the table was cinnamon. A bold choice for a tomato napoli, and pretty much everyone eating the parma at the table agreed it was the wrong choice. Cinnamon is such a bold flavour and as such it detracted from everything else in the dish.

The chips were standard pub chips. Reviewer Stefo ordered a plate of Arancini balls with garlic aioli as an entree (which were fantastic, btw) so the left over aioli served as a chip dip to the otherwise rather plain chips. Not bad, not great.

Opinions on the salad wavered from person to person, I think due to different people getting different amounts of stuff in their salad. I drew the short straw, scoring two slivers of onion, a cucumber slice and some capsicum skin amongst my lettuce. The leaves were fresh, tossed in a tasty balsamic dressing - so not all bad.

“The price was the highlight, the the experience in general was a bit of a let down”

— Stefo

“I feel the scores won’t reflect the nature of this pub. It’s not trying to compete with the big hitters; it’s a cozy corner pub for your after work needs: A decent parma and a couple of beers. On this, I think it was good value (especially per the price)”

— Matt

“I can’t stand cinnamon, and the mystery spice in the napoli tasted a lot like cinnamon... not for me”

— Nikki

“Parma was a good size, the hint of cinnamon in the sauce wasn’t for me. Chips were good and salad wasn’t too bad, could have used an extra slice of capsicum and cucumber... It was refreshing to get a meal for under 15 clams”

— Fridge

I think reviewer Matt hit the nail on the head with his quote - This isn't a parma looking to play with the big boys. Its a cheap feed with cheap drinks in a pleasant atmosphere. It was beyond refreshing walking out of a parma night only $33.50 down, and that includes a jug of James Squire Golden Ale. No specific parma nights on the books as the cheap meals run all day every day.

One special I did see posted on the walls was for a pizza and tasting paddle of James Squire beers for $10... That sounds almost too good to be true.

I enjoyed my night at Insignia. Its a down to earth pub in an area where you wouldn't expect to find a down to earth pub. I won't be rushing back for a parma but will definitely keep it in my mind as a place for a cheap brew and feed without breaking the bank.

Pros

• Everything was cheap
• Fresh & piping hot ingredients

Cons

• Low quality schnitzel
• Needed ham
• Weird cinnamon flavour through the napoli was overpowering

Parma - 4.70

Chips - 4.50

Salad - 3.80

Value - 7.10

Total - 4.96

The search continues...

#267 - 'The Rose Hotel: Redux'

Where? - 406 Napier St. Fitzroy

Price? - $25

Website? - http://www.therosefitzroy.com.au/

Reviewers – Lee, Matt & Nikki

Before we get into this I feel like I need to make some things clear from the jump - Mainly that I am not a Fitzroy local. Before last night the only other time I have been to the Rose was for our first review in 2010, so beyond my thoughts at the time of "This is a lovely little pub" The pre-renovation Rose holds no sentimental place in my heart - So I'm hoping to approach this as a bit of an unbiased, outside observer.

If you have no idea what we're talking about, there is currently a bit of hubbub around the interwebs in regards to the Rose, somehow it has inadvertently become the poster child for "Local backstreets pub bought out and stripped of its soul". It's no secret that I love a backstreets local, and the Rose was well overdue for a redo, so we loaded up the parma bus and headed to Fitzroy to check out the new and (possibly) improved Rose Hotel.

We pulled up at the Rose and noticed quite a few people gathered by the outdoor tables enjoying a beer - It would seem the negativity towards the rennos aren't affecting business as this place was packed. Almost every table in the front room was taken, we managed to snag a high table by the bar in the middle of the action (after ordering we discovered that there was a much quieter dining area out the back with plenty of space, but the atmosphere is much better up front).

Yep, this place is virtually unrecognisable from the pub we wandered into six years ago. Gone is the dark, dank pub and in its place is a light, airy and open watering hole. It would seem the years of memorabilia that had built up on the walls of the old Rose has been distilled into a "best of", with a lot of the footy jumpers and such still remaining. If you were a local of the Rose I could understand your hesitance ... this is not the Rose of old, this is Rose 2.0.

As I said we grabbed a table and checked the menu, the list of mains at the Rose has been streamlined to just 6 options, but to be honest I don't think you could want for anything more...

In 2010 the parma clocked in at $13. Six years later and there has been a $12 price hike to $25, which (it's sad to say) isn't out of the ordinary these days. Inflation is a bitch, especially if you're (hopefully) taking a leap in quality of ingredients.

As for beers I was set as soon as I saw Stone & Wood on tap, but there are plenty of options for the craft and non-craft lover alike, before ordering your pint do yourself a favour and run a lap of the bar to get a look at all the different taps on offer.

About 15 minutes after placing our orders the parmas arrived from the kitchen. As is tradition with Redo week, first we'll look at the 2010 Rose Hotel parma, and then at the 2016 entry...

2010 -

2016 -

Gone is the processed, heart shaped, oversized chicken nugget and in its place is a thick, plump and extremely juicy chicken breast. The black ring of ash is gone and in its place is a conservatively crumbed, well cooked hunk of chicken. What it lacks in circumference it makes up for in thickness, swelling out to well over an inch thick in parts, a major improvement over the 2010 version.

The toppings are where things get interesting, and a little contentious. The napoli was fresh, chunky and flavoursome (although I could have used a little more of it), the cheese was plentiful and well grilled, although not too noteworthy... The ham is where things get a bit interesting.

We have never had ham like this on a parma before, it had a wholly unique flavour that we have never come across in the past, and horribly hard to describe. It was extremely salty, and tasted almost brined - not unlike corned beef. I likened it to a pastrami, however my companions at the table did not completely agree with me. Whatever it was it was an absolute punch of flavour. I enjoyed it thoroughly, as did one of my fellow reviewers ... However Reviewer No. 3 was not as big of a fan, wishing they had just gone with a standard ham instead. It's a divisive ingredient and I'd say its down to personal preference as to whether or not its your thing.

Now on to the chips. A big serving of french fries served beside the parma. They were well seasoned and hot when they arrived, however unless fries (aka Macca's chips) are served absolutely perfectly they go downhill extremely fast, which these did. By the time I finished my parma and got to the fries they were cold, hard and not nearly as enjoyable as if they had've had a good quality steak chip. They weren't horribly bad, but after a pretty damn good parma they were a wholly "meh" addition

The salad landed pretty much in the exact same boat as the chips, just uninspired. A plate of nothing but rocket leaves with minimal dressing. They were fresh and crisp, but nothing more.

“Sides were forgettable, but I thought the parma was damn tasty. A different flavour coming from the ham perhaps, we’re not sure. After so many parmas ‘different’ is good”

— Matt

“Major improvement on last time, but still a couple of elements left wanting... Not sure about the h”

— Nikki

The $12 price hike since 2010 is substantial, but when you're taking such a drastic leap in quality of ingredients then it is to be expected. $25 for the bird we got is pushing it a little, but if I were to find myself at the Rose again I'd have no qualms shelling out another 25 clams. There is no mention of any discount parma night that I am aware of.

Hopefully it won't be another six years before I visit the Rose again. The parma is not without it's faults, but overall it was a solid meal in an enjoyable atmosphere. I encourage the haters online to go and visit with an open mind and don't decide that you hate the place before walking through the door. Sure it has definitely lost a bit of its old world charm, but it's still a down to earth (albeit modernised) pub with friendly staff, decent food and plenty to offer.

Pros

• Light years ahead of its 2010 counterpart
• Quality chicken breast
• Unique, flavoursome ham (although may be considered a con to some)

Cons

• Lackluster sides
• A bit pricey

Parma - 8.00

Chips - 5.17

Salad - 4.33

Value - 6.20

Total - 6.34

The search continues...